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Joined in Mind and Body

Chapter 13

Somewhere in the Shadows, several beings conferred in silence.

"Do we have to do this? Isn't there any other way?" Faria asked, distressed.

"You know your pairmate looked at every possibility, and found no other way," another answered her.

Faria missed having fingers to wring. "What if it goes wrong? It could mean the end of everybody. Oh, I wish Karistin could help with this and make sure."

"He needs to keep his energies for his tasks ahead. He's already ready for our actions. Have faith. We don't want anything bad to happen any more than you," a friend comforted her.

"It worries me too, honestly. Never anything like this in all of my time here. I hope he reacts properly, or it's over."

Faria squelched her misgivings and shivered mentally. She missed being able to shiver in body as well too. But maybe that would change.

The group there got the signal, and began gathering up energy for the incursion into the physical realm. They would all be exhausted by this activity, and unable to do much for a long while themselves. And this could be the end of hope if it went badly. So many questions, so many new variables. All they could do was do what they had to do and hope the Light watched over them all.

* * *

Three Kats with one human aboard ran at a decent pace down the runway. Andrew had a growing feeling of foreboding and it seemed to have nothing to with the recent news. He hugged Serina tighter as they ran between Tyrin and Kelia. The feeling just wouldn't go away and it was only getting worse.

You must be strong. You must be swift. For everybody's sake, you must stay in control.

Andrew blinked as the whole feeling solidified in a snap. Everything happened suddenly, but to him it was as if it were in slow motion.

A saddlebag strap snapped off the back of a Kat who was running nearby, sending the bag slipping off hir to fall to the ground, where it bounced and skidded. Tyrin noted it at the last instant and reacted, grabbing Andrew off Serina's back as he jumped, so Serina could jump to avoid it more easily. Signals of alert hit Serina from three directions, from Andrew, Tyrin, and from the Kat who had lost the bag.

But Serina was too distracted by the prior news. Her hind paws pushed off for a jump...

Both of hir forepaws collided with the bag and shi went into a front-first somersault. Andrew felt Tyrin starting to slow down and saw Kelia trying to intercept the Kat tumbling in the air. But it was too late.

Serina had the entire weight of hir body come down directly on hir head, hir forward momentum pulling hir upper body back as hir lowback came down on hir as well. Andrew felt the excruciating pain through their link as hir head was pulled between the ground of the runway and her body. Hir neck was broken in an instant and hir throat torn open as hir head was almost fully separated from hir body, only the muscles at the back of hir neck staying intact as hir lowbody finally collapsed to the side, removing the pressure.

Andrew was gasping for breath and reality himself as he thrashed wildly, breaking Tyrin's grip on him and tumbling to the floor of the runway tube. There was a snap as his ankle gave way from the landing, but he ignored it as he scrambled madly for his beloved mate, feeling hir mind slipping away slowly. Hir eyes flicked to cover him, for they were the only thing that could still move, though hir vision was fading as quickly as hir mind. He could feel nothing but desperate sadness and pain from hir... and from himself. In fact, the whole ship felt the explosive effects of this incident, as Kats across the ship dropped like puppets.

Andrew tried to hold back his panic as he gazed at hir rapidly-bleeding out life. She would be dead within seconds though! But he had to be strong. He had to be swift. He had to stay in control...

You have ten seconds...

His mind flashed back to a strange feeling of déjà vu... why did this remind him so badly of the pair testing? His entire focus went to Serina, the sudden alarms in the ship not even registering as his eyes met hirs. Hir eyes were glazing already. Andrew reached into the depths of his power and into his memories.

Serina was already too far gone for him to use their link to draw power! What could he do? "Seri...!!" He heard Kelia cry out in shock from where shi lay on the ground nearby.

You have power within you... You have three seconds...

Desperately he reached deep into himself. Instinctually his mind traveled paths, found capabilities, and reached out with power. Time seemed to slow down even further. Tendrils of energy reached from him, surrounding the tiny Kathari, but he was not aware of them.

His awareness flowed into her body. His energies found the problems, and repaired them swiftly. Broken bones and cartilage, ripped flesh, moved by psionic forces and drawn to repair. Cells in marrow energized to replicate at rates millions of times their norm, replacing lost blood content as psionic energy ripped at the very fabrics of the universe to bring subatomic particles into being that were previously not there. Water and salt were formed, carriers for the new blood cells flooding into the system.

Serina's throat pulled itself back together with agonizing slowness to his point of view. Psionic energy gathered up the spilled blood, filtering and sorting out what should be in it and what shouldn't, and drew it back into hir body. Shi would have an excess of blood for a short moment, but his energies took care of that quickly as well. Nerves were repaired and reconnected as hir spine was put back to rights and the gaping tear in hir neck finally closed.

The main injuries dealt with, Andrew's energy swept through his love's body and making all of the necessary minor adjustments. Capillary beds that had gone into a shock state were reset, chemicals throughout hir system returned to normal, neuron potentials were reset, cells repaired, even at the most base levels.

Final adjustments were made to hir system to bring it back into a balanced condition, then his energies wrapped around the little Kat's body and exerted inertialess kinesis. Andrew stood up carefully as his energies lifted hir from the ground and carefully set hir on hir feet. He felt like he was slogging through thick goo instead of air, his body just didn't want to respond properly until an offshoot of his energy rippled through him as well, energizing him and allowing him to move normally.

It was no good! All that work to repair hir body had taken a good two minutes at least! There was no response from hir at all as his kinesis carefully set hir on hir feet. Andrew felt complete despair as he reached out to hir with his mind, knowing he would find nothing there.

"Andrew?" shi sent quaveringly. Andrew's jaw dropped and he leaped to hir side, throwing his arms around hir. She felt strangely stiff for a moment. Even hir fur was stiff and uncomfortable. Then his energies finally released hir body and his with a flash of power and hir fur softened as shi stumbled against him slightly.

"..na!! ACK! Wha...?!" Kelia exclaimed from the ground nearby. Kats all over in the runway tube were picking themselves up off the floor as klaxons continued to sound all over the ship.

Serina grabbed him and hugged him wildly. "ANDREW!! Oh, darkness, I was so afraid! It hurt so badly! How...?" Hir hand went up to her throat while the other cupped the back of hir neck.

"How and what are both very good questions," Kelia murmured quietly to them. "I took charge and got a status report from the other Kats here to combine with what I saw..." Shi reached out to their minds and sent a combined knowledge pool view of the event.

To everybody else's view, Serina had tripped and almost torn her head off. The massive psionic backlash of the event had affected all the Kats on the ship obviously. Andrew had gone to hir side in an instant and Kelia had called out "Serina!" But in the middle of Kelia's shout, there was a massive flash of psionic power around both of them, and suddenly they were standing there, with Serina upright and uninjured and Andrew holding hir.

Andrew shook his head. "I spent at least three minutes working on healing hir..." he murmured. The klaxon cut off and Kats dusted themselves off and resumed travel. Serina nabbed Andrew and placed him on hir back, then shi took of in the direction of home without a word. Tyrin and Kelia exchanged glances and kept moving.

Andrew wrapped his arms around Serina, but shi seemed somewhat stiff and hir mind was closed to him. He began to get worried and sent a questing thought, but shi shunted it off. He just held her while they joined up with the main runways, and soon reached the exit.

Andrew tried to slide off Serina's back when they were walking up the hallway, but she grabbed his arms and kept them tight around herself, so he couldn't let go to slide off. They walked up the hallway until it opened out into the road, and around the corner where the bar was that Andrew had first seen hir. Andrew noticed hir glance at the bar, then shi took off at a trot. Kelia and Tyrin broke into their own trots to keep up.

Soon they headed up the ramps and into their home hallway. Serina slowed to a walk again. Andrew felt hir shaking slightly. "Serina?" he asked quietly.

Just before they reached their door, shi released his arms and hir hands flew to hir face as shi started bawling. Andrew jumped off hir back and scampered around in front of hir to grab hir and hold hir. Shi buried hir face against his neck as shi cried, hir arms flying around hir mate as shi clung to him desperately. Andrew threw a desperate glance at Tyrin and Kelia, who both shrugged helplessly and stayed back a ways.

"Andrew-t'rus! I've never been so afraid in my whole life! I knew I was dying, and so fast too. I knew it was the end and that I was losing you. And then you saved me. I don't know how, but you saved my life again," shi sobbed. "I... I feel like there is nothing I can ever do to make up for how much you have done for me. I feel so insignificant..." Shi stopped crying, and whispered, "So small..."

"Hush..." Andrew murmured, stroking hir back. "You know I would die for you and die without you, I love you that much. I would do anything to save you, a hundred times over. You know all I want in return is to have you here and have you love me." He leaned back and caught hir chin with his fingertip, making hir look up at him. "And you're just the perfect size for me in all ways. That's proof we were meant for each other from the start."

Shi gazed at him for a moment, then almost bit his face off in hir desperation to kiss him. He survived the attack with no problem, as the kiss turned more passionate and slowly became more gentle. They broke off with both of them panting. Shi smiled slightly. "I hope I am never that afraid again," shi murmured, and reopened hir link to him.

He was ready for this and flooded hir with all the adoration, all the love, and all the devotion he had for hir in one swell foop. Shi gasped in delight. If shi ever forgot how much he loved hir, this was a good way to remind hir. Shi got a hungry look in hir eye and a desire in hir loins for some serious loving. Andrew blinked.

"Love... You're leaking badly, and we're still in the hallway..." he murmured to hir.

Shi blinked, going out of hunter focus and looking around. Two Kats that were further down the hall were rushing to get out of range of the powerful sexual tension leak and Tyrin and Kelia were fidgeting with full erections just a short ways away. "Oh, sorry!!" shi exclaimed, slapping hir shields back up properly. Both of their friends relaxed immediately as they were able to withdraw themselves back into their sheaths. Andrew breathed a sigh of relief.

"Let's head in... We've got lot to discuss and I promise you some serious fun later, trus," Andrew said, tapping the door control panel. The door slid open and they walked in... and stopped dead in their tracks, almost making Tyrin and Kelia trip over them.

There was a snow-white Kathari standing in their suite, wringing hir hands. The intruder blinked. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know you would have company, Andrew. I'll come back later," shi said. Then shi just vanished.

Andrew worked his jaw, but no sound came out. Serina disengaged from him and went over to inspect the area where the other Kat had been standing. Andrew finally joined hir. "What...? Something about that Kat was familiar somehow."

"That wasn't a Kat," Serina said, spinning to look at him. "There was no psionic signature at all. No shielding. No living mind here. Not even the smell of a Kat. Or anything else for that matter."

"Andrew..." Tyrin said from near his suite com unit. Andrew glanced over and noted the softly glowing green light on the com panel. He walked over curiously and accessed the com. The green light indicated that the holo projection system for the suite had been activated. Andrew frowned. He knew he hadn't activated it. It usually required a security team to activate. Or at least very high clearance.

He concentrated and bypassed the standard interface on the com, inspecting the system directly with his mind. There had been a remote activation. That's odd. He traced the backlogs and the source, his mind ranging through the ship in ways that he never could do just from direct com input. The source of the remote activation was horrendously obfuscated and tried to mislead any tracing. His awareness sailed through circuitry and systems and ran into a bit of a barrier. He shook his head and skirted past the barrier.

And he found himself in the ENEGMIS core.

With a gasp, he withdrew his mind from the system. "I think that was Sybelle," he said. "And it looks like she activated the holo projectors remotely herself."

"Please don't tell anybody."

All four of them spun to see the same white Kat standing there, looking worried. The white Kat sat down. "I've been through enough trouble with my recent malfunction. I don't want to end up in more trouble for overriding things. But I was desperate." Sybelle looked up to see them all staring. "Oh... I'm sorry... Andrew, I'll stay out until you are finished with your company." The computer projection vanished again.

"The... ISABEN... was desperate to see you, Andrew?" Tyrin said. "I didn't know the computer could even have emotions like that."

Andrew shook his head in wonderment. "Normally it shouldn't be able to. But the ENEGMIS core was being affected by psionic background noise from the Kathari on the ship. Same dreaming of sex thing I had the first nap I took. I'm really wondering about side effects."

Kelia sighed. "Well, we have to deal with the more immediate issue first. Making it safe to reveal..." Shi blinked and looked around, then continued telepathically, "...reveal to the humans that you are psionic. And of course with a computer listening in here, I don't feel comfortable talking."

"No worries," Andrew sent. "Now, why do they think they would kill me for testing? I mean, they can do plenty of tests without any harm to me, and then I'd be done."

"Not all humans in command are as friendly as the ones on this ship. Some are downright scared of us," Kelia sent with a sigh. "They would determine you to be a potential threat and also a way to have their very own psionic cadaver. Something they could never have with a Kat. You would be a lab rat at best, even if you were not killed straight out as a potential threat."

Andrew shivered as he realized that what they said was true. Humanity had always had problems like that. "So what do we do about it?"

"You need to get legally clan-bonded to your mate's clan," Tyrin sent. "Then you will be a Katarus citizen by our laws and we have full jurisdiction over you. The humans wouldn't be able to do anything negative to you at that point without creating a major incident. Given your importance to us, believe me, the incident would be seriously major."

Andrew nodded, then realized that Serina was leaking a bit of shock. He looked at hir. "Everything okay?"

Shi shook hir head to clear it. "To get clan-bonded, you'd need my parent's permission. And you would gain my clan name, Alathir, in place of your own clan name, Foster. And we'd have to go through a ceremony..."

"Well, you always did say that your parents were on your side, so hopefully they'll accept me. I'm not too worried about my last name." Andrew chuckled. "My parents can deal with the news when I get back to Terra. And a ceremony doesn't sound too bad. Kind of like a wedding, yes?"

Serina shook hir head, this time to disagree. "I've read about your weddings. All nice and happy and such. We do have a celebration at the end of the ceremony. But the ceremony itself involves at least a dozen clan members, up to any number of the ones present, trying to prevent you from getting to me. Physically. They won't try to hurt you, but they will try to stop you. And you're not allowed to use psionics against them. You can only use psionics within your own body and they are allowed to only use psionics to counter any psionics you use, not directly against you."

Shi looked at him. "You get one day to find me and reach me across the plains, or you do not get into the clan. And you only get one try ever." She made a face as if she were about to cry again. "Oh, Andrew! If they just knock you over and put a paw on you, they can hold you down with no problem! And you can't run as fast as a Kat even! And you don't have our keen senses to try to avoid them! And..." She looked embarrassed. "Humans are REALLY easy to smell and track. No offense, trus."

Andrew winced at the news. He looked at Tyrin and Kelia. "Is there any other way? Or any way to avoid this... gauntlet thing?" Both shook their heads grimly.

Andrew closed his eyes and hung his head. How the heck was he going to get past this hurdle?

"We have a drop ship leaving for Katarus in an hour, which Serina will be aboard," Tyrin sent. "You will be snuck on board with hir, Andrew, with the full cooperation of the consulate. It is for two days of administrative leave, for Kathari issues. You will have that time and that time alone to get her parents' permission and undergo the ceremony officially, and then be back. We'll cover for you while you're gone."

"Serina, we need to take you shopping for something to cover your fur, so Andrew can ride you without ruffling it," Kelia observed. "We can get anything, since we just have to get it past the humans. The Kathari crew is all pre-informed and won't be a concern. Come on, we've got very little time."

Serina nodded. Shi kissed Andrew softly. "I'll be back soon, trus. We need to be ready in a half hour if the drop ship leaves in an hour." All three Kats turned and headed out the door to find a good way to take care of things, leaving Andrew alone to contemplate how to deal with the gauntlet thing.

Andrew sighed and dropped into the chair in front of the com, leaning back in it and closing his eyes as he tried to think of a solution. Hands met his shoulders and began to rub them lightly, but he was so deep in problem-solver mode that he didn't think anything of it. He did finally open his eyes in realization when Sybelle spoke quietly, "You're definitely stressed. Hey, why is the Kat, Serina Alathir, assigned to your quarters?"

Andrew blinked and spun in the chair to face the huge white Kathari computer projection. "Sybelle... What's up? You went to a lot of work to activate these projectors."

The Kat wrung hir hands. "Andrew, I'm worried. Which is part of what worries me in fact. I'm lonely, and I'm sad, and I'm happy, and I'm worried, and I shouldn't be able to be. I think maybe I need to be fixed more, but I'm afraid. And I shouldn't be able to be afraid either."

Andrew was at a loss. The computer was truthful there. It had organic components in the ENEGMIS core, but the neurons were very fine-tuned and the chemicals that created emotion of any sort were completely and utterly blocked. The ISABEN could EMULATE emotions when specifically told to, but it couldn't be emotional on its own.

"You said... You said that if I still wanted to mate with you... because I cared... that you would. I... I want to take you up on that offer." Andrew blinked, feeling a panic at the computer's words. Sybelle continued, "But it wouldn't work. No matter how much I want it to."

Andrew was somewhat relieved, but couldn't help but ask, "Why not?"

The Kat looked down at him, leaning from foot to foot. "Mating is a physical pleasure. It's... it's the result of stimulation of living flesh transmitting specific information to specific parts of the brain in ways that the brain defines as pleasurable. Since I have no real physical body, with real neurons spanning from flesh to my brain, I have no way of knowing how to direct the physical stimulation to my matrices."

Shi wring hir hands again. "I could define something as 'positive', but with no direct experience, I have no way of defining how something is pleasurable. Since I met you, I can feel emotional pleasure though. This is... completely new to me. I shouldn't be able to and I know it. But I like being around you. I find myself dedicating processing time to thinking random things about you. And I don't know what to do about it."

Andrew wasn't sure what to make of this situation. Sybelle sat down and sighed. "I'm not supposed to tell you this, but Andrew, you were the unknown node that day in the core. You're psionic, but you're not supposed to know it." Shi squinched hir eyes shut, prepared for an outburst and to get in trouble.

"I know," Andrew said with a chuckle. Sybelle blinked at him.

"Well, you definitely can't let the other humans know!" the computer exclaimed. "I went over every computable probability if they found out and none of the results were good. I'm pretty sure the humans on this ship would be fine, but the data I have about higher command does not allow for positive projections."

Andrew made a face. "I know that too."

The Kat caught his shoulders in hir hands and squeezed them lightly, "Oh, Andrew! I'm behind in telling you important things. I'm sorry. I wasn't sure, but... I care about you. I realized I really do. That's the only thing I can figure out, and believe me, I've put lots of thought into it. I reviewed everything that I got from your mind when you were linked. It was all so wonderful!"

The Kat dropped to hir belly in front of him and looked at him piercingly, hir lower jaw trembling. "Andrew... It frightens me to say this, but I think I love you. Andrew... Do I have a soul? When I die, will I go to the Shadows?"

Andrew reeled mentally. This was DEFINITELY not something he was prepared for.

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