FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

To his credit, Liam took his firing better than he thought he would have. Sure, he essentially rolled over when confronted, to the point where he probably would have happily accepted being dragged out of the Mart in handcuffs. Sure, he was in such a daze afterwards that he did not remember actually walking home. And sure, he spent the entire rest of the night lying in his bed, wide awake, unwilling to even acknowledge his roommate Stoutland's existence, let alone explain what had happened.

The point is, in the pantheon of “ways Liam has dealt with misfortune in the past," this was easily one of the more mature and level-headed responses.

Some time around breakfast, he finally managed to pick himself back up and opened the curtains to face the cold light of morning. Then, and only then, did he let himself think about what he could do, next. There were no shortages of jobs in town, each one as adequate as the one he had just gotten fired from. Most of the really good ones required greater involvement in the League, and Liam was pretty sure he was going to have to avoid the League for the foreseeable future. Still, there were jobs that did not require any sort of official Pokemon training. He could get a job with the public works department, as long as it was something simple like sanitation or something. He would probably be happy as a garbage collector. Probably.

His eyes roved over towards the kitchen, where he had put down the business card that Lopunny had handed him.

He nodded to himself. Garbage collection sounded nice.

No matter how hard he tried, he could not tear his eyes away from the kitchen.

Garbage collection was good, honest work. He could be proud of that.

A few hours later, he found himself standing in front of a large building, just on the edge of town. The address on the business card in his hand told him this was supposed to be where Patias Underground Media, LLC was located. He had dressed up as well as he could, on short notice: a proper button down shirt and his least worn out khakis. He ran a hand through his straight black hair, trying to make sure it had not fallen into disarray in the thirty seconds since he last checked. Then, with a deep breath, he suppressed any questions he had about why he was doing this and made his way through the automatic doors.

The offices of Patias Underground Media were built inside the footprint of what was once a rather large and spartan warehouse. A rather valiant attempt was made to make the space feel less industrial. Stepping through the large double doors, Liam was surrounded on three sides by wooden dividing walls, which marked out the “lobby." The concrete immediately at the entrance gave way to glued-on carpeting, with couches along the perimeter and a stately mahogany desk standing between Liam and the two doors leading further in. Were it not for the dividers giving way to a large empty space, leading up to the metallic skeleton of the roof above, or the ugly spiderweb of power and network cables hanging above without the civilizing cover of a drop ceiling, Liam might have been convinced he had walked into any ordinary office.

There was also a Pokemon at the front desk, instead of a human secretary. That was also a bit odd, on reflection. A little Kirlia beamed at him with her small white face, making an effort to look like she belonged there even as she balanced on her pointed green toes on the seat and leaned against the edge of the desk for balance.

“Hi!" she chirped, with a bubbly chatter of Pokemon speech. Then, catching herself, she said “I-I mean... good morning, sir. Welcome to the offices of Patias Underground Media. What can I do for you, today?"

Liam, not one to question these kinds of things, nervously put the business card down in front of the Pokemon. “I'm here to see the boss," he explained. “I was invited to come in for an interview by... um, Jez? Her name was Jez."

“Oh, you mean Jezebel? Yeah, I know her. Everyone here knows her." Kirlia smiled. As she did so, the little red horns in her hair began to shake, almost imperceptibly. The air around the desk seemed to smile, with her. “I think Mister Redwood is in his office, now. I can call him, if you'll give me a minute."

“Uh, sure," Liam replied, trying his hardest to seem like he knew what he was doing. “Take your time."

Kirlia, for just a moment, had an expression of childish glee on her face, as she realized she was going to use the office phone for the first time. It was a moment's work for her to restrain herself. Clearing her throat, she brought her hand up and then pressed it down on the buttons, with what she clearly thought was the appropriate level of secretarial gravitas. The speakerphone rang, and then there was a click. “Mister Redwood?" she called into the receiver. “There's a young man, here to see you for an interview. A human. He's been referred by Miss Jezebel."

“Really?" came a voice on the other end. Liam recognized it as the man he had met, yesterday. “I'm pretty sure I know who you're talking about. Go ahead and send him up."

“Yes sir, Mister Redwood."

Kirlia was about to reach for the button to hang up, when Mister Redwood's voice came in, once again. “Oh, and Grey?"

“Y-yes, sir?"

“You're doing a fantastic job. Very professional sounding."

There was a click, and the call disconnected. Grey the Kirlia stared at the phone a moment, mouth agape. Then, standing up, she covered her mouth with her hands and let out a delighted little squeal. Liam felt unvarnished joy wash over him, as tangible against his skin as warm sunlight. His own mouth quirked up into a smile, almost against his will.

She allowed herself only a moment for that, however. Then, with another titanic effort of will, she once again resumed the role of the very professional receptionist. Pointing to the door on her right, she said “You'll find Mister Redwood's office at the end of the hall. Please, go on in."

“Thank you, Grey." Liam's mind finally caught up with his smile, as he fixed the small, vaguely human shaped creature the most genuinely happy look he had to offer since “the incident." Then, he turned and stepped through the door into a tight hallway. These were as artificial as the lobby outside, though apparently they had managed to negotiate a drop ceiling onto the top of both the hall itself, and the multiple offices that hung off of its sides. It was noticeably quieter, lacking the rush of air or the dim hubbub that had been coming from other corners of the warehouse.

Liam, who at the time had not noticed the sounds, found their sudden absence to be unnerving. He could not get across the hall fast enough. At the end was a particularly stately door, with a frosted glass window and stenciled black and gold letters that read “Bruce Redwood, CEO."

“You can come in," a voice inside called, before Liam had gotten his second knock in. Liam flinched, but turned the handle and stepped inside.

Mr. Redwood's office was about what one would expect from the boss's office. Large desk at the back, couch tucked into one corner. Photographs lined the walls, of the boss with various Pokemon. A large bookshelf took up a large chunk of the right wall, loaded down with titles too arcane and science-y for Liam to decipher. The only thing that marked the office as unusual was the fact that it lacked any sort of windows. Actually, that was not entirely true: a second look caused Liam to notice the wires which snaked out of the fake drop ceiling, forming conduits around the bottom of the skirting boards. Compromises had clearly been made, between aesthetics and functionality, when these rooms were built.

The boss looked up from his papers. He was somewhere in his thirties, a soft-faced man with a professional haircut and a general bearing that implied he spent a good chunk of his morning in front of the mirror. Standing up, he thrust out a hand. “Good to see you again," he said. “Bruce Redwood."

“Liam Chambers," Liam replied, taking the man's hand in a firm shake.

“All right." Bruce motioned for one of the seats in front of the desk, before sitting back down. “I was planning on coming back to the Mart to talk to you, within the next few days, but it seems my Lopunny decided to take matters into her own hands. She must like you a lot, to have called you up here so quickly."

“Yes, I..." The mental image of the night before flashed through Liam's head. He quashed those thoughts, immediately. “...I very much got that impression, sir."

Bruce shook his head, with a chuckle. “She's certainly enthusiastic. Did you bring your ID with you?"

“Oh. Yes, I did." Rummaging through his pant pocket, Liam pulled out his wallet and pulled out his old League identification card. He put it down on the desk and leaned back, drumming his fingers against his knees.

“Very good, very good." Bruce snatched up the card and turned toward his computer monitor. There was a moment of silence, punctuated only by the vague mouth noises the older man made, as he typed Liam's Original Trainer Number in. Finally, Bruce spoke again, his eyes not leaving the screen. “It's a rare talent, you've got."

Liam flinched. “I-I'm sorry, sir?"

“Talking to Pokemon." Bruce made eye contact for a moment, before focusing back on his screen. “Not a lot of people can just do that, especially not with creatures they just met. Most trainers can only ever manage a basic understanding, and even then mostly with just the Pokemon they've bonded with."

“I... guess?" Liam fidgeted in his seat. “I dunno. I've sort of just always been able to do that. It started when I tried to understand my Lillipup, and that took... a couple of weeks? Then there was Houndour, and she took a little less time. The next one took less time than that, and after a while, it just... wound up taking no time at all."

Bruce nodded, though something on his computer caused his brow to knit. “Actually, hold that thought. You just said something about a Lillipup and a Houndour, but I'm looking at your trainer info and it's not showing you as having any Pokemon, whatsoever. Is that right?"

Liam took a breath. He was prepared for this question. He had answered it in multiple job interviews, over the years. “That's correct, sir. I don't have any partner Pokemon."

Bruce turned his head to meet Liam's gaze. “But... you're a trainer."

“I was a trainer," Liam replied, shaking his head. “I started on the Pokemon Journey when I was ten, and I retired from the circuit just before I turned twelve. My Pokemon were all released to the wild and I haven't officially owned one for about ten years."

“Interesting." Bruce's expression was probing. Questioning. Liam was surprised to learn, however, that it lacked a certain air of judgment, which he had come to expect from interviews. Bruce looked back to the screen, a moment, and probed further. “It says here you only managed to acquire one badge. Can I ask why you retired?"

Liam, again, was prepared to field this question. He trotted out the usual half-truth. “Health concerns. It turned out I have chronic issues that made the rigors of the circuit very difficult. Most jobs with the League require only the one badge, so..."

Bruce held up a hand. “You don't need to say any more. I shouldn't have asked. Forgive me for prying; you know the saying about curiosity and Meowths."

“Oh, no, that's all right."

There was almost a hint of relief in Bruce's face, as he made a move to change the subject. “Right, well... this isn't a League affiliated business, so we don't really use badges as an aptitude measure. The only thing that matters is whether you can work with the Pokemon we have on site." Distractedly, he opened a drawer on his desk and pulled out a hard candy in a paper wrapper. “I'm going to want to test your talents a bit, just in case there's creatures you can't talk to."

“Okay?" Liam shook his head. “I-I mean, of course, sir. I don't see that being a problem."

“Great." Bruce smiled, faintly. How much that smile was directed at Liam, and how much it was directed at the freshly opened sweet between the man's fingers, was something that Liam was not qualified to answer. For the next long while, Bruce spoke around the small round ball, that sat in his cheek. “As you can probably imagine, the Underground isn't your typical environment for Pokemon. Necessarily, many of our actors are put in vulnerable situations. Dangerous, even, at times. It is vital that we keep an eye on their well-being, and part of that is having people around who can understand them, and intercede if there's a problem."

Liam folded his arms, uncertainly. “Sorry, I... what kind of dangerous stuff are we talking about, here? Are the Pokemon fighting, or...?"

The silence that fell on the room was deep enough and sudden enough that Liam knew he had made a misstep. Bruce's eyebrows shot up, in confusion. He looked off to the side, in thought, and then back to Liam. Eventually, he spoke. “I... thought it would be obvious what I'm talking about. Did... did Jez not tell you what we do, here?"

“She said you guys 'do good work with Pokemon.' She didn't say much more than that."

Bruce's eyes narrowed. “Well, now I'm curious. You don't know what we do, but you're here for an interview anyway. What's going on, Liam? Is your job at the Poke Mart that bad, that you're willing to jump into anything else, sight unseen?"

Liam was silent.

The wheels turned in Bruce's head. If the look of slowly dawning horror on his face was any indication, he was not a fan of where those wheels were taking him. “Liam? Are you... still working at the Poke Mart?"

Liam exhaled through his mouth, shaking his head reluctantly. “N-no, sir. I was fired, just last night."

For a few grim moments, Liam was convinced that it was over. He had just confessed to hopping into an interview for a random job, the day after he was thrown out of his last job. Liam waited for the inevitable; follow up questions he couldn't answer, awkward looks he would have to endure.

Instead, Bruce leaned back in his seat, and sighed. “What did she do?"

“What?" Liam flinched, at the question. “She...? She didn't do any... I-I-I don't know who you're talking about." As memories of his encounter with Jezebel came roaring back into his mind, he was suddenly very keenly aware of the fact that he was in a room with the Lopunny's trainer. His mouth tried, flailingly, to feign innocence, even as the rest of his face all but burst into flames.

It did not take any special talent for reading to understand what was going on in Liam's mind. Fortunately for him, Bruce's attention was on other things. “I should have known," the older man muttered to himself. “I just should have known. Oh, Giratina's tits, this is just like the staff party, last year." Moving quickly, Bruce leaned to one side and fished a phone out from his pocket. Rattling his thumbs against the screen, he put it to the side of his head. “Yeah, Reggie? I need to talk to Jezebel, like right now. Is she... okay, she's still on set? She's..." Distractedly, Bruce checked his wristwatch. “Oh, wow, she's still down there with Zero? Didn't they start, like... yeah. Yeah, yeah, no. I get it. All right, look, I'm coming down. Make sure she doesn't go anywhere, if they wrap between now and the next five minutes, okay? Thanks." Standing up, he stuffed the phone back in his pocket, rushing for the door. “All right. You're with me."

“I am?" Liam looked up, equal parts confused and distrustful. “What's going on? What are you doing?"

Bruce stopped, hand on the handle, and looked Liam in the eye. If it was at all possible, the man seemed to be wrestling with an even greater sense of guilt and embarrassment than Liam could manage. “Look," he said, “it's all right. Whatever happened between you and Jez, I'm sorry it got you fired. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened, but my Lopunny isn't really one to weigh the consequences of her actions. I promise, there is work here for you if you accept it." He motioned for the door. “However, you should probably get a chance to see what we do, before you make any sort of decisions. You coming?"

The look on Liam's face was about equivalent to the face one would make if they were sitting on a bomb that was emphatically not blowing up. He said nothing, in response. Instead, his legs responded for him by throwing him to his feet, and following close behind. Their trip took them down the hall and back into the lobby. Grey offered a wave and a smile. She withdrew both of those when she saw the two of them, marching past her desk with a look like they had just been to war. Instead, she followed them with their eyes, as they walked a full circuit around her desk and through the door opposite the one that led to the offices.

Beyond that door, whatever simple illusion of an office the company had put together faded away. Liam stepped through and was immediately dumped into a large, concrete-floored warehouse. The space was partitioned into about a dozen different miniature sets, each with lights and cameras and different themes of furnishings. Liam counted at least a dozen humans, and several dozen Pokemon, all busy at work. As for what they were working on...

Over on a large bed with red satin sheets, a Jolteon was stretched out on her back. Her front paws were over her face, bashfully trying to cover her eyes, even as her back legs were splayed wide open. Above her, a tired looking cameraman pointed his lens down, taking multiple shots focused on the spade-like vulva plumping out from her sharp yellow fur. Just behind the man, a Flareon and Espeon were raucously cheering their friend on, trying to cajole her into really playing to the camera..

Inside a set made to look like one corner of a boxing ring, with stands behind it, a Machoke showed off various different flexes. A human man and woman, dressed in singlets, hung off of whatever part of the large, muscular lizard-man they could grab onto, in a pantomime of wrestling holds. The humans always seemed to arrange themselves in such a way to cover up the fact that Machoke's belt and briefs seemed to be very much missing, by the time the camera flashes came.

A young woman, completely nude, sat in a chair made of hay bales. A Rapidash between her legs was pretending to lap at her waiting sex. He was not actually doing it: Liam had a good enough view to see that the fiery horse's muzzle was not moving at all. That, of course, didn't stop the tower of dark, hot horse member from drumming against the underside of his belly in poorly restrained excitement.

“Liam? Liam!"

He flinched. Looking where his name was being called, he found Bruce halfway across the room. Liam abortively started walking again, awkwardly sidling past a Growlithe and the half-naked human man he led on a leash to another set. By the time he had caught up, Bruce was pressing a button on the panel of a large industrial elevator.

Bruce looked back. He offered a sympathetic smile in Liam's direction. “I can see you've managed to figure out what we do, here."

Liam nodded, dumbly. “I'd heard about places, like this. I've..." He blushed. “... you know. Seen a couple things online."

“You might have even seen some of our stuff," Bruce replied, with a chipper smile. “Not that you'd know, since half the people who repost our content like to cut out any identifiers." With a grinding noise, the gate opened, and Bruce stepped inside. “We do the main work downstairs, where the acoustics are easier to manage."

“M-main work?" Liam felt a rising sense of dread, but not to a degree that would prevent him from getting in the elevator. “You mean, like... shooting videos, right?"

“Yup. It's definitely one of the more involved parts of this operation, but it's the one you're most likely to know us from."

A thought occurred to Liam. He found himself voicing it before he could stop himself. “Wait. Is this... you know, legal?"

For a moment, there was no response. The elevator rumbled around them as it began its slow descent. Then, Bruce snapped to attention. “Of course it is," he replied. “Why wouldn't it be? Pornography is legal, and Pokephilia..." He scratched his cheek, absently. “...well, it's not explicitly _il_legal. Mostly what stops operations like ours is the ethical concerns."

“What do you mean?"

“I mean consent, Liam. There've been a lot of horror stories out there, about people abusing their Pokemon. People think that because they 'own' their Pokemon, and these creatures are usually physically strong and resilient, then that means that trainers can just... you know, do whatever they feel like."

“Oh." Liam folded his arms, uneasily. “Right. Okay. So that's... that's why you want guys like me?"

“We need advocates, Liam," the older man replied, with a sudden sense of gravity. “People who can speak for the creatures in our care, and look out for their well-being." With a sudden lurch, the elevator stopped. The gate lifted, revealing a dark hallway that stretched out before turning in two directions. Bruce smirked at Liam. “Also, humans tend to be better at operating the film equipment. We'll be teaching you to perform basic crew tasks, while we find a production niche for you."

The hallway was lined with doors. On top of each door was a single red light bulb in a cage. A handful were lit, as Bruce and Liam made their way towards their destination; these and the light from the elevator cabin provided the only light. Then the gate closed, and the world was dark and red. Liam once again found himself dealing with a bout of anxiousness, his mind racing as he followed along behind his new boss.

A second thought occurred to him, at that precise moment. “Wait..." his face darkened, as recognition finally hit. “Did you say Zero is down here?"

“Yeah," Bruce answered. “You recognize that name?"

“Oh, jeez..." Liam was so distracted, he almost bumped into Bruce as the man stopped at one of the lit doors. “There's no way. You guys have Zero, here? Like, Zero the Lucario? Zero the Demon Lucario?"

In the dim light of the red bulb, Bruce smirked. “Oh, so you're a fan of his."

It was possible that the monochrome lighting would help cover up how incandescently red Liam's face got, at that. It was just possible. No amount of colored lights, however, could hide the octave and a half his voice jumped as he stammered out “W-w-what?! Don't be silly! I didn't... I've just seen..."

“Hey." Bruce's voice was quiet, but firm. Liam found himself quieting down immediately, in the face of that serious glare. The older man pointed up to the light and explained “When these are on, it means someone's filming. There's no talking on set, when the cameras are rolling. Understand?"

Liam nodded, his face still radiating heat.

“Good. I'm going to open the door, now."

Bruce pushed the door open with a slow, practiced motion to avoid any noise. When he did so, three things spilled out into the hallway. The first was the warm white of professional lighting rigs. The second was the max-volume, full-throated screams of a rabbit in the throes of ecstasy. The third was an intangible feeling, an inescapable aura of sex and power that washed over Liam with so much force, it was a wonder that he was not thrown off of his feet.

At the front of the room, a semicircle of human and Pokemon crew members watched the events unfolding in the back of the room with the sort of professional detachment that only extended immersion could provide. Further in was a battery of lights, illuminating one half of a luxurious looking bedroom. Yet more lights filtered in through the “windows," causing the area just beyond the cameras to look like it was at the height of a sunny, mid-summer's day.

Atop the large bed at the very back of the room, Jezebel the Lopunny could be seen. She had, at one point, been on all fours, but some time before Liam and Bruce arrived the strength had faltered in her arms, and now she found herself face down on the sheets. The expression on her face was of a rabbit almost entirely unrecognizable from anything Liam had seen, just a short while ago. She was disheveled, eyes unfocused, mouth open in dumb, drooling rapture. Her fingers dug into the white sheets, clinging on for dear life lest the assault taking place against her raised backside toss her onto the floor. Not that she was in any hurry to escape her assailant. Not if the half-legible noises that continued to issue from her was any indication.

Behind her, of course, was her assailant. A tall, bipedal blue-and-black jackal drove his hips into her with enough force to send ripples through the soft fur of her hindquarters. He glared down at her, with an expression too placid to be rage, but too feral to be anything else. The faintest hint of froth escaped from the corner of his clenched teeth. He had no words for the gibbering pile of fur beneath him. He made no noise whatsoever, aside from the sound his body made when it drove itself home again and again. Even so, there was still that feeling, that aura of power and dominance. It rolled off his body like steam, lifted the hair-like tendrils at the back of his head.

For most of the creatures on the other side of the light fixtures, this was mundane and endurable. The director, in his seat, shuffled to adjust the bulge in his pants. The woman behind the camera rubbed her thighs together, but kept her eye trained on the viewfinder. A Kadabra, holding the boom mic in place with his telekinesis, let his thin erection hang out in the open, a look on his face like he was very much ready to clock out. Bruce put his hands in his pockets as he walked into the room, as casually as if he was walking into a meeting room in mid-presentation.

For Liam, however, the sight and the sound and the ineffable feelings were altogether too much. He found himself frozen in place, heart hammering in his chest, barely able to blink. He had seen countless videos of Zero, seen the savagery he could bring when the cameras were rolling. Those experiences had, however, been behind the safety of a computer screen. It was a different matter entirely to see it in the flesh. Liam kept his hands up at his chest. He did not dare trust what they would do if they were allowed to go anywhere else.

Suddenly, there was a noise of strain in the back of the Lucario's throat. The director, sensing the subtle shift in the air, tapped the camerawoman's arm to make sure she was paying attention. She did not need the nudge, because she was already tightening the focus on the lens. With an anxious shudder, Zero pulled his cruel, blood-red, knotted cock out of Jezebel and sawed it upwards into the cleft of her soft cheeks. It twitched, shuddered, and then began to spit. Zero snarled and growled, as he began to paint Jezebel's back with streaks of hot, pent up seed.

For a while, things were suddenly quieter. Nothing but the insensate gasps of the Lopunny could be heard. Then, suddenly, the director yelled out “Okay, cut! Cut! We got it! Riley, you got it?"

The camerawoman gave a thumbs up, as she pulled her eye off of the viewfinder.

The director leaned back in his seat with a sigh. “Oh, thank fuck. All right! Pack it in and think of baseball, everyone. We're done here."

Zero hopped off the bed, his still-erect cock wagging up and down in the motion, as he glared down at Bruce. “You guys broke my concentration!" he accused, bitterly. “I could have kept going if it wasn't for your auras screwing things up."

Bruce checked his watch. “You've been down here filming for three hours, Zero. You can't be trying to set a personal best every time we film you."

Zero made a petulant noise, paws folded in front of his chest. “Whatever. Who's the new human?"

Liam, dumbstruck, was only half paying attention. At the moment, he watched as Kadabra walked a bottle of water over to the bed, where Jezebel was currently writhing about in love-drunk delirium. His eyes eventually fell back towards Zero, and when they did he found they could go nowhere else but down. Zero's cock was red, and angry. The knot had inflated, and it seemed to be indignant that it had nothing but cold air around it. Liam found himself wondering if that cumshot he saw was the real thing, or if there was something far more devastating waiting in those heavy blue nuts.

Zero scowled at Liam, then turned to Bruce and said “You can tell him that if he doesn't stop panting like a bitch in heat, I'm going to make him my new fluffer."

Liam flinched, face once again going red. “Oh, jeez! I-I'm sorry, Mister Zero. I didn't mean to stare, it's just..."

Zero's eyes widened. He looked into Bruce's eyes, questioningly.

Bruce chuckled. “Turns out you can tell this particular human, yourself."

“Hmmph." Zero turned to Liam and got in close. Liam could feel the heat from between the canine's legs, and from his breath on Liam's ear. “You'd better adjust quick," Zero whispered, darkly. “I don't want your crappy virgin aura messing up my concentration, ever again."

Liam swallowed, nervously, but said nothing in response.

Zero brushed past, deliberately checking the human with his shoulder. “I'm going somewhere to center," he announced, throwing the studio door open. “Nobody disturb me!"

Liam watched the Lucario leave. His heart pounded in his chest.

Bruce put a hand on his shoulder. “You doing all right?"

“It's..." Liam shook his head. “...it's all a bit much, is all."

“Understandable." Bruce took his hand off of Liam's shoulder and put his hands in his pockets. “The Underground can be pretty intense, sometimes. It's a pretty serious decision, working for us. Nobody'd blame you for deciding it's not for you."

Liam shuffled on his feet, a moment. His eyes moved from the empty door where Zero was, to the Lopunny currently wiping herself off with a towel on the bed. Then, he looked to Bruce and said “I... wouldn't say that, exactly."

Bruce smiled. “Great. Don't worry; we'll ease you into the job. I'll go ahead and get you the paperwork in a second." He sighed, turning towards the bed. “After I deal with Jez, of course."

Jezebel turned her head in their direction. Recognition caused her face to light up, and she waved enthusiastically. “Hey! Is that the Mart guy? Ohmigosh, hi! You, like, made it and stuff! Did you see my performance, just now? Are you going to be coming to work with us? Huh? What's up, Master? Your face is all, like, serious and junk."