FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

Time Together, Time Apart

Part seven of seven

---

Written by Arian Mabe (Amethyst Mare)

Commissioned by Adagiodajiang

_ _

_ _

Time passed. Sandor could not have said how much.

Even though he had curled up into himself, a tight ball of fur and emotions, he had still watched everything that the ancient being had played out for him, the same thing over and over again. He thought that the ancient being might have changed some things, putting the two of them in different locations, but he was not so sure. For, even if he had not been looking, he could still feel her bones cracking under his jaws, how her fragile, delicate body and neck had snapped in the overcoming wrath of his vines wrapping around her.

He'd thrown up, but that was the least of the fox's worries. Fury and sadness and upset churned in his stomach, wet sand clinging to his cheek.

If I never fell in love with her, he thought bitterly, I would never have had to feel like this. Maybe I would never have encountered the evil of the tree... Maybe things would have been different.

_ _

Yet he only blamed Alyssa in a part of his mind that was hunting for something, anything, to blame, to try to put just a little bit of the pain that he was on someone else, someone that he could blame for it all.

It wasn't her fault, not really. It was not even his fault, though only in a small way for hiding things from her, from not being open and honest with her. But that was a different thing entirely, for the poison had been building up in his veins, more and more, over the time that had passed since the encounter with the evil tree. He would never, not honestly, regret having survived the encounter, though Sandor could never have known just what the repercussions of having dealt with it could have been.

Broken and sobbing, his cheeks wet with tears that he did not remember crying, Sandor heaved and gulped for air, loathing the sickness churning in his stomach. He just couldn't take it, seeing Alyssa, over and over again, broken and bleeding, devoured by him.

"And you think you're so strong."

The ancient being mocked him, sneering, her lips twitching as she advanced on him. Dully, the fox watched her hooves grow closer and closer, until they were nothing more than a few inches from his face. Still, he did not move, pressing his face into the ground, something clinging to his fur, though Sandor did not have the strength or the energy to lift his head, not even to wonder at what it was.

"Useless. Weak. Pathetic. All mortals, like you... All the same, Sandor. You're not even worth a name. And, still, you'll ask for this medicine back from me, because you want to live, won't you? You know that holding onto this and devouring more, prolonging everything, will cause the ultimate to happen, but you'll be selfish and do it anyway."

Sandor growled, grinding his teeth together, though only a raspy sound passed his lips. Yes, he would...but it wasn't as if he was going to sit around and not look for a cure, no! He would not devour Alyssa; he would not devour anyone again...

But the latter was not something that he could promise, not to anyone.

"Please..." He whispered hoarsely, managing to get onto all fours, his forehead pressed into the ground in the most demeaning, humiliating, subjugating position that he could pull from his mind. "Please... Give them back to me... I need... I need the pills... Please, please, let me have them... I need to control myself..."

"Huh. You break too easily..."

Already, she seemed bored of him, though Sandor could not have said whether that was a good thing or not. He didn't want her to just run away with the pills...

The ancient being looked pityingly down at him, her lips twisting in an expression that he did not recognise. Maybe she saw more of him than even Sandor realised, but that was not for the fox to know. If he had no way to know, it could not be of particular importance to him - not when he had far more pressing concerns to stress his mind.

"You and that silly fawn belong together... For you are just one and the same in terms of your selfishness, wrapped up in your vines and your own stupid little corner of the world."

Sandor didn't bother asking her what that meant. He didn't think that he was honestly going to get an answer anyway.

She could think what she liked. Even if his stomach sank, knowing that his goal and the one that he had thought would be able to cure him was simply refusing to do so.

They had been right about the ancient being all along. And there he had been, too blinded by the notion of finding a cure, to see the warning signs laid out before him.

She scoffed and reared her forelegs up, bringing them down on his head in a swift, pounding stomp. Sandor groaned as her cloven hooves connected with his skull, pain blistering through, though it seemed that she didn't do more than make his ears ring, a small trickle of blood marking his white fur. She must have caught his skin with the edge of one of her hooves, but it was no more than a scratch, the impact leaving his head pounding with a dull throb.

Her grin as he groaned, however, told Sandor all that he needed to know about her state of mind, what the ancient being felt. And it was wrong, so very wrong, for a being to take such pleasure in the suffering of others.

If there was ever a reason for Sandor to resist the devouring, that was it. For he ever wanted to break that much, to go so far that he twisted into tragedy, falling into the depths of despair, not to take pleasure in the suffering and the pain of others.

Because he could go there, if he wanted to. It would be so easy to give in to it... But he would not. He could not.

And that was exactly what the fox had to hang onto.

"Hm."

The ancient being did not even spare him a word as she dropped the two small jars of his medicine on the beach. One rattled slightly where it was filled less than the other, fewer pills inside, though both were pretty full. He clenched his jaw, steeling his resolve against the wrenching sobs that threatened to rip from his lungs still, from all that he had been forced to see and endure.

The jars sat in the sand, indenting it lightly, and he fixed his eyes on them, wheezing as he raked in air.

"Don't even think about me healing you, about coming to me again," she said, looking down her nose at him. "I'll never do it. The cure is only known to me and I will never_share it with you. You never had a chance. If you bother me, I will set you even further on your path to be broken, to turn into the devouring and the poison itself that runs through your body. I will _hasten your tragedy. And I will make exactly what you saw in my realm, your vision, happen."

She paused, the ghost of a sickly smile flitting over her lips.

"And I do look forward to seeing how my lives you take, how many losses you feel the stab of... Be sure to scream for me, Sandor, because I will be listening..."

She turned, disappearing, though the fox did not watch her leave. She was not his, not his doe-taur, and could never match up to Alyssa.

That was something that the ancient being would never know, clearly, the love that he held for his sweetheart, everything good she had done for him that had brought out the better and better sides of him, more and more. For that had to be what the ancient being, perhaps through no fault of her own after so many long, gruelling years, was missing: the closeness of another and a relationship. It did not have to be romantic, of course not, but he wanted to empathise with her desperately, not to think of her as downright evil.

Or maybe the lesson there was that good and evil went hand in hand, always needing to be in a little kind of balance, the scales tipping first one way and then the other, always keeping the two in balance. Where there was good, there was also evil, and that would never change. Her experiences in life were what had shaped her and Sandor felt still that he needed to have some sympathy and empathy for her.

Or else he would end up just like her, just like the ancient being. And he could never, ever have that.

Struggling, his whole body aching as if he had been broken and bruised and beaten and battered, he reached out for the pills, the jar closing into his hand. He curled his fingers around the cool glass and exhaled lightly, pushing the broken images of Alyssa from his mind.

In their time together and their time apart, everything that he had ever done had been for his doe-taur.

And it would continue to be, as ever, for Alyssa.

*

Alyssa woke suddenly, the bed cold beside her. Her heart pounded, juddering, and she reached for Sandor - only to find the rough bark of a wilting, gnarled tree beside her.

"What in the heaven?"

She pulled back from it, the leaves from the tree, which had to have come from Sandor's magic, dropping and falling, brown and dying. Her stomach churned and, for a moment, she felt sick, pressing a shaking hand to her lips in case she was going to lose the contents of her stomach.

Yet just when anger was set to blister through her, the door opened - and Sandor appeared.

"Good morning," he said softly, wagging his white tail. "It's okay... I just went out to get breakfast, early, for you. I thought you would like it, but I didn't mean for you to be awake when I came back. I hope I didn't worry you, darling."

She paused and smiled, allowing the anger to dissipate. It made sense to her, after thinking that he had ghosted her again and disappeared without a trace, so she was not going to feel bad for being angry, however briefly. There was still work to be done in their relationship, she could see, but everything would come in time, with work, together, Alyssa was sure of it.

In fact, the doe-taur was feeling a lot more positive than she had been in a long time.

He laid out the breakfast on the chest at the foot of the bread, pastries and fruits and cheeses all set out for both of them. Of course, Alyssa still ate a vegetarian diet, though there were some cheeses that her digestive system was comfortable consuming, milk too.

"Do you want to eat breakfast here too, Sandor?" She asked. "It was very sweet of you to get breakfast, I thought you were gone."

A strange look crossed his face, the fox's lips smiling, but only faintly.

"Ah, no, thank you, Alyssa, I picked up a sausage bun when I was collecting breakfast for you, I was pretty hungry. But, now I am full."

She didn't think anything more of his words. If she had known where her lover had been the night before, she would have thought differently.

Alyssa ate patiently, letting herself savour every bite. Her life had slowed down somewhat in her time apart from Sandor, though that was not so much of a bad thing, no. It just let her experience the world differently, seeing that there was more to be absorbed than studying and always trying to survive. There was enjoyment to be had too and pleasure that she could be bold enough to take for herself, for her life was not to be dictated by the fact that she was a taur.

"Thank you, Sandor," she said, on finishing her meal. "That was amazing. I don't think I've ever even had a stoned fruit like that... Did you happen to get the name of it?"

He shook his head, lips soft with a smile.

"No, sorry, sweetheart..." He chuckled and a cheeky glint entered his eye. "But there is one thing that you haven't eaten yet."

He had been standing and, without thinking, drew on a little of his cheeky wit, what had come so naturally to him before, pressing the softness at his crotch against her cheek. He had only meant to tease her, to nudge her, for he was fresh and clean in a change of clothes already, but the doe-taur giggled and reached for his belt.

Without even thinking about it, Alyssa was habitually leaning down to help him out, thinking that he wanted a little bit of morning fun. And, under normal circumstances, that might have been exactly what Sandor would have liked too, her fingers running over the softness of his shaft and balls tucked away inside there.

"Ah, no, Alyssa," he said, stopping her briefly with a flick of his tail. "I was only teasing. I have...somewhere to take you today, yes! And we have to get going soon if we are to get there at all!"

Even his voice sounded different, even to him, the order in which he placed his words, ever so slightly too formal for him. He hoped desperately that Alyssa did not notice, but the doe-taur seemed to go along with it, after giving him a strange look. It was unusual, after him, to not follow through on his teasing.

"Of course, dear."

He just couldn't have her touching him there, not yet. Not after what he had seen, what he had done, too many images crowding in on his mind, doing their very best to flash before his eyes. He hoped that he would never have to explain that to her, though he was not ruling it out, not anymore.

Still, they headed out, as he pulled out the guide to the city that he had brought along with them, trying to find a suitable location for a nice day trip. They could get food along the way for Alyssa, for Sandor doubted that he would be hungry at all by then.

Outside the inn, someone bustled, stirring up a commotion, dust scuffed up around the heels of another anthro.

"Hello? Excuse me, excuse me..."

Alyssa cocked her head at the black panther, a female, unlike the waiter that she had seen hovering around the night before, tugging at the sleeves of people passing by, trying to get their attention. She looked oddly familiar.

"Excuse me, excuse me," she said, trying to get the attention of others. "Has anyone seen... Oh!"

She rushed to them, Sandor half-pausing mid-step, the feline taking advantage of someone that seemed more willing to listen to her.

"Ah! Have you seen my husband?" She asked, wringing her hands out before Sandor and Alyssa. "He's a waiter, taller than me, no white marks, no, not at all, on his body. He didn't come home last night, but the innkeeper says he left work on time. Are you staying here? Did you see him?"

"No, I haven't seen him."

Alyssa squeaked as Sandor tugged her away by the elbow, gentle but insistent, as if he did not want to grip her too tightly, though the doe-taur could not imagine why.

"Sandor! Why are we going so quickly? She's just looking for her husband!"

"But we haven't seen him, Alyssa," Sandor said gently, kissing the top of her head, her curly hair brushing his lips. "I'm sorry, there were... There were just so many people around last night, I just feel...more protective of you. I'm sorry I left you and you had to run away, I just want to keep you close."

Of course, the fox's real reason was darker than that, though Alyssa was not to know. For some of the remains of the panther were still sitting heavily in his stomach, his guts gurgling, working their way through his digestive tract.

Regardless of the ancient being, or what the future held for him, he was going to enjoy his time with her. He was going to enjoy every hour, every minute and every second with Alyssa, the doe-taur who had changed so much of his life and deserved to be treated like a queen.

For the time being, he was going to make the most of it. He was going to forget the events of the night before, but let that be a warning to him as to what would happen if he did not keep close track of his pills, managing his ailment.

And then, he would pursue a cure.

*

Years later...

_ _

_ _

Alyssa looked down at the white fox before her legs, his expression contorted in pain. Her hands moved over him, applying a healing salve, though there was more to the concoction than that.

_ _

Over the years, her skills in healing had grown. And she would only remember the vacation to Herring Archipelago that she had taken with Sandor to be a pleasure, a break and a reconnection that the two of them had very sorely needed.

_ _

The white fox moaned in pain and she tugged her mind back to the moment, not allowing it to wander. His hand rested on the chest of her deer half and she murmured to him softly, leaning into the familiar sensation, soothing him.

_ _

"It's okay, everything's okay..."

_ _

She bit her lip, hands doing their best work.

_ _

"May I call you Sandor, just once, please?"

_ _

He looked up at her, opening his eyes once more to reveal the sharp, captivating blue of them. He couldn't pull any words to his lips, but he was still able to give her a cheeky smile, lips a little wobbly, and then a thumbs-up.

_ _

She smiled faintly.

"Sandor..."

_ _

Yet it was not enough to drown out the light, tapping beats of hooves on ground that was a little harder-packed than usual, getting closer and closer and closer.

The fox's ears flicked.

"Al..."

_ _

The fox turned his head, the hoofbeats stopping.

_ _

They had come.