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I'm Surrounded by Idiots

Chapter 1

“So if you pay close attention to the paper in front of you, you will see a diagram showing which part of the tongue is responsible for each kind of ta—"

The teacher paused mid-sentence as a loud groan echoed from the back of the class. One of her male students had let his forehead thump onto his desk, causing his black baseball cap to tumble off and hit the ground with a clatter.

“Is there a problem, Conner?" the teacher asked, her tone slightly peeved. “You can find a spot in the hall if the lesson is sooo boring," she sneered. Even though her face was slightly obstructed by the mask she was wearing, her eyes still expressed enough emotion.

Conner lifted his head, locking eyes with her. “You can't be serious," he chuckled, disbelief coloring his tone.

“Serious about what?" the teacher said, her irritation mounting.

“This!" Conner exclaimed, slapping the paper with the back of his hand. “What dollar tree, discount scientist discovered this and had it approved for our education system?!" He glared at the tongue map diagram. “This study was debunked YEARS ago!"

“You can take your things and wait in the hall for this lesson to be over!" the teacher snapped, her patience gone.

Conner chuckled, collecting his things. As he left, whispers and mutters followed him. His large, athletic build made blending in impossible, and his confrontational nature ensured everyone knew him.

“How on Earth do you put up with him twenty-four-seven, Daniella?" someone chuckled from the middle row as the door closed.

“I just do!" Daniella retorted. She, a black quadrupedal dragon with a slightly wedge shaped head and elongated snout, about the size of a small horse, with a dark maroon underbelly and crimson speckles on her neck and chin. Her bright crimson eyes narrowed. Her voice, distinctly inhuman yet feminine, matched her softer facial structure and swept-back ebony horns with tubular black pointed ears that sat just behind her horns, clearly marking her as female.

“Pfff, and you two are so quick to correct someone if they think you and him are dating," the same classmate scoffed.

Daniella growled, baring her teeth to expose dark purple gums and bright white serrated teeth. “Watch your tone… human!" A wisp of smoke curled from her nostril. With her being at a distance from the rest of her classmates, the teacher had allowed her to remove her own mask.

“That's enough," the teacher stated firmly. “Unless you want to join your friend in the hall…"

Daniella sighed, resting her forepaws on the lab table. She tuned the teacher out, knowing the lesson was completely wrong.

…

“As if I am gonna sit in the hall," Conner thought, zipping up his bag and walking away. “And fuck this mask mandate," he groaned, ripping the black mask of his face. He couldn't care less about standing in the hall or about all the paranoia about the most recent pandemic, he knew he had immunity.

“This is a good time to see how good it is at mimicking voices," he chuckled, heading down the stairs and out the main entrance.

In the parking lot, his eyes fell on a sporty, blacked-out car with a raised wing on the trunk. A birthday gift from his father.

Conner's father had warned him not to modify the car, but Conner didn't listen, buying his father a brand-new ATV that cost twice the car's warranty to silence him.

He sighed, masked his phone number, and dialed the school. Holding his other hand near what looked like a watch on his wrist, a green light blinked on the screen.

“Hi there, this is Catherine Stephens, and I'm calling to let you know that Daniella SannNord and Conner Stephens have permission to leave school for the day," a voice identical to his mother's spoke.

“Conner and Daniella are being signed out?" the secretary asked.

“Yes, an important family matter," the voice confirmed.

“Alright, I'll inform their teacher."

“Take care," the fake Catherine said cheerily.

“You too," the secretary responded. Conner hung up quickly, stifling a laugh.

“That worked too fucking well!" he snickered, a sinister grin spreading across his face.

He put his phone away and turned to his car's tinted windshield, scrutinizing his reflection. “Would be nice if my facial hair grew faster," he grunted, noting his goatee and mustache. “Still more than most kids my age," he chuckled. He spent a few more seconds looking at the face he called his own. He was a fairly attractive male with white skin, short brown hair in a high fade hairstyle, vivid green eyes and three small facial scars, his resting bitch face on the other hand was definitely a drawback.

The bell rang, signaling lunch. He turned as Daniella exited the school, a confused and concerned look in her eyes. A black oily cloud of smoke seeped out from between the mask she wore and her face before it quickly caught fire and burned away

“Did something happen?" she asked, approaching him.

“Nah," Conner chuckled, unlocking the car and tossing his backpack into the backseat. Looking over at Daniella, he again noticed how much bigger she was than him. Of course she wasn't too big to fit in his car, but standing on all fours, her shoulders were about level with his chest and the top of her head reached just above his jawline. Sitting on her haunches though, her head was easily over half a foot higher than his.

“What?" Daniella asked, bewildered, as she put her own bag in the back.

Conner got into the driver's seat and closed the door, while Daniella settled into her custom-made passenger seat, a requirement so that her large size could actually fit in the car.

“Conner!" Daniella exclaimed, “What is going on?"

“Absolutely nothing, Ella," he chuckled, starting the car. The engine roared to life, drawing stares from outside.

As Conner put the car in gear, Daniella watched the needles on the dash drop slightly from the warm-up RPMs.

“So, are you gonna tell me what you did?" she asked, peeved, as Conner drove to the exit.

Conner smirked, tapping his watch. “Replaying last recorded data entry," an artificial-sounding female voice said, and the phone call with the secretary played over Bluetooth.

Daniella stared in disbelief as Conner signaled and pulled onto the road.

He slowed to a crawl and shifted into neutral. Daniella immediately focused on the impending neutral drop right in front of the school.

“Conner…" Daniella whined as the RPMs climbed higher. The needles moved left as the RPMs soared.

“Conner, so help me Go-AHHHHHHHH!" Daniella screamed as Conner shifted into first, the car taking off with squealing tires and a roaring engine.

“You are such an asshole!" Daniella shouted as Conner let off the gas, causing a loud whistlely sputter and backfire.

“I know!" Conner grinned, knowing the dragon next to him might kick his ass when they got home.

…

Conner parked in the garage and shut off the car, sighing. He cocked an eyebrow at the silence.

“Well, shit," he muttered, seeing Daniella's narrowed eyes boring into him. After peeling away from the school, he had made an effort to drive like a maniac, much to Daniella's dismay.

He hastily unbuckled and flung his door open, leaping over the hood headfirst into a roll.

Daniella blinked in shock before quickly exiting and chasing after him. She paused briefly, noticing the car doors closing on their own.

“That's odd…" she thought, dashing into the house after Conner.

Conner flung open the door connecting the garage to the rest of the large house, startling a black dragon lounging in the living room.

“What are you doing home already?" the dragon asked, his voice carrying a deep, masculine draconic accent.

“Can't talk right now, Aeros. I might have pissed off your daughter by driving like a maniac!" Conner shouted as he dashed through the living room, Daniella hot on his heels.

Aeros sighed as the human and dragon sped past. “Those two," he chuckled to himself, shaking his head before returning his focus to the laptop on the table in front of him.

“Maybe driving like an asshole wasn't the brightest idea," Conner thought with a smirk as he burst out the back door into the sprawling backyard of the estate shared by his parents and Daniella's.

“I have around three hundred acres of forest to lose the dragon in," Conner chuckled aloud as he leapt into the tall grass surrounding the house. His father only mowed a one hundred-meter radius around the house; beyond that lay fields of wild grass, marshland, and dense, possibly virgin forest.

Conner slowed his sprint, sliding into a patch of tall grass and crouching down. “Where the hell did she go?" he thought, glancing around. Daniella was nowhere to be seen.

His heart sank as the hairs on the back of his neck stood on end. He slowly turned, just in time to see a black blur lunging at him from the tall grass.

“OOF!" Conner grunted as he was bowled over by a black scaly mass around twice his size.

Daniella leaned her head down, pinning Conner with her forepaws on his wrists and her haunches firmly planted above his knees.

Conner saw her lips curl into a snarl. “You're a fucking asshole," Daniella growled, her nose touching his before she licked his forehead. “Even though you drive me nuts, I can't help but love your stubborn ass," she chuckled, releasing him and stepping back.

Conner chuckled before brushing himself off and getting up. “You haven't gotten sick of my shit yet so I think I'll keep being an asshole," Conner said with a grin before turning back to the house and trudging through the long grass.

Daniella rolled her eyes before following after her best friend. “Oh I love you more than you could even imagine," she sighed to herself.

…

Conner was heavily engrossed with something on his computer when the door to his bedroom opened.

“Have you seen my phone?" Daniella asked as she walked in and closed the door behind her.

Conner chuckled before turning to the dragoness. “Your bag and harness should be next to my bed on the left side."

Daniella rolled her eyes before walking over to Conner's desk and reaching for one of the drawers. She was suspicious that he might have hid her phone.

“Wait! Don't open… that." Conner reached out to stop her, but it was too late.

Daniella's eyes widened in horror at not one, not two, but four handguns in the drawer. “Holy fucking shit, Conner!" Daniella exclaimed, picking up the first one. “What's this!?" she growled.

“A Glock forty-five…" Conner said, trying to make himself smaller.

“And this one?"

“Springfield nineteen eleven, chambered in forty-five."

Daniella lifted the third and held it out, glaring at Conner.

“That one is a Glock nineteen, and the last one, the revolver, is a Smith & Wesson five hundred magnum."

“How the fuck did you get your hands on any of these?" Daniella asked, bewildered as she examined the four handguns. Each had a modernized, almost futuristic design with a red dot sight and a small under-barrel flashlight.

“I'd really rather not say," Conner chuckled nervously, averting his gaze.

Daniella sighed, carefully placing each pistol back in the drawer and closing it. “You don't even have your gun license yet. You're not even old enough." She looked at Conner again before shaking her head and walking over to her bag next to his bed.

“What kind of friend would I be if I snitched on you?" Daniella asked rhetorically, pulling her phone and laptop out of her bag and crawling onto Conner's bed. “Can I at least ask how you even got in contact with people who could get illegal firearms?" she asked, cocking her head.

“You know how my dad has me overseeing his mining company?" Conner turned his chair to face her.

“Yeah?"

“Well, I overheard some of the workers talking about buying an illegal firearm from a guy."

“Mmhmm." Daniella nodded for him to continue.

“I, of course, was on-site that day, so I messaged the guy about 'having something important to talk about,'" Conner said with air quotes. “When he stepped into the foreman's office, I slid him a note detailing what I wanted."

“How did he react?" Daniella asked curiously.

“He was shocked at first and went to ask, so I just told him I overheard his conversation from five minutes ago and asked if he could get them, and he nodded." Conner smirked.

Daniella stared at him, her expression a mix of concern and frustration. “You're playing a dangerous game, Conner. If anyone finds out, you could be in serious trouble."

Conner's smirk faded slightly. “I know, but I wanted them. For protection and sport shooting. And you know how much I love hunting. It's not just about the thrill, it's about being prepared for anything."

Daniella sighed, crawling to the end of the bed. “Just be careful, okay? I don't want to see you get hurt."

Conner nodded, feeling a pang of guilt. “I will, Ella. Promise." He sighed before turning back to his computer and opening up something that displayed a chart or graph. “I still have two more guns he hasn't gotten me quite yet."

“Conner…" Daniella whined, “You are seriously playing with fire."

“These ones are more for sport shooting and to just have," Conner reassured the dragon.

“And what other two guns are you getting from the guy?" Daniella asked with a sigh.

“A mag-fed semi-automatic shotgun and an assault rifle."

“Jesus Christ, Conner." Daniella sighed, closing her eyes. “Just don't do anything stupid, okay?"

“I won't," Conner said before getting busy with his computer once again.

After a few minutes Daniella watched as Conner let out a frustrated sigh and clenched his hand into a fist. His veins bulged slightly and glowed a neon purple before the colour faded as he let out a deep breath.

“You alright?" Daniella asked, noticing the faint pulse of purple in her own veins and the shiver that ran up her spine.

“One of my stocks just lost a value of fifty grand." Conner sighed before thumping his head on his desk.

“You lost fifty thousand dollars?!" Daniella gasped.

“No, thankfully not. I'm still up two hundred grand, but this still sucks." Conner groaned before pulling up another tab on his second monitor. “Fuck," he muttered, seeing the drop likely to continue. “Martha already sold her share," he added.

“What are you doing?" Daniella asked.

“I'm selling this stock before it loses any more value," Conner explained, quickly moving to withdraw his money and deposit it into another account.

Daniella watched as Conner sifted through a few accounts before looking back at his trading portfolio. Her mouth fell open, seeing the eye watering value of the shares he held.

“Transfer encryption: completed," a message flashed up on his second monitor.

“Tax this, assholes," Conner muttered as he executed a few more transactions that Daniella barely understood.

“Who taught you about stocks and trading?" Daniella asked in shock.

“My uncle and grandfather taught my father and I a lot. Then we started teaching each other as we went," Conner said proudly, making another transfer.

“What did you just do there?" Daniella asked.

“Deposited my money into an account that doesn't exist according to the Canadian government," Conner chuckled.

“So you not only own illegal firearms but also commit tax evasion?" Daniella laughed.

Conner glared at her before pulling up the current Prime Minister's net worth before he started his first term. “You see how he had a net worth of two hundred fifty grand in twenty fifteen?" Conner grumbled before showing her the PM's current net worth. “Oh lookie here! Just over twenty million in five years."

“Oh…" Daniella stared blankly at the list of articles detailing the Prime Minister's reckless spending of taxpayers' money.

“Not paying taxes so he can blow it on another renovation for his cottage," Conner grumbled before closing his stock portfolio and opening up a tab with lines of code.

…

*Knock!* *Knock!* *Knock!*

“Moral Code file; Analyzed…. Downloading." A robotic female voice said from Conner's computer speakers.

*Knock!* *Knock!* *Knock!*

“Conner, you in there?" a male human voice asked from the other side of Conner's bedroom door.

“Yes dad?" Conner asked as he continued to work on some kind of programming on his computer.

The door to his bedroom opened and in stepped Conner's father, a late thirties man who looked to be in his late twenties to early thirties with a cleanly shaven face and very very short brown hair. It was clear that the man was Conner's father but Conner's eyes were a vivid green rather than a silvery greenish grey like his father.

“Something was discovered at dig site sixteen that the workers really want us to come check out." Conner's father said with a bit of urgency in his voice.

“Uhmm, you want me to come with?" Conner asked with uncertainty.

“What do you think?" His father grunted rhetorically.

“Alrighty then," Conner said with a sigh before locking his computer but not shutting it down.

“Why don't we take your car and see if Daniella is willing to join us." The man said while looking over to the dragon who was too busy with her laptop to have noticed Conner's father walking in.

“Daniella?"

The dragoness jumped slightly before pulling an earbud out, “Yes Jason?" she asked.

“Conner and I are taking a trip down to site sixteen for the mining company, care to join us?" Jason asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Uhh, sure!" Daniella agreed with way more enthusiasm than Conner did. Her laptop closed with a soft clunk as she put away her wireless earbuds.

Daniella was off the bed and out the bedroom door before Conner was even out of his chair.

“That's the kind of enthusiasm I wish you had sometimes," Jason sighed.

Conner rolled his eyes before getting up and grabbing his car keys. “I gotta grab something real quick, hold on." Conner said as he opened his closet door that was to the right of his large desk.

“I'll be in the garage waiting," Jason called as he left Conner's bedroom.

Conner poked his head out of his closet before opening the top right drawer on his desk and grabbing the Glock nineteen, he loaded a magazine into the magwell before darting into the closet with the pistol aimed at the floor and his finger off the trigger.

He grabbed a belt holster and slipped the holster down the front of his pants, locking the pistol in the holster. Once he was positive he had secured the handgun, he stepped over to where all his pants were hung and opened a safe. He pushed aside five sizable bars of gold and grabbed a fairly large envelope before locking the safe and stepping away.

“Watch today of all fucking days I get pulled over and patted down." Conner thought to himself as he stepped out of his closet and grabbed two extra magazines from the drawer below the one that held his handguns. He slipped the extra mags into slots in his holster before locking both drawers in his desk and exiting his room, locking his bedroom door behind him.