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Therian Dreaming II - New Beginnings

Chapter Two

© Cederwyn Whitefurr

5th September, 2021

All Rights Reserved.

It had been two days since Kelsie had given birth to her fawn. Kelsie was sick, weak and exhausted after the traumatic birth and the fawn, whilst small, seemed in relatively good health – not that Pete could truly tell one way or the other...

Late one night, Kelsie's heart breaking sobbing woke him and he sat up, then reached over and placed his hand on Kelsie's trembling shoulder. She flinched and he frowned, then rolled over and pressed himself up against her, feeling her cold fur against his warm body.

“Kelsie, you're freezing – what's wrong my love?"

Kelsie sniffled and remained silent, squeezing her eyes closed. Pete sat up, then folded his legs under him so he could kneel on the bed, as he looked at their beautiful fawn who nursed from Kelsie. Each time the fawn suckled, Kelsie winced and trembled again.

“Hey, easy love..." Pete murmured, as he stroked Kelsie's neck.

“It..." Kelsie whimpered. “It...it hurts so much! She wants to feed so often and I just...I can't..."

Kelsie struggled for the words.

“What do you mean, what hurts?" Pete asked, coming fully awake. “Kelsie, do you trust me my love?"

Kelsie shuddered as the fawn bunted heavily against her small udder, then she nodded. Carefully, Pete slid a hand down her flank, giving the fawn a gentle caress on the head before he placed his fingers against Kelsie's udder. It was hot and when he delicately caressed a leathery teat and squeezed ever so carefully, Kelsie whimpered and a hind leg kicked out.

“Woah, easy sweety... I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you!"

“What's wrong with me?" Kelsie wept, then she squealed as the fawn bunted her again, then she shoved roughly backwards and nearly pushed Pete off the bed as she stumbled and leapt off, then stood quivering and panting.

“Kelsie, honey..." Pete began, then the fawn started crying.

“I can't feed her!" Kelsie screamed, then fled the bedroom, a thunder of cloven hoof beats followed, then the crash of the screen door slamming against the wall.

Pete cradled the crying fawn close against his chest, as he slipped off the bed and followed Kelsie. He gently placed a finger against the fawns lips, feeling her eagerly begin suckling it as she quietened and her eyes quickly closed.

He found Kelsie outside, legs splayed out and panting heavily. Carefully, so as not to wake the lightly sleeping fawn, he sat on a old chair and looked at Kelsie.

“Kelsie, please...what's wrong?"

Kelsie fought her fear and reluctance, before she looked back over her shoulder and looked at her master and lover, before she sniffled and trembled, obedience overcoming her reluctance, she walked over and laid her head on his lap and looked up at him from the tops of her eyes, her ears flat.

“I don't know - “ Kelsie admitted. “I just...I can't feed our fawn! It hurts so much and I..."

Stroking her head gently, Pete pondered thoughtfully, before he spoke.

“Are you producing enough milk for her?"

Kelsie blinked.

“I... I don't know, I've never fawned before and...you raised me, what did you feed me as a fawn?"

“I had to use special milk formula for you, but Kelsie, nursing a fawn is a natural thing for a doe. I understand that you're scared sweety, truly I do – I'm scared too, you're not eating enough for yourself, let alone our beloved fawn! I can only imagine, how much it must take it out of a doe, bringing up just one fawn, let alone two..."

“What kind of mother am I, if I starve our newborn?" Kelsie wailed, then twisted away as hot tears sprang from her eyes. “You hate me!"

Pete felt the fawn stir, then at the sound of Kelsie crying, it began to cry as well.

“Hey!" Pete murmured, trying to keep his voice calm and patient.

“Admit it!" Kelsie snarled as she turned on him. “You'd sooner see me dead and you'd raise our fawn, just like how you raised..."

“Kelsie...I..."

“Leave me alone!" Kelsie wailed, as she twisted about and fled.

Pete cradled the crying fawn against his chest, holding her tight, as his own tears dripped down his cheeks and onto her.

*

“He hates me!" Kelsie wept, as she dropped to her knees and curled up under a tree, sobbing heart-brokenly. “What did I do? Why does he..."

Kelsie's ears heard the snap of a twig and she froze in fright, before her nose smelt Pete's scent coming closer.

“Go away!" Kelsie shrieked at him.

“No, I...Kelsie, please – I owe you an apology..." Pete sniffled, as he stopped a dozen paces away. “I – I don't hate you, or wish you would die – I love you, truly I do..."

“You hate me!" Kelsie screamed again. “Ever since I bit you...you've hated me for what and who I am...I'm a monster, a...a freak...I murdered them Pete, do you hear me? I tore their throats out and..."

His resolve breaking, Pete ran to Kelsie then pulled her head hard against his chest as he held her as she struggled and tried to break free, but he held her tight until her anger broke into choking sobs and her tears flowed.

“No, never Kelsie... I'd never hate you for who and what you...we...are... I think I'm starting to understand..."

“I'm...sorry - “ Come Kelsie's blubbering sniffles.

“No, Kelsie, you don't need to apologise, it isn't your fault! I think I understand, as I said, what might be wrong with you. Because you're not eating properly, your body is trying to do too much. Our fawn needs her mother, I need you Kelsie – you are my life, my love and my heart belongs to you. I will go to town tomorrow, I will get some milk formula for her, but promise me – please..."

Kelsie looked up, her body trembling and eyes filled with tears.

“Promise me, you will not do anything silly. I fear you may be suffering some sort of...postnatal depression brought on by the stress and your inexperience – it isn't uncommon Kelsie. Please, come on my beloved, dry those eyes, please?"

“We..." Kelsie sniffled.

Gently, Pete lifted her head up and smoothed down her ears.

“We...since before our fawn was born...we haven't..."

Kelsie squeezed her eyes closed.

“We haven't...oh..." Pete blushed, then stroked Kelsie's head again. “I explained that to you love...I was scared of hurting you and your unborn fawn if we made love, no matter how gentle we were."

Kelsie sniffled and trembled, then looked up at him.

“Is that the truth master? Or are you lying to me?"

“No, dear, sweet Kelsie, I'd never lie to you, I swear it! I love, adore and cherish you, you are my everything to me, as I pray, I am to you, now, come on, please? Dry your tears my love, come home? It's cold out here, and you're already so malnourished, I do not want you to get sick."

Kelsie sniffled and slowly rose to her hooves, then followed him home, her head hung low and ears flattened.

Pete hated himself and it left him feeling sick and sorrowful. Kelsie was more fawn than adult – he knew that, whether it was her upbringing or something else, he didn't understand...

*

Kelsie slept alone in her own room, her sobs and sniffles making his heart ache, Pete slept with their fawn, his arms holding her against his chest as she stirred and whimpered quietly.

“Shhh little one, I know your hungry, I promise, I'll go to town tomorrow and get you some milk, a bottle and a teat. I just pray you'll drink it – it took ages for your mother to accept it, but she can not produce enough milk on her own and..."

Opening her eyes, the fawn looked up at her father, then bleated softly. Pete sniffled and gently placed a finger against her lips and she began to suckle on his finger, her eyes slowly closing again as she drifted back into a light sleep.

“Sleep little one, please?" Pete murmured, as he stroked her head gently.

Soothed by the suckling on his finger, and her fathers gentle heartbeat, the fawn slipped deeper into sleep, continuing to suckle his finger instinctively.

Pete knew sleep wouldn't come for him this night, as he still heard Kelsie's sobs and it broke his heart to hear her like that...

To Be Continued...