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Oliver wanted desperately to let Sean know he was ok,

loved, and would get better. Sean shook in his arms, his scared tear filled

eyes widening in shock as Oliver's tongue touched him. Then eyes shut tight

like he was fighting back the melancholy that hovered over him since he

arrived, Sean panted a gasping breath and kissed Oliver back.Oliver rolled Sean on top of him as they tasted the

sadness, desire, and hopes of each other's cheeks, lips, and panting breaths.Oliver felt his clothes being torn off him, in Sean's

unbridled desperation.Their trapped excitements begged for release as Oliver

was stripped more and more. He reached to unbutton Sean's shirt but Sean quickly

pinned his paws above his head, kissing him again.Oliver just went with it, Sean could do as he wanted. Oliver

only wanted Sean to feel free and loved, with heart racing he felt happier and

hotter than he had ever been.Their hips both pleasantly and painfully pressing

together in the growing urgency."I want you Oliver!""Please Sean, I want you too!"Sean froze atop Oliver when they spoke.Oliver unbuttoned the top button of Sean's shirt then

notice Sean was still frozen and staring with an unfixed expression over their

heads.Oliver felt Sean's hardness soften in his pants, "Sean

are you ok?""No we can't..." he said distantly."Sean its ok," Oliver said."No, no it's wrong... I should go, I shouldn't have

come," Sean said."What, but... are you sure?" Oliver said mind

only now catching up.Oliver felt Sean wrench away, then Sean rushed to the

door."Sean wait let's talk about it, I'm here to listen,

you don't have to go," Oliver said while he followed Sean."Yes I do I'm just making things worse for you, I

can't play with your heart or make you sin," Sean said."I don't think I can believe it is a sin if it's for

Love," Oliver said."You lost your family for all of this, it isn't

worth it," Sean said while he hovered by the door."But you said we are family now," Oliver said

cold from head to toe.Sean scrunched his eyes, "just another way I have

failed... I'm sorry." "But I'm calling my family what if they changed...

can you?" Oliver asked."I was changed already and it broke me, I need to

leave," Sean said then turned from him.Oliver reached to stop him but knew he wouldn't, no couldn't

force Sean, it wouldn't be right. He stared at the closed door for a time

clicking his claws together. Shivering with fear and uncertainty he went back to the

living room and redressed. He wished the world were different, easier, he felt Paul's

phone in his pocket bumping against his own."I can't stop him but should I follow him, or call

him?..." Oliver thought.He paced in self-doubt, "I need to do something... I

can call my parents if they could change so could he, that would prove

it."Oliver took out the phones glaring at them skeptically."Prime through everything I have never given up on

you, please guide me," Oliver prayed.He held the phones side by side to make sure the number

was correct. "Should I do it? What does it really prove?" Oliver

said quietly.He hit dial on Paul's phone, pocketing his own.The ringtone clattered harshly against his ears and

anxieties. Again and again, berb, berb, berb, click, "Hello, you've

reached Grandma and Grandpa Cunningham's house leave them a message!" His niece's

voice said.Beep..."Hi... It's Oliver, I'm calling because I was thinking

about all of you and wanted to say I still love you and I miss you. Hopefully

you still love me too... bye."He sat while he thought, "that was a stupid message,

hey it's been years so I thought about you, Prime why can't I have a family

that is a family?" He pocketed Paul's phone still holding his own.Then he texted Xander and then Paul while walking to his

lonely couch.To Xander, "Something's wrong with Sean, I mean really

wrong."To Paul, "I finished with your phone, when do you

want it back?"His pocket, Paul's phone buzzed and he realized the

extent to his distraction.He sat for only a moment then he went back to pacing his

apartment too nervous and unfocused to work."You shouldn't have kissed him, he wasn't ready! But

what else could I have done?... Nothing just be there for him on his terms. Ok,

I can do that but Xander can give me more ideas, maybe I should have gone after

him," Oliver thought.Xander texted, "we are just finishing up the baby

shower for Paul's coworker, Paul and I were the only dudes there, it was kinda

weird, so what's up with Sean?"Oliver wondered if he should tell Xander everything, and

if that might be a betrayal of Sean's trust, but Sean's safety came first. Xander

texted, "Sean's all freaked out about hitting his dad, he dreamed about

that camp, I kissed him and he was talking about how kissing was a sin and he

would only hurt me because he's all damaged, then he ran out of here.""Shit this is Disney land all over again, I'm going

to call him while we head over, we'll be there in like fifteen minutes," Xander

sent.Oliver forced himself to sit and do some analytics for

his newest project to keep his mind busy. He sat staring at his laptop not even

signed in, when Paul and Xander came in the front door."How was I supposed to know that asking about using

an egg incubator is offensive to Avians?" Xander asked Paul."It's like implying they don't love their egg and

abandon it during the day. Some experts blame the prevalence of Avian

distraction and hyperactivity disorder on a lack of pre-hatching

nurturing," Paul said."Those 'experts' sound like idiots to me," Xander

said, "hey Oliver!"Oliver stood and took Paul his phone, "hey guys,

thanks for the phone.""Did you get to talk to them?" Paul asked."No but I left a voice message for the first time,

my niece is on the recording I don't even get to hear mom and dad's voice

anymore," Oliver said.Xander looked as unhappy hearing about his family

situation as Sean had, "I'm not your family family, but like Sean and Paul

here you are welcome to call me when you need someone.""That's what Sean said basically," Oliver said

he felt relieved."Dogs are so loyal, it's such a turn on," Paul said,

then hugged Xander from behind. Paul hidden behind Xander huffed, "why

does everyone need to be so tall.""I'm not tall, I'm on the average side of short for

canids," Xander said, "So Sean didn't answer when I called

either.""Well I'm on the short side of whatever," Paul said

then asked, "So is he... ok?""I don't know," Xander said."No, I don't think so," Oliver said."Maybe we should go find him," Paul said."You might be right, but what if he only needs

space?" Oliver asked."Then we're just annoying friends, I'm going to ask

Neal too," Xander said grabbing his phone and texting Neal wandering down

the hall.Once Xander walked off Paul exploded, "Jill gets

here soon!" "I know it will be great, Xander and Sean will be

shocked," Oliver said. Xander paced back then stood in the kitchen while

he texted."I'm a little shocked," Paul said."You doubted it would happen?" Oliver asked."Yeah the stats weren't great," Paul said then

his pocket buzzed."Hello this is Paul.""Jill why are you crying? Is everything ok?... yeah

I miss you too, but I'll see you so soon, and then everything will be great...

cheer up, yeah, it will be great, why so mopey... missing me is a lame reason

when you're on your way here... fine, where do you want dinner... ok, yeah a

silly question, Purr it is... Love you... oh I have a call coming in.""Hello this is Paul, who may I ask is calling?"Oliver checked friend finder Sean was at City Hall, he wondered

how he was doing and if he should text."Excuse me a single call isn't harassment but verbal

aggressiveness is not appropriate... then block the numbers. Yeah, that's on

your end to take care of... well how dare you threaten, you don't know me but

your behavior isn't appropriate," Paul fused at his phone, Oliver chilled

as he waited. Xander's attention fell on Paul as well."Fine, you can, but know your lawyer would have to

speak with ours, and you'd have to meet in a court room... so stop threatening

and block these numbers if you even care too... I'll pass that along and Prime

Bless you! Though you've done nothing to deserve it on this call!" Paul

yelled into his phone then threw it onto the couch."So that must have been my sister or my dad..."

Oliver said."I'm sorry Oliver they threatened you and me, I

dealt with it all poorly," Paul said."How were they threatening exactly?" Xander asked."An anti-harassment order, Oliver it was your dad,

he said you upset your mom and shouldn't call anymore you are no longer family,"

Paul said.Oliver felt numb, and thought, "I was going to do

something, be there for someone? Wasn't I?..."Then he remembered Easter. Mom set the table."Oliver honey,

where should I put your mail, it's still coming to the house," Mom called

from the kitchen."Weird, I thought

I had it all going to my PO Box on campus," I said as I put on my coat."Honey where

are you going?" Mom asked poking her head around corner to the kitchen."Dad asked me

to pick up heavy cream and fish oils for dinner," I said then checked I

had my keys."Well hurry

back, Danielle and the kids are coming over for family dinner," Mom said."Will do

mom," I said and headed to the car. Cruise was on the radio I sighed

because it had been playing on ever country station but I sang along anyway. When I got to the

store Paul sexted me, "Which tail shot is better this one or this

one?""I'm at the

store, this is not how you're getting me to come out to my family, if I ever

come out to them," I replied."Fine, but I think

it would do you good if you told them," Paul texted."No it probably

wouldn't," I texted then grabbed the cream."So which do

you like?" Paul asked.I review the pics felt

a warm stirring in my pants, then wrote, "Your horrible!""Ah you liked

them both, sweet!" He texted."Yeah but you

live too far away," I texted walking down the baking isle."Well I'm thinking

of Moving to Seattle, when you're done with school you're moving there

right?" Paul asked."Yeah, I will

have more options for tech out there," I texted then headed to check out."Would you

want to date?" Paul asked."I don't know,

we need to meet first, I think, and all that," I texted."Good point,

so how's the Easter celebration with the family coming?" Paul asked."It's just a

family dinner we don't celebrate holidays," I texted."That is so

lame no Christmas!" Paul texted."No Holidays

or Litterdays, but on them I make it a point to talk to family, I'm a bad

witness," I texted."Yes but only

bad Witnesses like my tail so it balances out," Paul messaged."Well I'm

going to have family dinner I'll say hey after," I texted while I climbed

into my car.Cruise was on again

which made me wish I had a sound system that I could plug my phone into.When I got home the

porch was crowded with stuff. I realized it was my suitcase, and bedding. Mom

stepped outside crying with my still wet laundry dripping in a basket. When she

saw me parking she rushed inside. I got out of the car confused at everything. "Why is mom

making a mess," I thought, "Danielle and the kids will be here in

just a few minutes?"The door was

locked, the house was never locked. No one answered the door when I knocked. So

I looked for the hide-a-key. Dad came out when I

got it and said, "You are no longer welcome here, you need to leave.""What the

hell, this isn't funny dad!" I said."Neither is a

life unrepentant," Dad said."Come on its

Family dinner, and I don't know what you're talking about," I said cold

knives sliding down my spine."That is an

utter lie," Dad said, then thrust a FIV and AID alliance Manila envelope

into my chest, along with a large blank empty parcel addressed to mom and me. Everything crumpled

under the force of dad's anger the mess of paper fell to the ground then dad

sternly said, "Get out, I can't have you putting the grand kids at

risk.""Why did you

read my mail?" I asked nub and confused."Does it

matter, we shun you, begone!" Dad said, then went back inside, then

re-locked the door.I cried as I packed

my car, and watched the silhouette in the living room. Then I got behind the

wheel.

Mom

reset the table.