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Shattered glass. Heavy thuds. Loud screams.

Kevin held Shaun close, trying to shake the fear off. His parents were arguing again. About what, he did not know. Nearly every time when his father came home drunk, his mother would tell Shaun to get him, hide in the closet, and not come out before she called them.

He was glad of that. Before that became a routine, his father would hit all three of them. Kevin always felt guilty to his father, that he had let him down. He would apologise all over to him; he would apologise for not getting good grades, he would apologise for speaking too loud, he would apologise for not wiping the floor clean enough, he would apologise for crying when his father hit him.

Right now, Shaun was holding him close, trying not to cry but failing. Kevin himself was on the verge of tears, but he held himself back. If his father knew, he could hit him again.

Another loud thud could be heard, this time against their bedroom door. Kevin couldn't see it through the small cracks in the closet. The voices became louder and he clutched at Shaun more. His brother was someone whom people feared at their school, but even he feared his father.

The noises stopped and they instinctively held back their sobbing to be more silent. Sometimes, his father would burst into the room and get them. This time, no one came. Shaun dared open the closet slightly and take a peek.

There was another thud, making them both jump and clutch each other. Shaun closed the closet again and whined, hiding Kevin in his hold. They were already behind the clothes inside the closet, but their fur colour still stood out.

Their tails clamped even closer to their bodies as they heard the bedroom door open. Kevin was on the brink of tears now, too afraid to cry but too afraid not to. Shaun was growling and his fur bristled, aggressively telling everyone to back away.

People said Shaun looked scary like this, yet Kevin still found the gesture comforting, nonetheless.

"Shaun, Kevin, c-come out now."

Hearing their mother's voice, they let their guard down. Shaun stopped growling and began sobbing instead. Kevin allowed his tail to wave slightly, still too afraid to do so. Shaun held him closer and sobbed into his fluff for a bit, then pushed him softly to exit the closet.

Kevin nervously opened the closet door, slowly coming out. Shaun still held his shoulder, his hands reassuring. The door was open and their mother was standing in it, beckoning them to come out. They slowly and silently walked to the door. Shaun now moved forward, hiding Kevin with his larger figure as they approached the door.

Taking a peek behind his brother, Kevin could see the living room in a mess. Glass pieces on the floor, furniture out of their places, cracks in the wall, they were all familiar sights, but still made him shudder every time he saw them. His mother was talking about something to Shaun, but his eyes were fixed on something battered on the floor.

It was the small clay sculpture he made yesterday at school for his father.

He held the back of his brother's t-shirt tight, and when he couldn't hold back his tears anymore, he cried. He spent so much time making that. His teacher said his father must love it, so why did he break it?

His mother and brother stopped talking, then he found himself in his mother's arms. "Ssh, it's okay, Kev. It's okay."

"B-b-but dad b-broke my s-scupture!"

Shaun growled.

"Ssh, how about you and Shaun get some ice cream?" His mother smiled and wiped his tears. "Shaun, go buy some ice cream with your brother."

"Yes, mom."

His mother put him down, then gave some money to his brother. Shaun gently pulled his tail to go outside. Meekly, he followed his brother, still sobbing softly.

"Stop whining!" Shaun told him when they were outside.

"B-b-but--"

"Stop it!" He said again, then pulled him into a hug. "Don't cry. I will protect you."

Kevin's sobbing softened, then he hugged his brother back, knowing that he would be safe.

---

I will protect you.

It was a long time ago. Back then, it sounded like a promise, like something sacred that would bind them together. It sounded like something to keep them safe from their father's disappointment.

How laughably naïve was his young self.

Now, fifteen years later, although he really, really wanted to say that he despised his brother with every fibre of his being, there was still something tying them together. Those words his brother uttered were meaningless now, so they were of no use. Now, the two things tying them together were their mutual hatred towards each other and their love for their mother.

With the shadow of their father still looming over them, he now almost felt nothing for his brother on the surface, yet deep down, he knew he still loved him and that he did not want him to leave. Kevin tried his best to get out of his father's shadow, to not follow his steps, yet during sleepless nights full of headache and regrets, he couldn't help but think of just how much damage his father did to him and his family. How he so readily accepted guilt, how he was not used to apologising in fear of being confronted by violence, and most importantly, how he learnt that strength begot survival.

He felt rather dismayed at himself for sleeping through most of the Introduction to Psychology class sessions, yet thankfully he could still pinpoint many of his problems to his father. Yet, whether it was merely out of spite and anger or whether it was really true, he did not know.

Getting off the bus, Shaun helped his mother get down even though she was perfectly capable of walking. She just had a check-up on her Alzheimer's. The doctor said it was improving--well, stagnating--but still, it was incurable. That was fine for Kevin, at least she would still be around when he finally bought her a new house, whenever that might be.

He really hoped she would still be around, whenever that might be.

The red wolf shook his head. Instead, he thought of Shaun. He could say that Shaun wasn't trying at all to improve their living condition, but he would be wrong. As only a high-school graduate, the lighter-red wolf could only apply to lower-position jobs. Not that he himself was better, though, but at least he had a much better chance of getting an office job.

Shaun? Not really.

Instead, his brother focused on the well-being of their mother. He was the one who kept her safe while Kevin went to Barrowisle for university. He was the one who guided their mother when her Alzheimer's was acting up. University here was much more affordable compared to other countries, but still, for them, it was something to dream about. Even Kevin had to work his arse off and sell himself sometimes just to pay the fee.

"Oi, fag, walk faster!"

"Shaun, watch your language!" His mother said.

He rolled his eyes. Yes, there was still that. Good thing they were in an empty street right now. He leant closer to his brother and said in a low voice, "At least don't call me fag when we're not home."

Shaun looked around, then his ears went down a bit. Good; at least some decency.

Kevin kicked a rock and huffed. Although he was glad that his mother was fine, that call still made him afraid. Two days ago, Shaun called him that their mother was having seizures. That really scared him and he quickly went here. As if that alone didn't put a dent in his wallet, the therapy earlier effectively emptied his wallet even though his family was covered by LFHT tier 1, leaving only a small wad for him to go back to Barrowisle.

He really wished he could become a full-timer instead. He asked his boss about that, but he said it wasn't a good enough time for that. At least he got a raise to fifty euros a day. Now, he had to get all the money back if he wanted to survive for the month.

The neighbourhood in which they lived was very much different from his place in Barrowisle. Here, in the outskirts of Ausalt-on-Haye, things were rather calm, relatively speaking. Ausalt-on-Haye was one of the busiest cities in the country, even more so than Barrowisle. In Barrowisle, there was always a sense of calmness despite the rush, but not here. He was glad he lived nowhere near the city centre.

Sometimes, he envied those who lived across the river in those rich neighbourhoods. The tops of their houses--maybe palaces--were visible from here, a small peek of life with seemingly no worries. Sometimes, he envied Octo and Vilkas. They seemed to not really have any worries.

Sometimes, he really just wanted to not think too much.

Kevin stared at the river, stopping and putting his hands in his jacket pocket. Back when he was little, he played in its banks, often just with Shaun or some more wolves. As he grew up, he noticed the sometimes-weird looks people threw at them, but he paid them no mind. Now, it seemed funny; few wolves here had fur so bright red like them.

At least, here in the suburbs was still better. Speciesist problems were more prevalent in the city itself. Besides, the wolf population here was negligible.

He huffed and kicked another rock, then continued his walk home.

He caught up with his brother and mother just when they were unlocking the door. Shaun opened the door, then went in. He led his mother right away to her room and made sure she was comfortable to rest. Kevin meanwhile took his jacket off and went to the kitchen, unpacking the raw chicken they bought. His mother would cook it later. For now, he bought them some Chick-er-ed.

Shaun then walked into the kitchen. "Where's mine?"

"Here."

They took their chicken pieces, then went to the living room to eat.

The air was awkward around them, only the sound of the television could be heard. Kevin really wanted to eat in peace, and it looked like Shaun did, too, but none of them really wanted to let go of the air from before. He let out a sigh and started eating.

His brother was one to break the silence. "So, uh, how's work?"

Kevin just shrugged, not looking at him. "The usual."

"Mrf."

"How's yours?"

"Still flipping burgers."

"Mrf."

Before the silence returned, he spoke up. "Y'know, uh," he trailed off. What was it that he wanted to say again? "how're you and that... uh... Margaret?"

Shaun looked at him strangely. "You know we broke up last month."

"Oh, right." He sheepishly answered, then shrugged. "Stupid straight."

"Eh, how many asses you fucked since you last came here, fag?"

"You don't want to know." Kevin said, already knowing what his brother's reaction would be. "Let's just drop it."

"You were the one who brought it up."

"Yeah and I wanna drop it."

Shaun snorted.

"Anyway, where's your part of the rent?"

"I'm working on it, okay?!"

Kevin rolled his eyes. "Your pay day should be yesterday, fuckface."

"I fucking know that!"

They went silent again. Kevin sighed and kept eating. It was really hard to keep the friendly air between them. Just one wrong word and they would be at each other's throat. He tried really hard, but it wasn't easy. He knew Shaun was trying too but failed just like him.

They were wolves, bonded by blood.

Times like this, he missed Tom. He really wished Shaun would be more like Tom, soft, understanding, yet still firm. Sometimes, he missed the old Shaun.

No use in wishing that. Shaun of now was not Shaun of old, so he should get used to it. At least, he should not provoke him, which could be hard to do since his brother's dictionary of expletives was more colourful than his.

"Knot-in-ass, how're you doing in Barrowisle?"

Yes... that was one example.

Kevin just shrugged. "Fine. Still in that cheap apartment. At least it's comfy there."

"You're not getting gangbanged there, right?"

He looked at Shaun funnily. Expecting a mocking grin or taunting snicker, he was instead surprised when his brother's face was serious. He furrowed his brows and watched him cautiously. "No."

"Good." Shaun gave out a relieved sigh.

"What was that?"

"Nothing."

"O... kay..." Done with the food, he stood up and went to the kitchen to put his empty plate away and wash his hands. He'd wash the dishes later. For now, he wiped his hands and went back to the living room chair, amazed by the fact that this might be the first time in a while they weren't at each other's throats after five minutes. Shaun was finishing his chicken too when he came back.

After experiencing what it felt to have a loving brother with Tom, he wanted to have the same with Shaun. Tom and Shaun were two different people, so he wasn't--shouldn't be--expecting the exact same thing, but at least he could have his brother again. He had to make this last.

"Anything happened lately?" He asked his brother as he sat back down.

Shaun just huffed. "The landlord came here to ask for payment a week ago."

Surprised, Kevin sat up straight and looked him in the eyes. "What?! Did anyone get hurt? You missed last month's pay?"

"No, just..." The light red wolf sat up and went to the kitchen.

"Just what? Get your hell tail here and spill!"

"Wait up, dumbfuck, I'm washing my hands." A few moments later, Shaun returned, out of his jacket. "Just, I didn't get the text." He pulled his fluff together and put a hairband on his fluff before sitting down on the chair, giving a heavy sigh. "My phone fucking broke and I forgot about the rent. The landlord just came here reminding me. I got the money, just forgot to pay it. No one got hurt, just a misunderstanding. Thank fuck Telewire can be used on computers so I could call you."

The red wolf facepalmed. He didn't usually call or text before he came here anyway. Also, despite their dislike of each other, they still had each other's phone numbers in case something went wrong. "Get a new phone. At least you can call me if something happens."

The light red wolf grunted. "I'm working on it."

They went silent after that. They just watched the television absent-mindedly. It was showing a sitcom. Neither of them really enjoyed it but it was a good distraction, nonetheless.

Their ears turned to Kevin's phone on the table when it beeped with a new text. The red wolf took his phone lazily and read it.

Octo babe: "Hey, how are you? Have you eaten yet?"

He let out an amused huff at that. That was kind of his fault, though; he hadn't texted the panther since yesterday morning when he arrived. He typed back his reply, "Yeah I just ate, sry was too busy w home stuff"

Octo babe: "It's okay. Say hello to your family from me :)"

He might tell that to his mother, but definitely not Shaun.

Octo babe: "I made some watermelon juice. Turns out it's more delicious than I expected."

Now he wanted some watermelon.

Eh, there was nothing he could do other than lazing around in his room, anyway. Maybe a trip around the city would be good for him to take the charge off. He stood up and stretched a bit, then took his jacket on the hanger and walked outside. "Imma go get some fresh air."

Shaun just mrf'ed an affirmation.

---

That was not the fresh air he wanted to get.

Limping, Kevin walked home. The night was getting older, making him feel glad that there was no one to see him like this. His muzzle was leaking blood, his entire body aching. Tail hanging limp, he could only cringe to hold back the pain.

His house was just a short distance away. At least now in his neighbourhood, things were safe... relatively. While there were some unfriendly neighbours, at least there were no thugs who could beat him even more. Good thing they didn't take anything from him.

Finally reaching his house, Kevin opened it and turned the living room lamps on. He went to the kitchen, washing his muzzle first. He winced as the water stung, then sighed as it lessened. There were no slashes or bruises on his arms and body, which he was thankful for. Dried blood stains were hard to wash, especially on his white-furred front body.

He took a glass of water, then gargled and spat it to get the blood out. He did that a few more times before finally drinking the water and leaning heavily on the counter, head spinning.

He wasn't even sure his arms could support his weight for long.

"Shit, what happened?" Someone asked. Kevin didn't need to turn to know that it was Shaun.

He straightened up and looked at his brother. "No... none of your business."

Shaun looked like he wanted to help him but held back. Good, don't fucking help me. Instead, he just stood there, expression flat. Kevin didn't expect him to help, anyway. That would be so weird. He had caught Shaun coming home like this a lot of times, too, even at times he contemplated helping him or not.

He moved aside from the counter and locked the front door, then walked away towards his room. As he did so, he could feel the intense stare Shaun was giving him. Heh, weak-ass, he thought before cringing as his leg threatened to give up.

Admittedly, it felt good to pick fights again. It made him feel... worthy, capable.

Closing the bedroom door, he sat down on the bed and took some tissues, then put them on his nose. Slowly lying on the bed, he gritted his teeth as his body protested. It hadn't really been a very good day today, but at least he managed to talk with Shaun for more than ten minutes without strangling each other. That made him smile.

That smile faded quickly. Now, with his body aching all over, he could only lie on the bed and slowly drift to sleep, dreaming of those foregone days when everything was still simple.

---

I think "chapter 33 warning" is going to be a regular thing.