War..War Never Ends
Story by Cederwyn Whitefurr on SoFurry
Rowan, an ex-medic, fought in the last Terran war. This Thompson Gazelle Anthromorph returned home, broken, shattered and despondant, only his lover, a human male named Danirus, keeps the Gazelle from ending the hell that is his fractured mind. Can Danirus find a way to help his lover, before it is too late?
War...War Never Ends...
Chapter One
© Cederwyn Whitefurr
4th July, 2019 – Revised and edited 9th September, 2021.
All Rights Reserved.
Rowan stood on the balcony of his high-set Queenslander home, his dark, soulful eyes gazing out over the distant fields; long stalks of sugar cane gleaming, their tips rustling in some unknown, ancient tongue, their endless ranks seemed to march to the mist shrouded horizon before the Thompson Gazelle flicked a black tipped ear.
He was oblivious to the hyper sonic whine of the mosquitoes that lit on his sensitive ears, forcing him to unconsciously flick them again and again, his eyes staring, transfixed on nothing, not seeing the clouds rumbling and boiling over themselves like a wave on the beach.
Distant flashes briefly leaving purplish spots before his eyes, as in the distance the crackle of thunder echoed off the ranges and the air was as heavy and thick as spoiled milk - each breath felt like he was trying to breathe a misty water...
So lost was he in his own enigmatic mind, he did not hear the distinctive squeal of the rusty iron screen door hinges - his gaze was unfixed, staring...devoid of soul and warmth - as he continued to stare at the distant lightning, as a single tear slid down his furred muzzle and dripped to the timber floor, his memories turning inwards - resurfacing - as the distant thunder and lightning crashed and roared - sounding like distant artillery fire....
Rowan suddenly screamed, then clawed at his head, as if he could tear the very thoughts from his tortured mind and dash them onto the ground....
*
The screams...the screams...the screams in the jungle...
"MEDIC - I NEED A GOD DAMNED MEDIC..." Come the screaming voice, who it belonged too, who knew, Rowan grasped his first aid kit in his paw, slapping his helm on and began running towards the voice, through the blood, the body parts littering the ground.
None of it mattered - bullets ricocheted and found fur and flesh alike, as he staggered...the shriek of an artillery shell smashing into their lines, the explosion that tore soldiers apart like confetti...
Artillery from behind their lines belched smoke and fire in a thunderous cacophony...none of it Rowan heard, as he ran towards the soldier who crouched next to another one, who lay screaming and writhing in agony. Rowan didn't even hear the whistling scream of a incoming mortar - it thudding into the torn and bloodied earth mere feet from the terrified Gazelle medic...
*
Time seemed to freeze itself – Rowan felt his heartbeat slow – a single thud against his ribs..
*
A young soldier threw himself over the mortar, valiantly sacrificing himself, to save the lives of his brothers in arms; it exploded, the white hot shrapnel flying in all directions.
More were cut down by the flying chunks of searing hot metal - yet the gazelle remained unharmed - not even a single hair was singed - but what seared into his mind wasn't the explosion - but watching this nameless - and to be forgotten - soldier come apart like some child’s pinata...
*
Then his heart thumped again...and again...and again...
*
Rowan shrieked, his scream primal in it terror and fear, before his paw slashed out, barely missing the human who had moved up behind him and gently touched his shoulder.
With a startled squeal, the man fell backwards, crashing against the timber wall, his eyes widening in terror as the irrational Gazelle marched on him, dewlaps curled back, eyes blazing with rage and hate.
“Rowan my love – stop!” Danirus screamed at him, but the Gazelle was lost in the horrors of his own mind, as he kept advancing implacably. “Rowan, my love! Please, stop! Hear me...It's me, Danirus, your lover...”
Without warning, the Gazelle grasped Darius in a crushing hug as he broke into heart-wrenching sobs.
Danirus stood, holding Rowan, feeling the tears drip onto his shoulder.
“I hate this part of you love,” Darius whispered, as he caressed the Gazelle's neck. “What I would give to take away your horrors...”
A deep tremble ran through the Gazelle's body, before he shuddered and sniffled, timidly embracing his lover and licking his cheek, then holding him tight. As Danirus began sliding his hands down the Gazelle's back, he suddenly felt Rowan begin trembling.
“STOP THAT!” Rowan snapped, then slammed a cloven hoof down and flinched away, his ears snapping backwards and he shuddered.
Danirus blinked, slightly hurt by the savage reaction from his partner, before he gently slipped his hands around the Gazelle's hips and held him, stroking his chest in alternating up and down strokes, feeling the tense musculature and the trembling from the Gazelle's body.
“Its not you - “ Rowan whispered, as he shivered again and a single tear spilled down his cheek. “It was never you my love...
*
Rowan sniffled, the tears glistening in his eyes, before he turned away and crept back into the house, before his plaintive cries echoed forth as he sobbed like a heartbroken fawn. Danirus followed a moment later, before he walked in, then gently placed his hand on the Gazelle's shoulder.
“Honey, please...let me in, let me help you! I love you so much, and you're so hurt, so – broken. Yet you keep it all inside you, where it will poison your mind and your heart!”
Without warning, Rowan spun about, then grabbed Danirus and held him tight, his hooflets digging into the humans back as it was almost like a dam wall broke. Rowan burst into hysterical sobbing, holding his beloved partner, as Danirus held him in turn, trying to comfort the hysterical Gazelle.
“I – can not tell you - “ Rowan's voice cracked, as he shook harder, the emotions raw and his defences crumbled. “You've never experienced the – the horrors of war. I love you so much Danirus, but – you can not empathise with what I have seen, words can not be found to describe the – the...”
“The atrocities, the senselessness of it all?” Danirus whispered, as he stood on his toes and gently kissed Rowan's left ear.
“Even that – can't encompass it...” Rowan sobbed brokenheartedly.
“I can't take away what you must have as memories my beloved, I would have no right! What happened to you, to those you cared for,, No, nobody can take that away from you. I just want you to know my beloved, sweet, gentle lover – you're loved and cared for. If I can ever do anything, even for a second, to help you, then please – tell me?”
Rowan nodded, holding Danirus tightly, as he kept crying in the crushing depths of his sorrow. Danirus had no answers, nothing he could say, would help, all he could do was surrender himself, willingly and fully, to his Gazelle lover – and give him the strength and love he so needed.
To Be Continued...