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Lucius was drenched in shame. He still couldn’t believe he was parading through the busiest street of town, completely, utterly, embarrassingly bare naked!

But the people around him didn’t seem to mind his presence even as he strutted his humongous stinking butt right in front of their faces. Some of them even complimented the young stud as he walked by them, praising his huge muscles and vitality. Lucius didn’t particularly like those comments. Even if they were well-intentioned, they made him feel so much more self-aware of his nakedness. As the young stud blushed in shame he wished people would keep their comments to themselves.

Master Cain gave Lucius’ bare butt a good whipping so he would hurry up. His master was wearing the traditional clothes of the mages guild, their iconic dark robes… and no undergarments. Lucius tried not to think too hard about his master’s loins, as they were riding on top of him right now.

Of course, the reason no passersby gave the old man ridding the young naked boy a second glance is that his Master had turned him into a young stallion before heading out for the night.

It has been two weeks since Lucius had become his Master’s apprentice. The dreadful magical Mark on his chest that burned with intensity every time his Master transformed him just by sheer force of will became a permanent reminder of his curse. The young boy was doomed to be the Master’s plaything until Cain considered he had finished his education, whenever that may be.

The powerful wizard and his horse marched through the suburbs until they arrived to the destination: a rusty old pub filled with scummy-looking patrons.

Lucius wondered how the hell would a visit to this place would foment his education on the arts of magic, but he gave up any hope of learning magic the moment he meet his Master anyway.

A stableboy working part-time at the pub came to greet the wizard, but the young man of tanned skin panicked when he recognized Cain’s robe.

“Hahaha, no need to worry about us. The rumors about mages kidnapping young women and children to experiment our spells on them are completely false.” Said Master Cain with a smile. “For the most part.”

“Oh! Of course I wasn’t suspecting that from you, sir!” Replied the stable boy with haste. “I’ve never been in a position to judge anyone, much less a sorcerer. I have lots of respect for people versed in the mystic arts.” The young man looked at Lucius. “Do you need your horse parked?”

“Well, of course.” Was Master Cain’s answer. “Do you have a horse wash service available?”

“For a small additional fee, yes we do.”

“I want the full package.” Said Cain and he patted his horse. “My poor sod here hasn’t showered in weeks. He reeks of horseshit all over.”

“Sure thing, sir.” Master Cain got off from Lucius’ saddle and gave the young man his reins.

“Oh, and don’t forget to clean off his sheath, too. This bastard’s cock is a cheese factory.”

“Aye, aye, sir.”

Lucius would’ve wanted to scream “Are you for fucking real?!” But a small neigh was all he could mutter out as the stable boy took him away.

“Ugh, finally some time to enjoy myself.” Master Cain removed his black hood revealing a bald head with a greying short beard and his green eyes shining mesmerizingly in the moonlight. “I’ve been doing nothing but babysitting that critter for the last two weeks. I’m craving for a nice glass of wine.”

But when Cain walked through the front door he found out the place was fuller than expected. It was infested with huge soldiers stuffed in oversized pieces of armor chanting and laughing in drunken joy.

“Holy lords, did we win a war or something? I’ve never seen more smelly men dancing together in my life, and I went to a lot of crazy orgies when I was young.” Cain commented to himself.

From what he could gather from the picturesque scene of burly men, it was a retirement party organized by the royal guard in honor of Augustus “The Immortal” Septum. This sixty-five year old man was in a phenomenal shape for someone who had intervened in street fights, fought against drunk warriors and chased all sorts of runaway criminals for the most part of his life.

“Wow, that’s impressive!” Said a young guard to his senior. “You’ve been in the royal guard for over forty years, and you’ve barely suffered a single scratch! I’ve only been in the guard for six months and I’ve already lost my pinkie!” He showed Augustus his four-fingered left hand. “You must be the luckiest guy in the whole world! I’m sure you’ll live long and prosper after your retirement, which officially begins in five minutes!”

“And you’re so fit!” Said another member of the royal guard. “What’s your secret?”

“Hahaha,” laughed Augustus. “I don’t know, it must be fate or something.”

Cain, who was overhearing their conversation, let out a slight chuckle. “Ha! Fate…” He had better things to do rather than to listen to the most macho men in town complimenting each other, so he took a seat and called out to the owner of the place.

The owner of the place was referred by everyone as Fat Porky (when he wasn’t looking, of course) because of the huge amount of body fat he carried along him at all times. He was such a fat bastard that even his dirty apron didn’t cover the entirety of his bellybutton. And that was very unfortunate, because his navel was a giant outie that stared right at your face, yuck! The obese man wore one of those white hats that chefs usually wear, although nothing this sweaty ball of lard of a man wore would remain white for too long.

“A glass of wine, Porky!” Called out Cain snapping his fingers.

“The wha’?!” Snorted the porky man with his pig-like flat nose as he served the guards. “Can’t hear, too busy here, wait for ya’ turn!” And then the huge porcine monstrosity went inside the kitchen.

“Ugh…” Seemed like Cain’s glass of wine had to wait.

The more experienced guards knew better than to deal with a wizard, but the young soldier who had lost his pinkie sat on the same wooden table as Cain.

“Hey…That tunic…You must be from the mage’s guild, aren’t you?” He asked the old mage.

Cain glanced at the young guard without showing any interest. “I’ve had my differences with the guild in the past,” said Cain remembering that time he accidentally stepped on one of his guildmates after turning him into an ant. Such a disgrace… The red stain on his bare foot took hours to completely wipe away. “But yes, you could say that.”

“The name’s Huey. Do you think you could fix my hand?” The blonde young man pointed to the spot where his left pinkie should have been. “I heard that with a regeneration spell it takes less than a minute, but the local healer won’t cure me because it isn’t covered by my insurance.”

Cain stared at the young man with distaste. “And let me guess, just because I’m a mage you think I’m always carrying around all sorts of magical trinkets to do random acts of magic on demand?”

“Oh…” The young man looked down.

“Well, of course I do! What sort of wizard would I be if I didn’t?”

“Ohhhh!” The young man’s eyes lit up.

“But you’ll have to treat me to a shot of something afterwards, eh?” Cain said as he untied the lace on the upper part of his tunic and started rummaging through its internal breast pockets. “Where did I put that thing…? With the thingy that did those thingies…?” He took a few small bottles and put them on the table.

“Are those magic potions?” Said the curious young man.

“Some of them are, the others are just absinth. I can’t remember right now which ones are which.”

Cain then took out an extensible rod.

The young man was impressed. “Oh! A magic wand!”

“Uh…Yes…A magic wand…” Cain put his portable dildo back in his breast pocket.

“Ah, there it is!” He took out what looked like a small band-aid. “I always carry these around for emergencies. I’ve imbued them with regenerative magic so they are much more useful than the regular ones.”

“Oh, that’s so nice!”

Cain helped the young man to put on the band-aid on the lower part of his left hand. “That should do it, just give it a minute or so and you’ll have your finger back.”

The young man was delighted. “Oh, I can already feel the flesh regrowing! Thanks so much! I don’t know why you mages have such a bad reputation…Er…No offense.”

“None taken. Enjoy your finger.” Cain said with the most sincere smile.

It was then when an intimidating figure entered through the front door and the pub went silent. It was a hulking mountain of muscle dressed in a dark grey clothing that covered most of the skin on its body and its face. The size of the figure was frightening, but most of the patrons breathed a sigh of relief when they saw its eyes glancing into outer space for a long time as if they belonged to a complete idiot. It was probably just some dumb drunktard.

But the tension returned when they heard its deep baritone voice. A voice so deep it sent shivers to everyone’s spine. Everyone’s except Cain’s, of course.

“HAHA, AT LAST! WE MEET ONCE AGAIN, CAIN!”

All the brave soldiers tactically retreated by hiding under the tables. “(So much for them…What a bunch of cowards)” thought Cain.

“Do you know who that guy is, Mr. Mage sir?” Whispered Huey from behind a curtain located within a safe distance from danger.

Cain looked straight at the bulking figure’s eyes with a very serious expression. “He’s definitely…” He began.

The young man braced himself.

“…A complete stranger to me.” Cain finished with a shrug.

“Oh well, that was anticlimactic.” The young man seemed disappointed.

“DON’T MOCK ME!” The figure said angrily, although his eyes didn’t move an inch from their position. “IT’S BEEN A LONG THREE YEARS, BUT FINALLY MY SEARCH HAS COME TO AN END…” The huge humanoid slowly walked through the pub as he talked, heading to Cain’s table. “IT’S TIME FOR MY REVENGE, YOU FILTHY, DEPRAVED…‘WIZARD’!” The floor vibrated with every step he took. The man finally took out a chair and sat on it and pointed an accusing finger. “AND BELIEVE ME CAIN…IT WON’T BE PRETTY…HAHAAHAAHA!”

“Mmmm…Nope, not a clue. Sorry.” Cain shrugged again. “And besides…Mr. Evil Laugh…”

“WHAT IS IT?!”

“Um…You sat on the wrong table.”

Cain was right. The figure had sat on a completely empty table and had been talking to the wall.

“…DAMN.”

The figure quickly stood up, put the chair back in its proper place, then hastily walked over to Cain’s table, sat down, and pointed the exact same accusing finger at the mage.

“AS I SAID…IT WON’T BE PRETTY!”

“(This man’s acting very strange. Maybe there’s something wrong with his eyesight or something…?)” Thought Huey as he watched.

“You’re one of my enemies from my guild aren’t you?” Cain asked.

The man slammed his fist on the table with anger. “GAH! YOU REALLY DON’T REMEMBER ME?! WELL THEN, LET’S SEE IF THIS REFRESHES YOUR MEMORY…”

To Huey’s surprise, the man started clumsily unbuckling his pants. Cain however remained calm, as if this was a regular occurrence.

After an uncomfortable minute of fumbling with his belt, the figure took off his pants. He wasn’t wearing any undergarments.

“Umm…Judging by its shape, size and color…You must be an orc. But I don’t remember sucking off *this* one. I’m sure I’d remember.”

“Don’t stare at my cock you faggot! Arggh!” The figure’s voice suddenly had became much clearer for some reason. The orc turned around and both Cain and the curious Huey were presented to huge dark green buttcheeks. They smelled rancid, no doubt helped by the shit-stained hairs that covered them.

“Yes… How does it feel, Cain? How does it feel to find yourself face-to-face with me after all these years? You thought I was done for, and you were WRONG!”

Huey didn’t know if he should scream in horror or just laugh. “(He’s…)”

“Ah, so it’s you. Sir Angelus. Or more appropriately I should drop the ‘-gel-’ part now…” Cain snickered.

The orc’s smelly anus closed with indignity.

“Stop mocking me!” Angelus said. “I’m not even an ass! I’m an ANUS!” The orc turned around so his ass was in front of everyone. “Yeah! You heard that well! I’m a fucking shithole! I’m not afraid to say it! It’s been like this for three years, I’m freaking used to it!” The trembling anus seemed desperate to convince itself that it was true that he was used to it.

The talking anus hadn’t been an orc’s behind during all of its existence however. He used to be a human knight that fought in the war against the orc kingdom. He had counted with the “assistance” of Cain during battle. But the mage had betrayed him after he had been promised a huge amount of gold by an orc spy. It had been pretty simple for Cain to get rid of Angelus, he just had to place a curse on the knight’s most precious battle accessory, “The All-Seeing Eye”. This golden amulet increased accuracy by a lot, but Cain’s curse had caused it to turn Angelus into a…well… another type of third eye the exact moment he came in contact with another orc during battle. Worst of all, the orc he had the pleasure of serving as an asshole was very stupid, even for orc standards.

“…But to subestimate me was a grave mistake! It’s been three long years, but I finally figured out how to use my nerve endings to control this dumb orc’s head! And it works perfectly, as you can see- WOAH!” The orc absent-mindedly scratched his smelly asshole and then licked his dirty fingers. “No! Don’t do that! Bad orc! Bad orc!”

Cain found the scene very amusing. You didn’t see a talking butt scolding his own owner every day. Huey on the other hand was conflicted: sure, the funny talking anus could be bluffing, but what if it was true? Could this mage be as evil as the rumors said?

When the butt stopped arguing with the orc it was attached to it turned towards Cain once again. “Laugh all you want, baldy-face! You’ll be crying in despair when you hear about my plan!”

“‘Baldy-face’? Seriously? That doesn’t sound very insulting coming from a butt-face…” Cain pointed out.

“Aww, shut up!” The buttcheeks were starting to sweat nervously. “What I mean to say is…I’VE GOT AN HOSTAGE!”

“Holy shit!” Cried out some of the soldiers.

“Impossible! What a plot twist!” Cried out Huey.

Cain however was unfazed. “Pfft, now THAT’S a good joke. I’ve never cared about anyone.”

“Now you’re acting like the tough guy, uh?” Cain was certain Angelus was trying to arch an eyebrow with his butt hairs. “I may be an asshole, but I’m all ears. I’ve heard the rumors, you’ve taken up on a new apprentice…”

“What?!” Cain was genuinely surprised. He had heard about Lucius? How had the word gotten out?!

“Hahaha! Not so calm now are we?” Said Angelus while the orc picked his nose. “I captured him the moment you left him alone! Getting careless with age, uhm?”

Cain could’ve cared less about his apprentice. But finding a replacement and starting from scratch would be a bother. So he had no choice. “Be a man, Angelus. This is between us. Leave him out of this!”

“Hehehe,” the anus laughed. “I knew my plan would work, after all, you’d do anything for your beloved…” The orc walked quite clumsily to one of the tables and kicked it over. Everyone got a good look at the tied up figure that was hidden below it right away. “…Augustus Septum!”

“Holy shit!” Cried out some of the soldiers.

“Impossible! What a plot twist!” Cried out Huey.

Cain however was unfazed. “Who the fuck is that?”

“Help! I’m innocent!” Said the old man as he struggled with the ropes. His armor had been removed and was only wearing some oversized underwear and a white undershirt.

“Teehee! Time for me to spill the beans on the matter…” Angelus said and unexpectedly farted. “…Ugh… An unfortunate analogy… Anyway, yeah, you heard that well. ‘The Immortal’ is actually the apprentice of Cain’s dark arts!”

“I swear that whatever that strange butt is talking about isn’t true! I’ve never met that ‘Gaim’ guy!” Cried the scared man.

Cain agreed. “Yeah, me neither. He’s not my apprentice.”

“Lies!” Said the butt. His orc grabbed the tied up old man by his back and to the surprise of everyone he lowered his underpants. “This is all the proof I need!”

“Oh! Heavens!” The old man’s face turned pink with embarrassment as his buttocks were exposed to the awe of everyone in the pub.

“As you can see he has the Mars symbol engraved on his right buttock! That’s a magical Apprentice’s Mark! Cain’s, to be precise!” The anus smirked.

Actually, what Augustus had engraved on his buttocks wasn’t a Mars symbol, but a tattoo of the male symbol that he got himself made in his crazy teenage years. But no matter how the old man tried to explain, none of his comrades believed his story.

“I can’t believe our old captain could’ve betrayed us like this!”

“No wonder he was ‘The Immortal’…He had a dark mage by his side!”

“Yeah, that’s right!” Angelus cried out. “Your captain was a dark mage’s puppet all along! And believe me when I say Cain is not only a mage. He’s also a faggot. So yeah, I’m sure he has fucked this guy lots of times.” A huge orc finger was inserted up Augustus’ tight asshole as a visual example and the old man shrieked in agony. A particular soldier was so disgusted by this revelation he puked on the spot. (“I can’t believe I shared so many battles with that man!”)

The orc took out a magic hand-grenade from his pocket. Magic hand-grenades were similar to pre-made magic potions, with the main difference being that they explode when thrown.“If you value your apprentice’s safety, you’ll accept my conditions.” Angelus said matter-of-factly. “For starters, you’ll give me the golden All-Seeing Eye amulet back, so I can break my curse, and then…”

Cain’s laughter echoed across the pub once again. “Wait, what? You did all this for that cheap amulet? It wasn’t even real gold, so my local appraiser only gave me a few coins for it.”

Angelus’ mind snapped when he heard that. “You…sold it?…For…a few coins?…!”

“Yeah. And that was three years ago. No idea who has it now, and that’s assuming it hasn’t been molten.”

“Molten…?!”

“Yeah. You see, when metal crap is deemed useless, it’s recycled so it can be made into other things…”

“I know that! How…How could you have done such a thing?!…You…You know very well that a curse isn’t the same thing as a spell!”

And Angelus wasn’t wrong. Even the lower-rank wizards knew the difference between a curse and a spell when it came to transformative magic. Spells can change the body in a wide range of ways and so can curses. Let’s suppose you turn a peasant into a frog with a spell. In order to turn him back, you could just use any spell that turned animals into humans. Hell, even a pre-made magic potion would work if the spellcaster didn’t use too much of his power when casting. Curses on the other hand work differently. Let’s get back to our peasant example. If you turned him into a frog with a curse, then it’d be more complicated to reverse. The curse would take priority over any spells you’d cast until the curse-breaking condition was meet (‘True love’s kiss’ being a famous example). Obviously this didn’t necessarily meant cursed people were immune to magic. Let’s suppose you hit Angelus with the titular frog spell. Obviously he’d become a frog…’s anus, as his curse takes priority. The way multiple spells and curses combine can be quite unpredictable, so newcomers at the mage’s guild are discouraged from testing curses on the practice subjects. At least, for their first year.

So in other words if the All-Seeing Eye which was required in order to be able to break Angelus’ curse had been destroyed in the way Cain had insinuated then Angelus was pretty much screwed for the rest of his existence.

“You fucking bastard!!! I’ll kill your goddamned apprentice!” The tight anus had really lost it. Before anyone else could react the orc’s hands smashed the magic grenade against Augustus’s bare rump.

The magic began working its wonders immediately. Gasps echoed across the pub as a pink protuberance sprouted out just above the captain’s buttcrack. The pink thing grew in length exponentially until it looked like a giant fleshy tentacle. The new limb swayed, prehensile and alive. The next changes affected Augustus’ balls. First they got a brighter shade of pink and then the man’s testicles grew in size until they got comically big and heavy.

Augustus could only hear his subordinates’ laughter, having no idea what fate awaited to him. “H-Hey, what’s happening back there?! I don’t- Squeek! Squeek!” The man was shocked when his gruff voice was replaced by high-pitched squeaking sounds. His teeth reshaped, his front teeth getting unevenly longer than the rest of them. His ears got rounder and moved to the top of his head, his nose rolled up into a ball and his white moustache turned into a set of unruly whiskers.

“SQUEEK! SQUEEK!” The man squeaked. Grey fur started sprouting all over his body, which in no way made him feel less naked when his whole frame rapidly shrank in size inside between his underwear until the proud immortal captain had been turned in all aspects into a small and vulnerable rodent.

Now that the ropes tied around his hands and feet had become undone, Augustus the small scared rat hid inside his oversized underwear, rendering him a small shivering bulge inside his own smelly underpants to everyone else in the room.

“THIS IS WHAT YOU GET FOR MESSING WITH ME!” The anus screamed as he lifted a giant orc boot and was about to reduce Augustus into a small bloody pulp when…

“Stop!” Screamed Huey leaping into Angelus. The giant orc was able to swat the young man away like a pesky fly, but these valuable seconds gave the small rat the opportunity to run away from his underpants and into one of the pub’s numerous mouseholes.

“Shit! Look at what you did, kid!” Angelus screamed in frustration. “Are you one of Cain’s apprentices as well? I’ll just kill you the old-fashioned way!” The googly-eyed orc fumbled through his pockets and took out a knife.

“Oh, crap!” Yelled Huey, his head still spinning from the hit he had just took from the orc. The young soldier looked at Cain. “You have to help me!”

Cain was busy flicking off a bugger from his nose.

“Don’t just stand there! Do something!” Huey pleaded. “Use your magic or anything!”

“Meh. There’s no need for me to do anything.” Was Cain’s foretelling answer.

“You fucker!” Spat Huey back at the mage. Then Huey felt something on the tip of his tongue. There was…something…coming out from it…

Huey put his finger in his mouth and there he found… another finger. “Wha’ the hell??” A human finger had grown out from the tip of his tongue, making it difficult for him to talk. And that wasn’t the only extra finger he had on his body…

Still in shock, Huey couldn’t believe his eyes when he saw his hands. They had around thirty fingers each! And the number seemed to be multiplying very fast and across all of his body.

The young man screamed in agony as fingers began growing out from every pore of his skin. His armor and pants felt tight and constricting as fingers grew out from his chest. The fingers seemed to be out of control, poking at every direction as if they were worms that wanted to get out of from inside Huey’s body.

The soldier in his pain felt the need to remove his armor, but that didn’t stop the fingers growing out from everywhere. All across his arms and legs were more and more fingers. His chest was full of fingers, even from his nipples more fingers didn’t stop appearing.

Some of the soldiers in the pub couldn’t stand to watch anymore and ran out while they had the chance. Most of them, however, were too shocked to even attempt to move. They watched in morbid curiosity as the young man recoiled in agony while his body got transfigured in the most freakish way.

Huey cried in pain as about fifteen small fingers grew out from each of his testicles, and his penis got lost between all the surrounding appendages growing around it.

“Woah! And I thought *I* was screwed! What a freak!” Said Angelous.

The previously handsome boy’s face was now a shitload of fingers squirming in every direction. His eyes got buried below the fingers, making it hard for him to watch where he was going. The freak mass of fingers moved around aimlessly and everybody tried to stay away from the monster.

“What the hell happened to him?!” Wondered one of the onlookers.

Cain took out a notebook from inside his robe and scribbled some notes. “I see…Interesting… Just as I suspected, the bodily fluids of a fingerspine are a great remedy for broken fingers. Now I just need to find someway to stop the regrowth from going overboard. Yes, this really helps with my investigation…”

One of the soldier’s eyes got wide-eyed. “Did he say ‘fingerspine’? Those fleshy porcupine-like monsters from up north?…Holy shit! They’re highly poisonous!”

Indeed. Fingerspines were very poisonous creatures. A single drop excreted from one of their numerous fingers would be enough to kill a full-grown orc. These little creatures from the frozen lands of the north hardly ever attacked anyone however and only excreted poison when they felt really threatened.

Huey, now looking like a giant biped fingerspine blindly stumbling his way around the pub, wasn’t actually a real fingerspine and as such was completely unable to excrete any sort of poison. In other words, the freakish mass of fingers traversing the room was in fact completely and utterly harmless.

But of course, none of the soldiers suspected this fact.

“Get outta my way!” Said one of the soldiers as he bumped into another. “If that thing touches me I’m done for!”

The other soldier, a quite heavy fellow, tumbled down falling in the middle of the way to the exit.

“What?! Hey! You’re blocking the door! Get away! We have to get out of here!” One soldier screamed unsheathing his sword.

“That fat guy is surely with those wizard freaks! Kill him before it turns into another monster!”

“What, you joking?! That’s my friend! Obviously *YOU* are one of them! Aiyyaa!” Another soldier said stabbing another in the back.

“I have wife and kids unlike most of you! I have to get out of here first!” Said an archer. He took out his bow and shoot one of his comrades in the eye.

“OH LORDS MY EYE!” Cried the wounded soldier taking out his axe and swinging it back and forth, detached arms and legs flying out all across the place.

“AHHHH! DON’T GO NEAR ME!” Screamed another soldier as Huey approached him, blindly looking for help. “I’D RATHER DIE LESS PAINFULLY!” And so the soldier stabbed himself in the chest.

Between all the bloody chaos, Angelus was pissed at the soldiers’ incompetence. “You useless idiots! Don’t you see Cain is manipulating all of you into… Hey! What’re you up to…?!”

“You thirsty big guy?” Cain had said offering the dumb orc a drink, which he was now pleasantly drinking like a little baby having his feeding bottle. Of course, the stupid biped with his pants down couldn’t read the label on the bottle, which clearly read ‘Porky’s Special Fire-Hot Sauce’.

The anus got really scared. “No! You stupid orc! Don’t drink that! You’re not the one who’s going to taste it coming all right out! As your master I order you to stop! NOOOOOOO!” The satisfied orc’s stomach grumbled. “…Okay…Urgh…You got lucky this time, Cain! But…*Burp* I swear I’ll have my revenge…Someday…Ughh!!” The orc, holding his trembling ass in a tight grip, tactically retreated from the pub and into the nearest outhouse.

“Alright, that got fixed easily enough. And I barely had to move a muscle.” Said Cain cleaning the dust off his hands. The mage sat down on his seat once again and called out for the cook with a snap of his fingers.

The fat hog-faced man came out from the kitchen with his eyes on fire. He seemed annoyed by all the noise. “Where da’ hell iz dat’ fire-hot sauce? And what the hell is up with the racket? I get into da’ kitchen for five minutes and everyone’s all…Whoa!” Yelled Porky before he caught a glimpse of the state of the pub. The entire place was up to the ceiling filled with bloody viscera and lost body parts. There was a big hole in the window from which a monstrous mass of fingers had made his escape from. Flies were hovering over the corpses of the soldiers who hadn’t had the good fortune of running away while they could. There was a trail of orc diarrhea all over the entrance. The decorations for Augustus Septum’s retirement party were all destroyed, and no sign of Augustus himself. Apart from the flies, the mage with the cooky-grin, and a small chubby rat that Porky had no reservations in stomping it immediately with his huge foot at first sight, there was no sign of life in his pub.

And worst of all, none of the soldiers had paid their tab.

“So, Porky, I guess it’s finally my turn for that glass of wine, uhm?” The mage said, glad his plan had been a total success.

“Don’t cha’ eva’ put a foot in here ever again you fuckin’ prick!” Porky said hitting hitting Cain in the face with a pan.

***

“That surely was an unfortunate night out.” Said Cain, his face still red from his injury, as he rode his horse the way back. “I won’t bore you with unnecessary details, but I didn’t end up drinking a single drop of wine at the end. Such a poor customer service…”

The night was pretty and the streets were very quiet. Apparently the villagers had been ordered to stay home until the extremely dangerous fingerspine on the loose was hunted down by the authorities. The mage smiled and looked at the horse. “Still, your training is progressing at an insane speed. I’ll teach you something very interesting in the next lesson, I tell you. You’re gonna enjoy it a lot. And the best part is, your cockcheese is completely gone. I made sure to give a generous tip to the boy who washed you. I’m sure you really enjoyed your horse-wash experience, didn’t you? Hahaha…”

The horse just kept on trotting. That made Cain uncomfortable. Usually he’d feel the boy’s soul whinning at the humiliation he was suffering by now.

Cain got off the horse and looked at its butt. Just as he suspected, Lucius’ Apprentice’s Mark wasn’t there.

“Whoops. Wrong horse.”