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Away

Part three of three

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Written by Arian Mabe (Amethyst Mare)

Commissioned by Adagiodajiang

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Alyssa

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Thirteen months after Sandor had left, Alyssa still tried, still kept hope that he was going to return, even though people talked about her in town. They said that she was foolish, that she was waiting around for a mage who was never coming back for her, that he had found someone else, that he was clearly off on grand quests elsewhere. At first, she had struggled and fought and refuted them verbally, finding her stride, her boldness, her confidence. It all was born from her love for him, after all, so it had been easy to draw on.

And it should have remained easy, well and truly, despite everything. Only, Alyssa changed how she spoke to people, carrying on with her life and quest to wait for Sandor, to find out what had happened to Sandor, to bring Sandor home, with quiet determination. She smiled at the shopkeepers and made small talk with merchants, even found a centaur woman that she could laugh with and drink ale with, taking company. But she only spoke about Sandor with those that might have been able to help her, with a purpose and intent in mind.

Kneeling in the middle of the field of flowers, Alyssa exhaled softly. Despite the seriousness of the situation, a soft smile pulled at her lips. Maybe, this time, she would be able to find out what had happened to Sandor, where he was. With all that he had sent her, she would surely be able to enlist someone to travel with her, for protection and guidance. Maybe that had been why he had sent her the beryl in the first place?

There was no way to tell, except from the lips of the fox.

"Oh, wise wolf, Avonne," she breathed, her head bowed respectfully, one leg kicked out before her as she knelt and bowed. "Please... Please divine where my partner is, Sandor, Sandor the mage."

The wolf surveyed her, standing tall despite her age. She should have been more wizened than she was, truly, considering the lines of age around her eyes, the grey of her fur, where she had been born black. Her eyes, however, remained a shocking amber, as bright as they had been the very day she had been born. Her dark nose was still moist with good health, though she had fewer teeth in her mouth than she had had a few years ago. A few missing teeth, however, were not so much of a difficulty for those that had many coming to them with goodwill and support in the form of money and food.

The wolfess, Avonne, too was a diviner, someone who could divine events happening far away, even seeing into some paths of fate, the illnesses held by the body... Actually, Alyssa did not understand, fully, the deeper meaning of all that she did, the full extent of the magic that lay in the wise wolf's veins, but she knew that she was someone, potentially, who would be able to help her.

That was why she was there in the field, settling the deer part of her body down to the grass, feeling the blades tickle her stomach. Spring had come, though the long, long winter had been unforgiving with her lover gone. Those had been the darkest of days, wishing for him, longing for him, only wanting him to be there, with her, always with her.

But spring, yes... It had come and the light of the day was upon her as she bowed her head, the wolfess kneeling too, her lips pressed together. Alyssa did not stare at her, however, not wanting to watch her at work, not wanting to be rude. Magic, for many, was a very private affair. Those that spent their time training in private, learning quietly, had a different way about it than most mages that Alyssa had come across.

"Mmm... Speak of his name, allow me to reach."

The wolf's field held an astrolabe, a globe-like object made of many spheres, many rings, that all turned and slotted into one another. They were what could help focus her magic, guiding her in divining. The golden-bronze of the old, old metal, infused with magic, caught Alyssa's eye and she glanced at it curiously, Avonne the diviner turning it, her fingers glittering in a flicker of subtle magic.

"Sandor, mage, a white fox with no markings..." Alyssa's heart pulled, though she bid it to lift, to understand the passion that she had held for her lover all this time. "Born twenty-five years hence, the sixth month of the year and the seventh day... A merchant's son from Ergias town."

"Thank you, my child."

Alyssa did not feel all that young, not considering her species and the swift rush of her kind towards the end of their days, but she didn't say anything, merely keeping her head respectfully bowed. The tug in her heart towards the wolfess was strong, drawing her there, holding her there, hope, as always, burning.

She'd never lost hope. And, she never would.

"Hm... This is interesting, I've never found a divination reading quite like this one before."

Alyssa's head picked up.

"What?"

She had hardly dared to believe that the wise wolfess would have something for her, despite her faith. There was a difference, of course, between having hope that, one day, all would be resolved, and, of course, thinking that the moment had finally come, that she would have all the answers.

Or perhaps only some of them.

She shook her head, barely daring.

"Wise wolf Avonne? What do you mean? Please - tell me!"

She couldn't keep the furtive edge of desperation from her tone, though there was no one in the world, quite honestly, who would have blamed Alyssa for that.

Avonne was silent, however, noting down the information with a quill, on an unfurled scroll. Everything she saw was recorded, for which Alyssa was grateful.

The wolf looked at the astrolabe again, following the line of numbers with the tip of her scroll.

"I do not understand what I am reading," she said, at last. "But your partner, Sandor... He is in a good state, he is alive."

Alyssa let out a breath that she had not realised she'd been holding. No wonder her chest had been so tight, anticipation and tension lining her body, forcing muscles that she didn't even think about normally to contract.

"That is good... But what is strange about it? What do you see?"

"I read..." The wolf corrected her. "I read that his location... I should be able to tell where it is, but, though he is alive, he is buried, buried in the ground."

Alyssa swallowed, a cold wash pushing through her.

"Yes... But..." Avonne seemed to be pondering. "And...the reading is changed. I've never seen anything like this before. It is as if... No, he has disappeared. The ground... I read only the ground, the ground, the ground..."

Avonne muttered to herself - and Alyssa could keep herself on the ground no longer. What was it that the wolfess saw? What did she read through her magic? The metallic whir and metallic flick of the astrolabe was infuriating! If she had something to say, then why didn't the diviner just say it?

"Is he dead? Has he now been killed?" Oh, she had to know, had to, one way or the other. "Please - don't hold it back from me! I need to know!"

Alyssa tried to come forward, up on her cloven hooves, though there was something there, a branch or a root, something tangled around her hind hoof. She muttered under her breath. It was not the time for such things, something as small and as simple as a root getting in her way!

She grunted, fighting to break free, but it was not easy, not as she twisted away and stomped, the tightness around her hoof too snug to merely tug herself free.

Snap!

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There, that had to be done, she thought to herself, but the wolf was watching her, her eyes wide, though her muzzle was not crinkled in worry at all. It was as if she was seeing something that Alyssa could not determine, but she was caught up there, grunting softly, tugging and tugging. Why wasn't her hoof free yet? Hadn't the root snapped? Why did it still feel like she was caught?

That was strange, so strange, but she had to see what was coming there, what was the case in her entrapment? Alyssa grumbled and looked back, pulling at her hoof, but...there was no root there, nor a branch, but something white, something that she should have recognised.

"What the..."

Alyssa's startled cry twisted into a shriek, the urge to defend herself snapping into play, even though it was not something that she actively thought about. One moment she was struggling away and the next she was trying to kick back - only to stop dead in her tracks, eyes wide and her chest heaving.

That... It was not a root, but something holding her, white-furred fingers and a black claw that she recognised, yes, with the disfiguration in the colouring running down the upper curve. Alyssa sucked in a breath.

"Sandor!"

She shrieked, his name ripping itself from her lungs as if it had merely been waiting to be spoken, her chest tight with emotion, fear and concern and hope and love all clashing together in one cacophony of emotion. There was no breaking free one from the other as she twisted around, all but hurling herself at the ground.

"Sandor, Sandor - Sandor!"

Alyssa couldn't stop saying his name, tears of joy streaming down her face, for she would never have cried on his sweet return, never in a hundred million years, so much longer than the span of her life. She clawed at him, digging into the ground with her front hooves and her hands, despite the angle at which it forced her to bend over. It did not matter, nothing else mattered but her sweet, sweet fox, the fox that she had always known would return to her.

He coughed and spluttered, dirt in his mouth, but his eyes were unfocused, as if Sandor did not really see her. And those tentacles, oh... Oh, those were out and they had frightened her so before when they had twisted and writhed, but she could not take heed of fear then, not after so long. Maybe she had changed too, in their time apart, growing bolder, growing stronger, becoming so much more than the mere doe-taur she had been before. But that was what was so very often said of time, in how one was forced to grow when events, quite often out of one's control, came to pass.

She didn't think of any of that, not as she grabbed at him, her fingers clinging and desperate, trying to avoid the tentacles, even though there were more of them, straining to get her fingers under his armpits. She had to get him out, even though the wise wolf was not helping. Oh, maybe it was all part of it, maybe the old wolfess had brought him back for her - but that was something that Alyssa's mind was just grasping at, not truly understanding, caught up in a moment that was not of her own design.

If it was of her design, she would never have had the fox go in the first place. And she would keep him close, yes, forevermore, always by her side, always where she could keep him close, where she could hold him near and dear.

"Sandor... Please... Please, help me!" She begged him, though it was just in her desperation to get him out of the ground, out of the field, not any true frustration towards him. "Sandor, please... You have to try, you have to dig too! Climb out, climb out!"

She pulled at him, her deer half sinking back to the ground, straining, muscles burning, though Alyssa did not care for any aches and pains that came. There was no concern there, none at all, not as she huffed and grunted, the fox, slowly but surely, becoming a little more visible with every passing moment. His fur seemed damp from the rich, dark soil, but that didn't dissuade her in the slightest, finally getting a good grip on him.

"Unff... Sandor!"

She wrenched him out with a triumphant shout, heart lifting, her soul, finally coming back together with the one that made her every day worthwhile. He emerged, his lower half too, onto the grass, dirt spilling from him, though some of it was still stuck in his fur, tentacles twitching limply, weakly. It was not like him, though Alyssa dragged him close, her arms around him, nose buried between his ears, holding him near.

If he was near, everything was going to be okay. If Sandor was home, everything was going to be okay.

"See," the diviner said, though there was a breath of relief in her tone, despite everything, despite not seeing quite what had come to be initially. "He is well, he is alive, he is in a good state."

The fox coughed again, on all fours, panting heavily, head lowered, exhaustion pulling through every line of his body. The tentacles that had become so much a part of him, even more than Alyssa knew, hung and sprawled from his body, draped across the ground. They were not weak, however, twitching back and forth, though a sense of energy being lost rang from them.

"Ugh..." Sandor coughed again, spitting up earth. "Al...Alyssa... Hi... Hello... My sweet..."

The diviner smiled, sitting back. Sometimes, things worked out just the way they were supposed to.

Even if, perhaps, she did not fully understand it either.

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*

Alyssa & Sandor

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Sandor breathed slowly, trying to deepen his breaths, though his lungs ached as if they had been raked raw by inner claws. The fox's nose tipped down, as he sat on the small bench in their bathroom, one that they had purchased for it was useful for him to sit on, to brush out any mats in his fur, taking care of everything that his body required. Right then, it was being used for Alyssa to tend to him, slowly cleansing his body, brushing the dirt from him.

"Sandor, it's so deep in your coat," she muttered to herself, enjoying the focus on her task, though that could have been the shaky relief flooding through still, making her a little weak at the knees. "How did it all get in there so much? Oh, Sandor... Sandor..."

She smiled to herself, combing through his fur gently, trying not to tug or pull too much, though that took a lot of effort for her to do. There was only so much, to be fair, but it was not all that bad, not really, not as she relaxed into the familiar scent of him, even though it was muddied with dirt and earth, the scent of nature. That was not all that far from his natural aroma, however, as he grunted and trembled faintly, though his hum of contentment had her leaning a little more into him again.

It was good, so good... So good to be close to him. Even if his white fur was more mud-like in that moment, a brown-white, tainted and dirtied. She could have put him in the bath straight away, but she was afraid of it staining his coat and, well, the tender care of him made her feel closer, like something between them was being repaired again, brought closer than ever.

It had been so long, so very long, since they had been together. And she hungered for all of him, every tiny little touch, how he twitched his tail, however tiredly, against her, the tip flicking back and forth.

"Oh, Sandor... There are so many scars... So many cuts!"

She sucked in a sharp breath, eyes crinkling at the corners. Although the fox stiffened slightly and twitched one ear back to her, he didn't pull away.

"I know..." He said slowly, testing and tasting the words in his mouth as he let them fly. "They... There was a lot going on, Alyssa. So much."

His words grew stronger with every moment, finding himself again. Oh, it was so good to be home, so good to be with her. Even when she had been dragging him home, slung over her back and slumped against her human back with his arms around her, he had tried to tell her just how much he loved her. The scent of her wrapped itself around him, tingling and tickling at his nostrils, though he had not even been able to help himself, not even back then, from sucking in the deepest, greediest breaths of her scent that he possibly could.

Even her hair... Oh, it was so soft, so very soft, straighter than it had been when he'd left her, though he was not to know if she had changed anything in her routine. He wanted to ask, wanted to see, but there was so much still for them to catch up on.

And he would have to tell her everything that had happened, all that had occurred, all that he had found out... Was he repeating himself again? He laughed lightly, though the giggle came out of his lips a little more deranged than he had been intending.

"Sandor?"

She knelt before him, as if she was afraid of scaring him away. He didn't blame her, though turned his lips into her palm all the same, for a tender kiss. Even her hand was soft against him, gentle, stroking down the line of his muzzle to his cheek and the thicker fluff that lay there. Even though it was springtime, his fur had grown thicker than usual, though there was most likely a reason for it.

"Yes, my love," he breathed. "I am here, I will never leave you again."

He didn't know if that was true. He still had to say. Still, it was a promise that he wanted to keep.

"I missed you so much, darling," she whispered, so quiet, yet his pointed ears pricked to catch her words, taking it all in, every word. "Every day, I knew you would come back. Every day, I thought of you. Every day, I longed for you."

Her brow furrowed, leaning into him, resting her chin on his shoulder, though the hug that Alyssa gave him was gentle, so very gentle, as if she thought he was so fragile that she thought he would break. She ran her hands down his back again, pulling away, tracing the lines of the scars there, some of the cuts fresher, though everything seemed to have clotted. Some of the drops of dried blood were even sap-like, though Alyssa filed that thought away for later perusal. There was no need to go through everything yet.

"I know, Sandor. I know," she said, kissing his cheek. "I know that you would never have stayed away unless something had changed, that something really had happened. "But how did so many scars come to be? Your trials... Oh, Sandor, my heart aches for you..."

She cleansed him though, getting as much dirt as she could from his fur without disturbing the healing cuts. Some of the dirt staining his coat would simply have to remain, if she was not to cause harm to him, which the doe-taur very much did not want to do. She could not, would not, caring for him tenderly as rested the comb and the brush on the bench beside him.

"One day," she said gently, cupping his muzzle, her ears earnest, "you will tell me what happened to you. I need to know..."

Sandor kissed her hand, pulling her closer, though Alyssa squeaked and trembled.

"Sandor! I don't want to bump you! What if I hurt you?"

He didn't want to tell her that there was nothing that she could do that could hurt him more than all the trials that he had already gone through.

"You won't, Alyssa," he said instead, letting her see just how well he was, sitting up a little taller, already some of the aches and pains slipping from his body. "I'm here, I'm with you. You can hold me if you want... But I am sorry that I didn't come back, that I came back so beaten up, so cut up."

His ears splayed out sadly to the sides of his head, a little downtrodden. She kissed him tenderly, lightly, her lips touching his with barely even a butterfly's touch, so gentle that she would not have crushed an eggshell with that touch.

"As long as you are here, darling, all is well, everything will be well," she said, lips curving into a genuine smile. "But why... I must ask... How did you end up in the dirt?"

Sandor's tail twitched, pulling in a little closer to his body. Alyssa leaned back, raising an eyebrow.

"Come on, out with it, mister," she said, giving him a playful, if gentle, poke, slipping into their old way of being together more easily than either of them could have imagined coming to pass. "You know you have something silly going on there, hm, don't you?"

She laughed at his blush, the mirth lightening the tension between them. Little did Alyssa know just how badly it was needed.

"Erm..." He laughed along with her, for it was not something that he feared getting out to anyone else - and Alyssa would find it funny too. "Well, I had wanted to come back to you before by teleportation. Which I did, yes... But I needed something from you, so that I could come back straight to you."

Alyssa nodded, lips comfortably resting against each other. That made sense.

"But why..." The deer-taur was still a little confused. "Why did you end up under my tail then? Or was it that the teleportation brought you to the wrong place? Surely you should have ended up behind me or close to me?"

Sandor rubbed the back of his neck, tired but still just about able to shoot her a cheeky grin. It was faint, however, fleeting on his muzzle.

"I took some hair from your tail, Alyssa," he explained. "It's very fluffy there, and thick, the white fur. I had wanted... It was supposed to be funny..."

And a lot more than that, though Alyssa rolled her eyes as comprehension suddenly dawned on her.

"Sandor!" She admonished him, though the fox could tell that she was not honestly concerned about anything, or mad at him. "You shouldn't have done that - what if someone saw? What if I was in public?"

He shrugged, but didn't even have it in him to be sheepish.

"I did not think of that and with how things changed after taking the fur," he said, trailing off. "Well, it slipped my mind. It all worked out for the best though, didn't it? I still found my way back to you and, well, you were, in a way, in public."

She laughed softly, looking down.

"I do not think the wise wolf would have understood your humour, Sandor," she said. "Nor your sly nature. But, please... I want to be close to you, if I may hug you... Oh, Sandor, I don't know where to put my hands with so many scars under your fur, there's even more..."

But the fox took the matter out of her hands as he drew her in close to him, rubbing her back and kissing her cheek, down to her neck.

"Come then," he said, feeling stronger and more himself than he had in a long time, even able to hide away some of the tentacles, though he had noticed just how Alyssa had not seemed to mind them as much as she had before. "Let's get cleaned up properly, in the bath, together. As it always should have been."

He put her in the bath gently, even though she protested that he was carrying her when she should really have been the one helping him, but the fox had to prove that, in his way, he was alright. Better than he had been, of course, without her. Though there was still so much to go through, so much to talk about.

He used his magic, thankful that he was still able to reach for it, to turn the water spout on, transporting the water from it already warmed, even though there were magical functions to heat the water in the house. Some of those magical enchantments had slipped during his time away and would need to be re-applied. With his stronger magic, after studying, they would, most likely, last longer a second time around.

Still, the tub filled around them, Sandor already naked. The fox had not given all that much concern as to his nudity before in the bathroom, perfectly comfortably, though there was something vulnerable and intimate about being naked around Alyssa after everything that had come to pass. The tub filled with warm water, almost hot, but stayed warmed to the perfect temperature as he sat in front of her, letting the doe-taur wriggle in closer between him, sitting between Sandor's legs.

The deer-taur exhaled softly, relaxing with the warm water, but she did let him lift her arms to get her top off, leaving her completely bare of any clothes. Alyssa smiled. He still remembered that she hated the feeling of her clothes wet and clinging to her, how uncomfortable that was for her.

Her arms slid around him as if they had never left. It was closer, more intimate, better than when she had been carrying him, when he had been carrying her. In that moment, it was all about being close to one another, rekindling their relationship, letting them come together once again, to remind one another of what their bodies felt like.

Alyssa trembled, her lower lip feeling thicker, as if it was shaking.

Oh no...

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She didn't want to cry, not after she had Sandor back, but he held her close anyway, drawing her in against his furred chest, though even she could feel the big scar across his chest.

"Sandor... I... I... I thought you were..."

"Shush, my love, I'm here, I will always be here, I promise..."

Alas, it was not a promise that he could frankly keep, not a promise that could remain on his lips for longer than it took to let it fly. He had to promise her, however, had to give her that security, that comfort, for things had already spiralled far, far out of his control. Even if things went wrong, well... One promise wasn't going to change that. But it could give her comfort straight away, immediately.

Sandor held back his sigh. He had changed and had matured, though had he not been warned about keeping secrets? That was still something that he needed to rectify, even if the fox had no idea at all about how he was supposed to start that conversation. It was too deep for him, but everything was beyond him in that manner. It was time to step up and face it like a mage, like a fox, like a partner.

"Shush, it's okay, everything is okay, darling, I'm here, I'm here..."

Sandor held her tightly and rubbed Alyssa's back while she cried, drawing her in close and tight to his chest, protecting her. His tentacles, the last of them that he had not been able to fully retract, pulled back into his body, the fur smoothing over them once more as if they had never existed. So, the pills were working for that side of him too, controlling his physical appearance as a result of the toxin in his body...

That was good. They had softened the devouring already, but he wanted more, the effectiveness of them giving him hope.

The fox licked the tears off her face, caressing her softly, washing her face. The soothing lap had Alyssa pressing into him a little more, giggling when his tongue tickled her in a way that she did not expect. But it was still good, great, wonderful to be so close, even though she pushed away his lapping tongue after a bit.

"Ugh, Sandor..." She laughed, lighter after crying, rubbing the back of her hand over her eyes. "That tickles so... There's plenty of nice, warm water in here to wash up with, if you think I'm so dirty!"

The fox grinned, taking a washcloth instead with a light coating of soap on it. His saliva sticking to her face, most likely, would not be the most pleasant of things for Alyssa either, though his licking had done the trick of cheering her up.

"Then this will be gentler," he said. "But...I like you dirty, my sweet doe-taur. I like you dirty in bed, I like you in my arms, I like when my scent is what's clinging to you, making you dirty."

He nuzzled into her neck, snuffling softly, making the deer-taur laugh all over again.

"But I like you as you are too, Alyssa," he breathed, too soft right then, forgetting himself a little, a more compassionate, sweet fox than he had been. "Every day I thought of you... And, if I may... I thought of being with you."

Alyssa blushed heavily. Goodness! If there was anything to take her mind to calmer waters, despite how her heartbeat fluttered, it was that.

"Sandor..." She blushed, though it did not seem right, not anymore, to hold anything back. "I thought of you, like that, so much too. This bed... I did not always sleep in it."

Oh, it was embarrassing to admit that, but Alyssa had to plough on now that she had begun. The words came spilling out, the deer-taur still sat comfortably between his legs, not willing to move away. She had been away from him for too long already.

"I sometimes slept in the guest room," she confessed. "We never had a bed put in there, so...there was more space for me to sleep standing up, with little against the walls. There's a big, plush cushion that I've been sleeping on, but it felt more natural to be against the wall like that."

He kissed her tenderly, deepening the kiss as her cheeks heated up and even Alyssa could not hold back a breathy moan into the kiss.

"Mmm..."

"Alyssa, my sweet," he murmured against her lips. "We can change anything at all about this house that you like, all to make you more comfortable. You only have to talk to me. You are my utmost priority, there is nothing that comes higher than you, nothing that is greater than you."

The fox paused, letting his lips stay there, barely touching hers, so that they shared breath. Alyssa trembled. It was an act often performed between taurs that cared for one another and her heart skipped a beat. Had he done that just for her? Had he taken note of what other taurs did just for her?

"I missed you in this bed," she said, breathy, as if she didn't want to raise her voice any higher than a whisper. "It is not right, no... Not without you, Sandor. And I have not been with anyone...no... You are the only one for me."

He blinked, pulling back a little.

"I knew you would wait for me," he said, sincerity coming through. "But...you took care of your own needs, right, Alyssa? You did look after yourself too?"

The doe-taur blushed furiously, but it was good to have that heat in her cheeks again, the burning tickle flaring across her skin, the feeling of being ever so slightly too shy. Only Sandor could bring that out in her.

"Yes..." Alyssa said, eyes half-closed. "Mmm... I did, sometimes, take care of myself, my body, my needs. But all I thought of was you, how good it feels when you take me, when you fill me. Even when I'm on top too and grinding back on you."

Sandor shivered. Oh, he had never heard Alyssa talk like that, not so openly. It was a big step for her and in testament to just how much she had changed, although he loved every last little bit, all because it was her.

"I thought of that too, Alyssa," he said.

His voice dropped a note, becoming huskier.

"I missed touching you, like this," he said, demonstrating by sliding his hands down her back to her doe-half. "I want to run my hands all over you now, to be with you in bed... But I want to be fully present for it too. I'm so tired and I can see it in your face too."

Alyssa nodded, lips faintly breaking into a smile.

"Yes... I understand that. I want to feel everything, to take in everything. I don't want to miss a single thing when we sleep together again. It wouldn't be right, not after so long."

Sandor chuckled, taking the washcloth and gently moving it over her body, though she was a lot cleaner than him. Alyssa smiled and pressed into the touch, surprising even the fox.

"Alyssa, you're more forward now," he breathed. "I love you however you are, of course, but this...I adore this."

She did not blush that time, but took another cloth and bath brush, one that was designed for working out stubborn dirt from fur coats.

"I know, Sandor, I can see it in your face too, like you see my tiredness," she murmured, brushing through his fur, taking pleasure in her attentiveness to him, though Sandor repaid it in kind to her. "But I want to look after you now, to make sure you are comfortable, at last. With all this dirt in your fur, you cannot feel like yourself at all. And it cannot all be from appearing under me in the dirt, honestly, Sandor..."

She chuckled at him, shaking her head. Oh, he was a funny fox, but he was _her_funny fox. And she knew in her heart of hearts that that would always be the case.

Slowly, tenderly, she worked the brush through his fur, Sandor's head dropping forward more and more. She even let the fox rest against her while she worked on his back, not wanting to struggle to move around him in the tug too much, though she would need to rouse him from his slow, dream-like state a little later, when she had to work on parts of his fur that she simply could not reach from there. But she would let that come when it came, taking her time in the meantime.

"Mmm... Quiet, Sandor... You're home now. Everything's okay, with you, with me..."

She murmured and hummed softly to him as she worked, taking her time, for he was the most important thing in the world to her. A little more refreshed with every passing second, the fox smiled faintly, eyes half-closed, lulled by her humming, as if it was all just a lullaby, all for him.

He couldn't have imagined never getting to come home. Regardless of what the future held for both, he was so very glad that he had come home, that he had returned to Alyssa, all to feel the closeness of her body against his. Their connection was something that no amount of study or training or wandering could surpass, even if it had all been for a reason.

The time it took to truly wash out Sandor's fur took them late into the night, though they had not eaten. They were too tired to eat, too drained to eat, but they still needed one another.

He still...had not told her. Though he didn't want to reveal the truth of everything, not yet. He wanted to see what would come first, what he would have to do.

"Alyssa..." He breathed, nuzzling into her while she tried to dry him off with a towel. "My sweet... You have no idea how much I have missed you."

He took a breath, swallowing hard. It was not like him to show more difficult emotions, though, frankly, there had been little in his time that had brought out quite that level of emotion in him. Not like the emotion that came in the heights of passion and sex, the blistering arousal that had his heart singing with joy. Nor was it like the sweet lightness of holding her close while they sat by the lake and watched the sunset, the wind rustling faintly and gently through the reeds.

That was joy. That was contentment. Being with her was love.

The swelling of emotion, like a lump in his stomach and a tightness in his throat, spoke of far, far more than that, a depth to his desire and bond with her that, honestly, the fox had not acknowledged. Maybe it was not something that would ever have come to light if he had not gone through what he had.

And it was not over yet. But he would come to that when he could, when he was able to.

Until then...things were safe. Safer. And it was Alyssa that he needed.

Alyssa drew him in close to her on the bed, their fur mostly dry, which helped for getting comfortable. They had never slept like that before, but she folded her legs on top of the bed, allowing him to slide onto her back so that he could hold her tightly from behind. It was hard to do when they were on their sides, moving too much in the night.

The doe-taur sighed softly, leaning back into the feel of his fur. Oh, that was so nice, so good to be near him again, to let his softer, lighter scent with the earthen tint sink into her. Neither wore anything, but she was comfortable with that, settled in herself.

She'd changed. He'd changed. But they were together, where they were supposed to be.

"My sweet..." He breathed, kissing the back of her neck, softly brushing her hair out of the way to reach her bare skin, still slightly pink from the warm bath. "Our time together will be nothing but sweet after this."

"Careful, Sandor," she said, teasing him despite her tiredness. "If you keep up that manner, I'll get used to you being so kind, so sweet... I'll miss the naughty fox that I used to have and go looking for him."

He laughed softly, nuzzling the back of her neck. Alyssa could not help but shiver.

"Mmm... Yes, he's still in there," the fox confirmed. "But I'm tired now and I'll be myself again soon, I promise."

She nodded her agreement.

"We have gone through a lot."

He did not fail to notice how she included herself in that, his heart panging for her, a jolt of strain lancing through. Even though he'd had no choice, he hated that he had put her through so much, that he had made things so difficult for her.

By way of apology, though he would spend the rest of his life making up the distance and the time apart to her, he pulled on a small spell, lips moving with a light, muffled incantation. Two apple trees grew from the wood of the bedroom floor, wood twisting and twining together into slender, strong trunks, the branches stretching out over the bed. They populated with fruit, bright, red apples with yellow "blossoms" on them, showing the sweetness within, the branches heavy with them, though none would fall on them while they slept, not when the apple trees came from his spell.

Alyssa blinked sleepily up at the trees, her lips parted in wonder.

"Oh..."

Vines twisted out from the trees, like Sandor's vines but a part of the apple trees, twisting out and out and out, connecting the two trees. He stroked his doe-taur's back as the vines wound themselves softly into a net that connected the two trees, the net falling behind his back. It ended up a little like the back of a chair, allowing Sandor to lean back a little and not put all his weight forward onto Alyssa.

He didn't want to strain her, no, not in any way. As always, his doe-taur, the light and love of his life, was his top priority.

She was comfortable keeping her torso more upright to rest, possessing stronger muscles in her back, even though her body did not show itself to be very muscular. Like deer, she could sleep upright too, of course, her muscles locking to sleep, but that was something that Alyssa barely even thought about, so much a part of her day-to-day life that it eased through everything. There were so many subtle things that were a part of her that otherwise did not come to light, but they were there, nonetheless.

Intrinsic, a part of her...just like her love for Sandor.

Alyssa smiled at the fruit ripening fully on the tree, so glossy and shiny that she could not help but salivate. Her lips closed, hiding it from her lover, but Sandor always knew what she wanted. He reached up, carefully plucking an apple from the branch, and handed it to her, tucking it between her hands.

"There you are, my darling..."

He'd never spoken to her so tenderly, but, somehow, it still felt right then, in that moment. Perhaps they should have had more sweeter, romantic moments like that? Yet only time would tell just how their relationship would change and develop, coming together more and more.

His fingers combed through her hair softly, stroking her head as she ate slowly. Juice trickled down her chin and Alyssa squeaked, wiping it away with a blush.

"Thank you, Sandor," she said, pressing back into him a little more, grateful for his warmth, the stability of his body. "You know I didn't eat."

"I didn't want you to wake up hungry in the night," he said honestly. "Besides, I know you graze still. I will grow you as many apples as you like for the rest of our time."

It was a promise, though, still, there was more to be discussed, something that he had had to do. He didn't dare break the moment, however, not that night. Not when everything was as perfect as it had come together for them.

He took another apple, but Alyssa surprised him with a little trick, a smirk tugging briefly at the corner of her lips. Breaking the apple in two with just her bare hands, she offered him half, wanting to share, and the fox took it with a raised eyebrow.

"Alyssa," he teased. "I had no idea you were so strong!"

The doe-taur laughed.

"No, no... Perhaps so, in other ways, but it is all about the pressure and how you turn your wrist. I will teach you one day."

He didn't tell her that the mages could cut their fruit with magic, if they needed to without utensils. He just accepted her gift with a smile and a kiss to her cheek.

"It's so good to have you back, Sandor," she murmured. "This bed and this house... Oh, I hope you like how I have kept it all, Sandor. But everything here has felt so bare without you, so empty. I need you here with me. A stable may well be enough for a doe-taur like me, but I do not need a house this big all to myself, not ever again."

He chewed on the apple, relishing in the crunch. Oh, it was good to be hungry for sweetness again, for the juice of the fruit. Holding himself back from eating too voraciously, he smiled and thought consciously about taking his time.

"This is not suited to you, Alyssa," he agreed, "but I would never have said that it was too large for you. But, if you feel that way, we can change the design, have more cosier, small spaces for you. Maybe a larger garden, with a secret path... Would you like that?"

"Yes," she smiled, going through her apple with more vigour than Sandor was allowing himself. "Oh, that would be lovely, Sandor, somewhere that we could go and sit in private, with big trees surrounding us. Maybe even a little pond."

"And I'll take you away too, on a vacation," he said, smiling at her enthusiasm, at how easy it was to listen to her dulcet tones. "I hear that Archipelago is a wonderful place to go away to, in the far east of the kingdom."

He didn't tell her what was wrong with him, not truly, not even then. He just wanted to reconnect with her, to spend time with his dear doe-taur, the one that lifted his heart the most, when he had never, ever intended to be away from her for that long. It would be revealed, all as Miron had said, the serpent cautioning him against holding secrets from his lover, but he didn't want to spoil that night. If a break from the soreness of her life could rest Alyssa as well as allow him to look onward, the fox was simply grateful for what was being afforded to him.

"Where is that?" She murmured. "Further than Irron? Will we not have to go there on the boat?"

"Yes, darling," he confirmed. "It's exotic, to us, and warm, so warm. It would take a few days on the boat, if you are prepared to travel that far."

"Mmm..." She wasn't quite sure what she was saying, even though she agreed with Sandor and wanted to go with him, wanted to make sure that she could keep going, that she could stay with him. "Yes... Yes, that sounds...mmmm...wonderful."

Alyssa trembled, a yawn sneaking free of her lips, though she was not embarrassed about her tiredness. It dragged her down, lips softening, her eyelids closing. Against her lover, she was finally safe, she was finally cared for. She finally had Sandor right back where he belonged.

In slumber, she finally rested.

Sandor sighed softly, still tired and needing to relax, to rest, but he took a moment there just for himself. Resting his hands lightly on the doe part of her under him, he squeezed with his thighs. She was so soft and yet solid, reassuringly so, his arms wrapping around her torso as he rested his chin on her shoulder.

"Goodnight, Alyssa."

He breathed, letting his breathing slow to match hers, sleep creeping upon him.

"I'm so very grateful that you are the one that I am with..." He said, quietly so as not to wake her. "I only want to be with you. You, now and...forever."

The fox swallowed, ears slipping back.

"But... What am I going to do when the pills run out?"

He still had hope, but his time was running out.

And he still had not told Alyssa.