Oh, College: Time to Go to Class!
LAST TIME ON OH, COLLEGE: Albus and his new bi buddy get settled in, and THE FUTURE IS SEALED! BAH DAH DAH!!! After meeting his new roommate, having plenty of awkward moments, and finally going to bed on the last day before classes began, he actually...
Tales of Zootopia: Boss Guillermo
Boss Guillermo's real name is Guillermo del Mujer y Medici, and he was born in Mexico near the border. From an early age, he was told that Chihuahuas couldn't fight for themselves. He was determined to disprove that notion, no matter what. Eventually,...
Oh, College: How it All Went Right
There it was. There was the campus for Lionheart University. Albus knew right away what he was going there to accomplish. He wanted to become a businessman, and achieve exactly the success that people where he grew up said he could never have, and...
Tales of Zootopia: My Parents
It was about 12 hours after the Night Howler incident was finally over when the story started. My parents, just friends at the time, Taurin Blacksad, who looks like a more muscular version of me, and Edna Kane, a white cat, wanted to go to Zootopia. My...
Just Once: Subways are Bullshit
LAST TIME ON JUST ONCE: Exactly how your first date ISN'T supposed to go, complete with still being in the friendzone at the end of it "I kind of have to go somewhere," Jem said, "so I can't really drop you off back at home." "It's alright! I'm gonna...
Just Once: Time for an Awkward Coffee Shop Date
LAST TIME ON JUST ONCE: Albus lost his virginity! Woo! \*high fives audience\* After a coffee-less breakfast, Albus and Jem decided to get some coffee. Also, Albus wanted one of your usual coffee shop's delicious rice crispies. Thus, they got in Jem's...
Just Once: Guess Who Lost His Virginity?
LAST TIME ON JUST ONCE: Imagine a song to the tune of "hotline bling" about being in the friendzone. Then add in the most ironic traumatic childhood experience ever written, and top it off with a true moment of fail, in terms of their telling each...
Tales of Zootopia: Wyclef and Sarah
It all started in high school, where our protagonist, Wyclef Hoover, a white Male Horse with an effeminate body and voice, falls in love with someone from his math class. That person is Sarah Silverfox, a silver Fox, because of course. Just as he's...
Tales of Zootopia: An Explanation
This is basically a series of mostly-unconnected short stories set in Zootopia, maybe with the occasional interaction with someone from the movie. When I saw the movie, I saw Star Wars levels of potential for an expanded universe. Pretty much any kind...
Just Once: Welcome to the Friendzone. Enjoy your stay.
LAST TIME ON JUST ONCE: Guess who the fuck finally showed up? Only three episodes in, and she's already making me and him all emotional. Albus woke up in the bed on his apartment. Jem was laying right next to him, and woke him up by pouring some honey...
Just Once: I. Hate. Board. Meetings.
LAST TIME ON JUST ONCE: Another reason to hate cramped elevators and normal people for Albus. As soon as Albus walked in, he was greeted by a board room full of people in bland business suits sitting at a rectangular table, with a window on the other...
Zero Hour: the Scarlet Freighter
DEBRIEFING, [REDACTED], AKA WOLFY, JUNE 25, 2025 The mission began at 2100 hours. I was deployed on a decrepit freighter out in the Baltics somewhere. The name of the freighter was _Scarlet Rain_, and yes, that is a euphemism for blood. The crew were...