How I got Damned - Ushis Tale part two
#6 of How I Got Damned
Fifth Chapter to How I got Damned
We again meet Ushi, protector and mother to all the denizens of the Harem, as she helps giving birth to a new inhabitant of hell.
We learn how she is not at all pleased with the Demon who runs this part of hell.
And we learn how she got down hear in the first place.
This Story contains:
Depictions of:
Birth
Violence
Strong Language
Sex M/F
Torment
Blood, Guts
Death, Murder
Loss, Grieve
Magic, Transformation, Transmutation
Story and Idea White Dragon
Written by El Poyo Diabolo
Characters: Sarabi by Disney, all others by Fire15q
How I got damned
Ushis Tale part two
Birth Pains
"Uuuuaaaaarrrrggghhh!"
The roar resounded through Adramalech's Harem. A moment of silence followed. Then another roar.
"Aaaaaarrrggghhh!"
The roar, tinged with pain, anger, and impatience, echoed far across the plains of Hell. A single demon sat on one of the great onyx pillars, looking down into the harem. He was clad in blue feathers and possessed innumerable wings. Full of impatience, he stared at the great hall where most of the lionesses used to sleep.
"Nyaaaaargh!"
Sounded the roar again, making the foundations of hell tremble. The grin on the demon's face widened. He knew that every time Adramalech begat another offspring, his army would grow. An army that already included countless warriors. Right now the Harem was about to bring another warrior to hell for his armies.
"Hhaaa.... Aaaarrrrrrghhh!"
All the lionesses were gathered in the great hall. Adramalech was also there. He did not miss any of the births. If it was somehow feasible, he was present when one of his lionesses gave birth.
It was Liliana's fourth pregnancy. The lioness, who was so different from her fellow lions, lay hunched over on a bedsite, screaming her anger and pain to hell.
"Hhhhaaaaaaarghh..."
Her fur was wet with sweat and completely sticky. She breathed heavily and in short gasps. Between contractions, she found just enough time to complain about how she didn't even like male lions and why Adramalech kept impregnating her.
"Damn it Adramalech, each and every time... Oh shit, not again... Aaaaaaarrghhh...!"
Her fangs flashed in the semi-darkness of the hall as she screamed.
"... ha... ha... ha... you know very well that my births are harder than those of the others... why are you doing this to me......AAAAAAAAAnnrgggghh!"
Adramalech came closer and tried to snuggle up, only to get a clawed slap from her.
"... Don't come at me like that. You know I can't have that!"
She screamed, preparing herself for the next contraction. Ushi sat at the other end of the bedsite, watching Liana's abdomen.
"You know why he's doing it. Because you fucking love it."
Said Ushi calmly, continuing to watch the abdomen of the lioness with the number 111. The little demon struggling through the birth canal of the lioness was moving frantically. Its kicks and punches were clearly visible.
"That's not... truuuaaaaaarrrrrggghghhhh!"
Screamed Liana from whose head sweat was running and her claws were digging into the skins she was lying on.
"Oh yes it is. You love being pregnant. The feeling of carrying a new life inside you, bearing his fruit, doing your part for the Harem."
Ushi's words sounded loving and honest, but Liana shook her head.
"Don't extrapolate from yourself to others... Oh shit how long is this going to take... Raaaaaaargh!"
Again the lioness writhed and her massive muscles continued to push the demon through her birth canal. Liana was shaking all over. The effort had to be immense. Ushi bent down to look between the lioness' legs at her vagina. At that moment her water finally broke and Ushi got the full load in her face. With a forced serene expression on her face, she raised her head again and shook off the amniotic fluid.
"I'll just ignore the fact that you did this on purpose, but I can reassure you, it won't be long now."
Adramalech, meanwhile, was prowling around Liana and Ushi the whole time. He hated not being able to help. Some of his lionesses appreciated it when he snuggled up, offering soul support when he already couldn't physically help. But Liana was different. He knew that. She was polarized differently. She just didn't like male lions. He respected that. Still, he mated with her from time to time. It wasn't that she didn't like the act of mating, she just didn't like male lions. And he knew that his mother was right about Liana liking to be pregnant. It did something to her body. She was always very happy as long as she was pregnant. Of course, giving birth was one of those things. Unlike the other lionesses who brought demonic lion children to hell, she brought effective demons into this world. They were already significantly larger at birth and each time it took hours for her to squeeze them out of her. Fortunately, she had not yet had twins.
Liana rolled over onto her stomach, ramming her feet into the skins and howling her desperation to hell while bending to apply more pressure.
"Nyaaaaaaaaaarghhh..."
Her eyes stepped forward her fingers dug into the skins with a ripping sound. She could feel the demon sliding on, but it wasn't out... yet. Ushi realized the problem. The demon was too big to cross the pelvic passage. A big problem.
"Lie on your back!"
She commanded. Liana looked to Ushi with bloodshot eyes her teeth bared to the extreme.
"Don't order me how to give birth to this thing...Haaaaaaaarg...!"
Again she writhed and her abdominal muscles contracted in waves. Her legs trembled and she choked out blood.
"You're going to kill yourself... The demon can't go any further, you're too tight. Lie down on your back. Let me help you!"
Ushi's voice was insistent. She did not have to shout. She had the rare gift of being able to raise the volume of her voice almost at will without having to shout. A gift that probably only true mothers had mastered. Her statement did not allow for any contradiction. But even if Liana had wanted to contradict, she lacked the strength. She fell sideways onto the bed and turned onto her back in agony. She could just see the One on Uhsi's chest begin to glow as the next contraction took her breath away. She was no longer able to scream. The pain was overwhelming. Her body reared up against the demon stuck in her pelvis, unable to move forward or back. Liana's breathing was in shallow, short gasps; she was in danger of losing consciousness.
Adramalech watched in horror as his mother's form changed. She grew and her limbs changed. From her paws formed claws that looked similar to those of demons. She took a step toward Liana.
"Hold her tight, she must not move now. Adramalech, Sarada, spread her legs and pull apart, the pelvis must stretch. Quickly!"
Without hesitation, some lionesses came to the rescue and Adramalech and Sarada each grabbed a leg and started pulling them apart. Liana wanted to resist, but her body no longer obeyed her. She could only feel the next contraction coming and rolled her eyes, gasping.
Ushi waited for the moment and pressed with her fist on the lower abdomen of the lioness, supporting the abdominal muscles in their task to press the demon through the too narrow birth canal. At the same time, she penetrated Liana with her second hand and tried to grasp the wriggling Demon. She managed to get a hold of one limb of the little creep, but could not pull it out yet.
"One more time. We don't have much time left. It has to work next time."
Said Ushi in her eerily calm manner. It wasn't that she wasn't excited too. She was tense to the tips of her hair. But she knew one had to keep a cool head if they wanted this to somehow end successfully. She could see Liana weakening. It was true, Liana could not die. She was just as much a demon as the other lionesses and the little creep who so vigorously refused to leave her vulva. But if she were to "die" now, she would wake up in a pregnant state, and the game would start all over again.
No, it had to end now. Now and here and successfully.
"Now. Pull!"
Ushi commanded when she saw the next contraction. Liana was already not responding any longer. Adramalech and Sarada pulled, the pelvis stretched, and Ushi equally pushed and pulled the demon through the narrow passage. Ushi could feel the dam of the lioness tearing to give more space to the much too large object in Liana's vagina.
With a squelching sound, the demon appeared and pulled its umbilical cord behind it. Ushi did not hesitate but tore the umbilical cord in two with her teeth and threw the demon carelessly behind her. He would leave quite quickly, as they always did. With these offspring there was no rearing in the real sense. They were not suckled, they came to hell in full possession of their mental and physical abilities. They only had to grow. And they didn't need the lionesses for that.
Ushi bent to Liana, who rested unconscious on the bed. She searched for a pulse, a respiration, a sign of life. The lioness lay utterly motionless. Adramalech and Sarada had let go of her legs and the lion had come to Liana's head and nudged her tenderly. Adramalech's expression darkened and he was already looking around for the little demon who was responsible for this misery. He would very slowly and gleefully dismember him into his individual parts.
Then Liana drew the air sharply into her lungs. Her eyes were wide open and the wheezing and subsequent coughing sounded eerie. When the first coughing fits were over, Liana lay flat on the bed again. Her breathing was heavy and rattling. No one saw how Ushi's One slowly stopped glowing as she took her hand from Liana's chest.
"Shit... never again will I participate in this shit..."
She cursed. Everything just fucking hurt in her. There was nothing about her or inside her that wasn't screaming in pain right now. Adramalech virtually stormed to her. He cautiously snuggled up to her, ignoring her clamor and cursing. He also let her half-hearted attempts to defend himself pass. It took a moment before Liana finally gave up and let him have his way. She actually enjoyed the affection. She knew Adramalech would never force her to do anything she didn't want. He was different from the lions she had known before her damnation, who had considered it their right to rape her just because she was a lioness. Adramalech had always been true to his word. He had only mated with her when she wanted him to, and she had enjoyed it every time, just as she enjoyed the caresses he was currently showering her with. She relaxed, closed her eyes, and gave herself to him.
Ushi, whose reverse transformation was complete, took a deep breath and looked around. The whole Harem was present, as was usual in most births. It was a nice feeling to see so much unity. They were now over 120 lionesses. An unbelievable number. No other male lion could have even remotely built such a large pride. She smiled and began shooing the other lionesses outside.
"Come now, there is nothing more to see here. Leave them alone for a while. Yes you too Zoey, I see you you little voyeur. Get out!"
Like little children, the lionesses giggled and cackled as their clan mother shooed them out of the hall.
"And someone catch me that little demon, I have a chicken that needs some plucking."
Ushi called after them as she looked up and saw the blue feathered demon.
The hall, on the other hand, grew quiet. Adramalech snuggled up to Liana, gently pulling her towards him and holding her close. She let him and snuggled up to him as well. She enjoyed his warmth. Only when she wanted to take his paw and wrap it more tightly around her, she noticed that he was no longer in his primal lion form. He had adapted to hers and his front legs had taken on the shape of arms and his paws were now more like clawed hands. She smiled and pulled his arm to her chest and placed it there.
"I will not mate with you again to impregnate you if it ends in such disaster every time. I don't want you to suffer."
Whispered Adramalech into her neck. Her hand moved back and rested on his flank.
"It's all right. It's not your fault. I want you to get me pregnant. I love the feeling of something growing inside me. If two days of suffering is the price I pay for being able to spend months of pleasure, I'll pay that price."
Said Liana. Adramalech nodded and pulled her closer to him. He would talk to the wind, perhaps they would find a solution to this dilemma.
He could not know that someone had already beaten him to it.
The Wind was still sitting on the pillar when Ushi came to him with the wriggling demon in her mouth. He already knew she was coming and he knew why. It would also do no good to delay this confrontation. That would only mean having to have the same discussion with both lions at the same time.
"Hello Ushi. Is that a souvenir for me?"
Asked the Wind even before Ushi could say anything. She was seething with anger. She literally spat the little demon at his feet.
"You can hold that as you wish. We need to talk about this!"
The big demon turned to her and practically took the little demon by the scruff and held it in front of his face. Sullenly, he surveyed the little creep and finally tossed it carelessly off the pillar.
"What do you want to talk about it? It's a little class 2 demon. Seems to be alive and well, congratulations to the mother."
His tone was bored. He knew the mother was well, he knew this birth had been difficult. Ushi literally exploded.
"You know exactly what we're talking about here. Don't act dumber than you are!"
The lioness hissed, her One already beginning to glow again. The wind looked at her for a moment and finally sighed.
"I repeat myself. What do you want? We are here in hell damned. Never have these words been more true than now. It's just part of it that childbirth is painful, and since we're in hell, the pain is that much worse."
His voice sounded slightly annoyed and he was not aware of any guilt. Ushi, on the other hand, was one hundred percent sure that the Wind definitely had its fingers in the pie and could definitely bring about a change. She pointed her paw at him and shouted.
"You know what I want. You brag about knowing everything. And you brag about being all-powerful. See that Liana doesn't suffer like this in her births anymore!"
Her roar made the pillars tremble and the Wind laughed in amusement.
"I see you are getting better at your role as protector of the Harem. I'm impressed. Not only are you protecting your little family from the rest of hell, now you want to change the conditions under which they live here. Pay attention little lioness. You already have the super special rate here. Normally you'd feel the full brunt of hell, but since I have a deal with Adramalech to abide by, you're still doing pretty well down here. The lower demons don't bother you and the atmosphere in your little garden is tolerable. That's more than anyone else down here can claim. So don't get rebellious here."
The one on her chest literally sparked, as she took another step towards him she transformed into her fighting form. All Wind did was roll his eyes.
"Have you learned nothing from your son's teachings?"
He asked, snapping his fingers. Ushi's form collapsed and the lioness lay before him in her original form.
"You can't threaten me. You cannot defeat me. I am the source of your power. I can take it away from you at any time, remember?"
He rose and towered before the lioness. Ushi bared her teeth, but the Wind was completely unconcerned.
"I am the alpha and the omega here. Everything that happens here happens because I want it to. No one is forcing me to do anything here...THIS IS MY DOMINION!"
At the last words, all hell shook and some of the onyx pillars in the distance collapsed. Ushi was not fazed.
"I am not stupid. I know you can't destroy me. You are bound by your word. You demons have rules, too. I've been down here long enough. I know some of those rules."
Gasped the lioness as she braced herself against the great demon's strength and slowly got back to her feet. Her legs shook, but she remained standing.
"You demons are quite a pathetic bunch. You are victims of your own rules. You can't break a promise once you've made it. That is why you cannot destroy neither me nor my son. My protégés are also under this protection. When you gave my son his power, you promised him. You can never break this oath again..."
Something like a smile painted itself on Ushi's strained face when she saw the grimace on the Wind's face.
"Yeah guess what, you're not the only great demon here. I met your brothers when you were out and about again somewhere who-knows-where. A very nice family you have there. Especially your oldest brother. You don't seem to have much in common. He told me a lot of things."
Ushi managed to lift her head far enough to face the Wind.
"One thing in particular was very interesting. It had something to do with the power of names."
She could see the demon's eyes widen, just for a moment, but it was enough for her.
"Yes knowing the real name of a demon helps to exert power over it, but it only helps with minor low level demons."
Explained the Wind in a casual manner. But Ushi was not deterred.
"He had mentioned that you would say that, so he proved it to me on your little brother. And after that, he told me your name. Your real name."
She took another step toward the demon. There was something murderous in her smile. The Wind took a step back for the first time. Ushi stopped and nodded.
"That's all I wanted to know. You're going to see to it that Lianna's births go better from now on. I don't expect it to be painless. But if something like today happens again, we'll test out what you can do with a name like that."
Said Ushi and turned to leave. The Wind reached out to her, but the look Ushi threw over her shoulder made him rethink his plan.
...
Beginnings and endings
She stood again in front of the cave of her childhood. It was a beautiful day. The sun was high in the sky, the warmth was pleasant, the fresh breeze blowing up from the water hole brought with it the smells of the savannah. Everything here was so familiar to her. She knew every bush, every rock and every hidden corner where someone could be waylaid. Tears came to her eyes again. In a moment, her mother would come out of the cave. As she had done countless times before. She would call for her and she would answer. Like every time. And like every time, her mother would not hear her, even though she was standing right in front of her.
She knew exactly where she had been at that moment. She was with the others in the corridors of an old warthog den, playing hide and seek. They were unaware of the danger they were in. How could they. They were children. They were having fun. That was what childhood was for, after all. Fun. Fun and adventure. They had found the den a few days ago. The occupant had been gone for some time, his smells had faded, and the burrow seemed completely empty. None of them knew that dry constructions, which were lifted from the loose earth of the savannah, were always in danger of collapsing. For them, the corridors were just a welcome opportunity to get out of the sun and still romp around. And so they scuffled in the chambers under the ground, playing chase and hide-and-seek. Their shrieks and laughter echoed through the burrow. None of them heard the calls of their mother.
Ushi knew that, she had been there at first hand. Even today she was still reproaching herself. If only they had heard the calls of their mother at that time.
Her mother stood above on the rock and called for her children. She saw the elephants trotting leisurely to the waterhole. They trumpeted when they heard the lioness' calls, but paid no further attention.
Ushi was down with the elephants, screaming her head off, but none of her calls were heard. Only a few more steps separated the elephants from disaster. Deep down, Ushi knew she was powerless. She had seen this happen countless times.
Had to see the elephant break through the ceiling of the great chamber and fall. It almost buried the entire den under its massive body. It would take several hours for Ushi and another lion cub to dig themselves out of the ruins. For the others, any help came too late.
She had had to listen countless times to the desperate cries of the two lion cubs, desperately calling for the others while they dug their paws bloody, before the adult lions also came to the rescue. Only further agonizing hours later the remaining bodies were recovered.
She heard the desperate pleas of mothers begging for the lives of their children. Today she knew that the great spirits did not bother with such trifles.
She went to the cave and saw her father shouting at her. She could remember exactly every word. Every humiliation, shouted out in anger and regretted immediately afterwards. Of every curse, imposed in grief and lifted again in shame.
She had stood before the other lion cub then and taken the punishment upon herself. Her younger self had wept bitterly and grieved for days. Her mother was the only one who had taken care of her, knowing that she was not directly to blame for what had happened. It was only thanks to her being so insistent that she ate that she was still alive today...well, if you could call it living.
She got ready for the time jump. She knew her dreams well enough by now to know when the fades came. It was a strange feeling every time. She had accepted over time that she could not escape from these dreams. It seemed that this was part of the punishment for her damnation. She relived this dream almost every night. Stations of her life. Whenever something happened that she had no control over, something that had left a lasting mark on her life.
She knew very well, after this tragedy with the warthog burrow, she had always been near the offspring, had always had an eye on the offspring. Had neglected other duties if necessary. Had taken punishments and beatings, because she wanted to be sure that such a thing could never happen again.
Tears ran down her cheeks as the transition happened. It felt like she was just being moved to the right, to another theater stage.
She knew where she was, when she was. Her first mating. God, how awful that had been. Her own father, old and gray, barely able to lead his pride, had taken it into his head to impregnate every single lioness once again. They had all been sure half of those matings would never come to anything, and bets were on whether he would die of a heart attack before that happened.
It had been humiliating to feel that old sack lying on top of her, his powerless thrusts along with his tortured moans. She had had to bear it. He had been the chief.
Again she screamed at herself to throw him off, to just kill him. She would have endured the punishment for that, too. Especially since the old man succumbed to the next descendant shortly thereafter. When she saw him she had to swallow. The young lion standing over the defeated one was Adramalech's father, her partner for many years. A proud lion. He had been tall, strong and good-natured. A patriach like he stood in the book.
Her dream showed her the various stations she passed on her way to the top of the pride.
Her first mating with Adramalech's father. A glorious night. So completely the opposite of her mating with the old lion. He had been forceful, relegated her to her barrier, beaten her in single combat, mounted her, marked her as his own. Absentmindedly she ran her paw over the scars on her right shoulder and again tears ran down her face. The mating had been a revelation. She had never felt so alive as she did that night as they surrendered to their lust together. Out of that mating had come her first children of her own. Daughters. Fit as a fiddle and healthy.
The dream showed her more matings, more offspring. She saw the death of her mother, which hit her hard then and now. And she saw the night she took the top of the pride alongside Adramalech's father. A position she had fought hard for. Great hunting successes, abundant prey, and skills that made the patriarch prefer her to the others had contributed to this.
It was just before that night.
On a cold new moon night, they had finally conceived Adramalech. The lion that would change their lives so significantly. Would finally end it. She took a deep breath.
How she would love to spend another night with Adramalech's father.
She could see herself. Her old self, her true self. How she sat with Adramalech's father on the top of the rock and looked into the plain. It was quiet that night. The balmy breeze that carried the scents of the savanna to them made her shiver. She had leaned on the larger lion, looking for support, and he had given it to her. He had leaned his head against hers and rasped sweet wood incessantly.
Ushi had to smile, yes, he had been very good at that. He had always had a talent for finding the right words when it came to wrapping one of the lionesses around his finger. She sat just a few feet away from the two of them. Her heart was breaking.
Her former self stood up and snuggled up to him, almost pushing him over. He allowed her to do so and lay down. Let her dominate him for a moment before he gently pulled her to the floor in one fluid motion and stood over her. It was a game they always played. A dance to see who could finally dominate the other. It was clear that in the end he always won, but the way to get there showed the respect he had for her.
He stood over her and grinned and she lay on the ground. In her lust, she stretched her rear end toward him and arched her tail out of the way. He needed no further invitation. With a triumphant roar, he mounted her and penetrated her. Ushi could remember exactly that feeling. She felt him inside her. His devotion and his power flowed through her. Her whole body trembled as she saw herself with him. She could remember each of his powerful thrusts, how he penetrated her deeply each time and whispered more compliments in her ear with each little climax he gave her.
She knew it was just an illusion, a wearing image to torture her. To show her what was unattainable for her. She felt her desire, her lust for more. She could feel him moving inside her. The tingling that was building inside her, announcing the coming climax. She couldn't help but touch herself, competing with her younger self to see who came first. It was the same every night. She hated herself for not being able to resist it, especially since she knew it was unattainable.
She felt his bite on her neck, pulling her head up and pumping his last powerful thrusts into her only to cum in unison with him. But like every time she saw them climax in their intimate union, her climax remained empty and unsatisfying.
This was the night that - in retrospect - would change everything - her whole life basically revolved around this one night. The night in which they conceived Adramalech.
The next pictures showed her during her pregnancy. She had been happy. Like every time and her patriach was proud of her. Another offspring for the pride. Already they were a large and well-functioning pride. Their territory included a fertile patch of savanna and the abundant food supply made itself felt in a diversity of species that allowed them to maintain a large pride.
Ushi steeled herself for the next scene. She knew exactly what was coming. She felt the pain even before the scene change came. She took a deep breath. This pain was nothing compared to what she knew by now, but still it came so abruptly every night that it almost took her breath away.
She sat at the cave entrance and looked into the center of the cave. There she lay with bloated belly and panted. Her mate and patriarch crouched beside her, trying to stand by her, while the rest of the pride stood around her, waiting. How she would love to go to them. How she would love to put her paw on her own shoulder and encourage her. That she would make it, that this was all just a small test on her way to something greater. That the pain would pass and the joy would come afterwards.
But she could not. She had been banished to the place of the silent observer. Forced to watch what was happening, unable to influence it.
Silently she spoke to herself. Repeated the words of that time. How she had screamed. Her rage and her pain had echoed in the cave.
Another contraction, another hoarse cry. She saw her writhing. Her belly contracted, trying to push the fruit of her womb into the world. She relaxed again, panting between contractions, looking to her partner who whispered encouragement, assuring her again and again how much he loved her and that he believed in her. She met the next contraction with bared teeth, gasping her effort through clenched teeth. Her claws clenched and she writhed again to help her abdominal muscles work. The undulating contracture was well in evidence.
Ushi knew the birth of her son had been a birth like any other, without problems, like all her births. She was one of the lucky ones who rarely had complications during pregnancy or during childbirth, but that didn't mean it was any less stressful or painful. She looked down at herself as she lay there, in the sweat of her brow, teeth bared. Fighting for the life of her offspring. She saw her mate licking the sweat from her forehead. She saw how she spread her hind legs. She knew two more contractions were coming, then it would be done and her nemesis would be born.
When the next contraction came, she felt with her younger self. She grabbed her belly and gasped while her younger self screamed and reared up. The sight was bizarre every time. She could see Adramalech moving under her skin toward her vagina and finally seeming to disappear briefly. And then came the final contraction. Once again she reared back, screaming with all her might. Her muscles contracted, it was as if only half of her belly was still there, while she writhed. Her hind legs trembled and when he finally appeared, the feeling of relief was palpable.
Behind her lay a bloodied little creature wrapped in slime, lying there powerless but breathing. Her younger self wasted no time but immediately dragged herself to him and began fervently to clean the little progenitor. Immediately she knew that this baby was something special. Her first and only son. As she bit through the umbilical cord and devoured the afterbirth, as nature intended, she knew he would one day take over this pride.
Ushi shook her head. How wrong she had been then. How many mistakes she had made.
She saw how her partner came to her, how proud he was of her, even if it was not a girl she had given birth to. He had been aware at the time that the little lion who had just found his way into his life would challenge him one day, and when the time came, and he was defeated, he would make his place free. As the course of events would have it. As the cycle of life would have it. It was all right.
How wrong they all were. Ushi screamed at himself. Screamed into the round that she should have brought up her son more strictly. Should have taught him moderation and humility. But her false pride and hubris of having given birth to the next patriarch made her reckless. Led to the fact that her son had sought the confrontation much too early and much too unprepared. She hated herself for it, for the fact that she carried the guilt for what had become of her son.
She knew what was coming now, and she wanted to close her eyes to it, but the dream wouldn't let her. She saw her son's childhood and growing up in fast forward. She saw how she raised him to be self-confident, to assert his will and his place in the pride. Her son grew up quickly, seeking confrontation with his peers and quickly gaining the upper hand. It wasn't long before he was at the forefront of those growing up. Whatever happened, happened because he wanted it to. He was a born leader and he knew it. His mother knew that too and she was proud of him. Ushi was also proud of Adramalech, but she was also heartbroken that he had never learned to temper himself, never learned to be patient and wait humbly for his chance. Even his father was proud of him and showed him so.
It was this impatience that led Adramalech to claim his rightful place far too early. His father was not yet ready to pass on his pride to him. He had not yet learned everything that a worthy patriarch had to learn. Just this patience, this humility, which made a good leader a great patriarch. He was yet to learn this lesson. But Adramalech did not have this patience and saw in it only the excuse of an old lion who wanted to stay in power a few days longer.
Ushi was there that evening, she had had to witness how her son did the unspeakable and received the just punishment for his offense. In tears, she had witnessed how her mate not only defeated her son in single combat, but downright destroyed him. For her sake, her mate, Adramalech's father, had shown mercy before justice and had not killed him, but only banished him. So that he might learn his lesson and find another pride somewhere that he could lead. She had been inconsolable then.
And also today she sat at the edge of the arena and watched her son getting the beating of his life. How his father finally stood over him bleeding and pronounced his punishment. How all her pleading and begging could not change his mind.
Tears streamed down her cheeks. Tears of anger and shame. She screamed at her former self. If she had wanted to help her son, she should have killed the old man, but she was too weak for that then, and she was too weak for that now. And so, again today, she just watched as Adramalech's father went back to the cave, as the old and new patriarch of the pride, and as her beloved son picked himself up with a groan, spat out, and set off on the long journey that would make him what he was today. She could see her former self walking with her mate. She knew that this had probably been the biggest mistake she had ever made. If she had stayed with her son, with Adramalech, maybe....
Her feeling of guilt threatened to overwhelm her as she watched her son disappear into the shadows of her memory. She knew that she, that is, her former self, would soon run after him. She had been given permission to say a proper goodbye to her son. To say farewell to him. After that she would come back and take her place in the pride again.
Ushi turned in the direction where the next scene would take place. She already knew her dream so well that she knew exactly when what would happen. She looked to the ground. She did not want to see this fateful encounter one more time, but somehow she forced herself to watch.
In front of her was the whirlwind of dust and sand where Adramalech stood talking to the wind, in front of the storm her younger self cowered and begged for her son's soul. There was nothing she could do. Today she knew that. At that time, she had still had hope to have an influence. Adramalech had spoken to her at a later time, he had not been able to hear her plea. The wind had clouded his perception. She watched helplessly when her son once again sold his soul to the great demon, when her younger self collapsed and when Adramalech made his offer to her for the first time. Today she knew that she could have spared herself a lot of suffering if she had just accepted his offer then and there. But she had not yet been ready at that very moment. Her dream figure sat next to herself and spoke courage to herself. In the mistaken hope that it would help her get through the next few days.
She saw herself running away, back to her pride, to warn them, to warn him. While her son stayed behind on the plain, just watching her gloomily. She went to her son's dream form, which was slowly fading.
"Don't do it..."
Her voice broke as she pleaded with him in vain. Even though she knew full well that it wouldn't change anything in the past, but she still had to try. Had to try to save the others.
"... I beg of you... don't do it."
Her son looked her straight in the eye as if he could see her, his grin was diabolical and then he just dissolved.
Ushi closed her eyes and waited for the scene to change. By this time the pain in her chest was almost unbearable, but she knew it would get worse. Every time.
She found herself back in the den of her pride. She saw herself rushing into the den, hunted down and out of breath. She saw herself throwing herself at the feet of her patriarch to tell him about her son, his pact with the wind, and his plan to kill them all. She had to watch the patriarch laughing at her, how could the lion he had subdued only a few hours ago now strut in here and take them all on? Ridiculous!
It broke her heart to see her former self being laughed at for trying to save all their lives. And worse, because she insisted on the truth of her warning, she was expelled from the community because she was only trying to give her son a second chance. They chased her away.
Again she screamed her anger and despair into the cave but no one heard her. She collapsed at the cave entrance. She knew that any help came too late. This was only a shadow, a memory of the events, but the pain remained the same. Being banished from her own family for trying to help her was about the worst. She buried her head under her paws. She didn't want to see or hear the rest of the dream. But she had no choice. She saw herself sitting at the water hole, staring into the murky water, unsure of what to do now. Ushi tried to pull herself together, to be strong for her younger self, but she could not. She lay in the dust of the savannah, watching herself startle up and look around for something behind her. Ushi closed her eyes and pressed her paws to her ears. Through clenched teeth, she persevered. She knew all too well what her younger self was seeing and hearing. She didn't want to witness it again. Not one more time.
Behind her, a drama was unfolding whose effects had only made her own damnation possible. Adramalech had made good on his threat. In a foretaste of his power, he had entered the cave and claimed his right to the pride.
Although he was now larger and clearly stronger, the entire pride had turned on him and attacked him together. Adramalech had left no one alive. Each of the lions had been disemboweled, dismembered, torn to shreds and violated. He had literally nailed his father to the wall of the cave. When her former self had reached the cave, Adramalech had already left. She had found only the remains of her family. Everyone was dead, even the cubs. She had suffered a mental breakdown then, from which she had never really recovered, and even now, hearing the piercing scream of her younger self, she was sure that she had still not gotten over that event. She still blamed herself for this incident. She would live with that guilt forever. Literally.
When she finally opened her eyes again, she saw a broken lioness in front of her. A lioness who looked just as devastated as she was, who had reached the end of her strength and the end of her road. She saw herself after days of wandering through the savanna, after days of neither eating nor drinking. Consumed by guilt and despair. Paws sore and eyes red from constant crying. She didn't know where to go at the time, the nearest pride was far away, and the chances of being taken in there were slim at best. Alone she was not able to survive. Lions were pack animals. Without their pride, they were not able to survive in the long term.
She would die alone. Die of thirst, most likely. She could always go to the water hole and drink, and to what end? Prolong the suffering? She headed for the ravine that bounded their territory. It was deep, the walls steep. It would be only a short jump. A small effort. A painless fall and a hard impact. A quick and sure death, as painless as it could be.
Ushi took a deep breath. She remembered that day well. How she had felt. That at that moment she had only seen this one way out. She walked beside her younger self, talking to herself for courage. This time she would make the leap. This time she would finish it, and then everything that happened after that was just a bad dream. A punishment for the mistakes she had made in her life. She wanted to believe so strongly. But deep inside she knew that also in this night, she would not find the courage to jump. That also in this night Adramalech would find her one more time. That he would comfort her and offer her a way out.
She saw herself peering over the edge of the ravine into the depths. She lay down on the edge and closed her eyes. Her legs trembled, not from weakness. She screamed her despair into the night. She cursed herself for her cowardice, for her weakness and indecision.
Ushi sat beside her and put an invisible, impalpable paw on her shoulder.
"You can do this. I believe in you."
She whispered in a tear-stained voice.
"Get up."
She demanded, but her other self didn't budge. Only her sobs could be heard after she stopped screaming.
"I found you..."
Both Ushi heads wheeled around. Not ten meters behind them stood Adramalech. His voice sounded soft and full of love.
"... I have come to give you another chance, Mother. Become my mate. Come with me."
His voice was so inviting. It was almost impossible to escape it. Even now, after all these years and countless matings, Ushi still felt that attraction emanating from him.
He slowly approached, in no hurry, completely relaxed.
"Come with me mother, leave this place. There is nothing left for you here. I am all that is left. Join me and become ruler of your own pride for all eternity."
She still knew exactly how she almost died of fear, but at the same time felt so attracted to him that resistance was completely futile. She was on the edge, one leg already over the edge, literally. She was unable to move, unable to get up and run away, or to jump.
"Let me become your mate. Give yourself to me, and you will live forever. All your worries will be forgotten."
He said and sat down about 5 meters in front of her. Ushi closed her eyes. She loved her son. More than anything, she loved him. But what happened that night had just been wrong.
In a moment she would get up, she would walk over to him, she would make sure that everything he said was true and then... then she would allow him to commit this betrayal of nature.
"I can't Adramalech, you're not you."
Ushi said her voice broken. Adramalech tilted his head and raised his eyebrows.
"But mother, I am me. I am your son. Your son, who loves you, who suffers when he sees you like this, who suffers when he knows he didn't do everything he could to save you."
He spoke softly and insistently. The charm in his voice worked like a spell and Ushi felt extremely drawn to him, but she struggled against it.
"How will you save me if you have to condemn me for it?"
The question was valid and Adramalech didn't really know the answer.
"I'm saving you from an eternity in a hell from which there is no escape. You will be with me, I will create a new family for you, a family that will endure throughout eternity."
He held out his paw to her. There was so much goodness so much love in his gaze, Ushi's resistance was crumbling by the moment.
"I had a family, you killed them."
She accused him, in a last attempt to fight him off. She stood up slowly, her legs shaking.
"Yes, I killed them, but only because they wouldn't accept me!"
He said calmly, but emphatically. He stood up as well, ready to jump should Ushi get any ideas. Ushi continued to fight with herself, but her body took command and went for him. Ushi knew that she had lost. She could no longer refuse him. Her body snuggled up against his. It was an incredibly good feeling. A feeling of security, of assurance. He was warm, soft, and yet steadfast.
"And you will never leave me? Will always be there for me?"
She asked in a trembling voice, while her body was already ready to surrender to him fully.
"Yes I will be with you forever, for all eternity. I will give you a new family, I will give you countless descendants. Together we will rule over hell."
Ushi shook her head at the last sentence. Today she knew that Adramalech did not rule over hell by any means, heck, he did not even rule over his Harem. Technically, the Wind ruled over him, and according to the Wind, she was more of a ruler over the Harem than Adramalech had ever been. She grinned to herself. Somehow his delusions of grandeur were actually cute sometimes.
Her former self, on the other hand, completely fell for him. She was ready to give herself to him, to sell her soul to the devil and become his concubine. Granted, the sex was fantastic, and never having to worry about wrinkles and gray hair again was a bonus not to be underestimated.
"Well, I will take your word for it Adramalech."
Said Ushi, getting herself prepared.
"And it won't hurt?"
Adramalech stood over his mother and nuzzled his head against hers.
"No, the Wind has assured me you won't feel a thing."
*How right he was.*
Thought Ushi. She really hadn't felt anything then.
The penetrated her powerfully. With a roar of triumph, he proclaimed his victory over his father. Without hesitation, he began ramming his manhood into his mother. The sensation was breathtaking, for both of them. Ushi watched herself and her son and couldn't help but revisit the sensation of feelings from that moment. Adramalech had been so much bigger than his father, in every way. And so much wilder and more boisterous. Where his father had, for lack of better words, made love to her, sex with Adramalech was a roller coaster ride of emotions. Pain, lust, horniness, wrapped in a package of wild love and primal violence. She loved it. He took her to heights she had never reached before and still he was able to take it up a notch.
Her younger self moaned her pleasure and desire into the night, pressing against the steam ram that was her son's manhood. His thrusts came fast and powerful. He penetrated so deeply with each thrust that she feared he would come out the front of her. It was all happening so fast. She could already feel herself getting more and more tense and how he was also intensifying his efforts once again, for one last spurt.
Ushi sat not far from the two and could not help but touch himself again. The atmosphere was too contagious. Hectically she rubbed her clitoris and fought not to get left behind by herself and Adramalech. She knew what was about to happen and she desperately wanted to climax before they did. It almost felt like she could do it while in front of her, her former self and her son climaxed. Adramalech bit her neck and held her tightly so she couldn't escape at the last moment. This feeling was enough for her to make it over the threshold, closely followed by her son.
Together they screamed their orgasm out into the cold night. Even as Ushi screamed, Adramalech bit down and ripped out a large chunk of her throat. Her former self died instantly. He had kept his word, she had not felt.
Quite the opposite of Ushi, who felt death in her own body in this dream. She felt the pain as her son ripped out her throat. Like every night, she collapsed gurgling. She wanted to scream, but could not. Through the veil of tears she could see her former body burst into flames, and she felt that sensation in her own body as well. This unspeakable heat that seemed to burn her from the inside out. This all overshadowing pain that robbed her of all senses and made her muscles spasm. She wanted to scream... scream and lash out, but the dream wouldn't let her. Endless moments passed as she slowly died... each night anew.
Just before her vision faded, she saw her son turn to her and seem to look directly into her eyes. He moved his lips, but she already couldn't hear anything anymore. Her vision faded, darkness fell, the heat lingered for a moment... and the pain... that unspeakable, unbearable, physical and psychological pain...
Hangover
... She opened her eyes.
Like every night she was drenched in sweat. Her limbs ached and her eyes were red. She felt hoarse, as if she had been screaming for a long time.
Carefully she felt over her throat. The scars were there, but they had healed long ago. She looked down at herself. No burnt fur. Groaning, she got up and crept outside.
How infinitely she missed the chill of the night on the savannah. She dragged herself to a slightly elevated ledge and collapsed, powerless.
Tears welled up in her eyes and she could not stop herself from crying.
How long she lay there silently crying she did not know. Not every night was as bad. Some nights didn't affect her as much as others. This one had been especially bad.
"The dream again?"
Ushi was startled; she hadn't heard the other lioness coming. The lioness with the number 112 was especially good at sneaking up on her. She had been an excellent hunter during her lifetime. Her voice was full of affection and understanding. Ushi answered the question in the affirmative and moved a little to make room for her. The other lioness lay down with her and snuggled up.
"I'd like to help you, but with that... I can't help you with that."
She laid her head against Ushi's and purred softly. Ushi closed her eyes and enjoyed the affection.
"Your comfort is help enough Sarabi. No one can take this burden from me. It is my punishment for bringing this demon into the world."
Sarabi nodded mutely in continued snuggling, giving the other lioness support. Sarabi was the only other lioness who had similar life experience as Ushi before her death. The only lioness who had gone through even the slightest similarities to Ushi. The two had hit it off right away and both took on the role of mother to the rest of the Harem.
"Don't blame yourself alone for your son's fall. You were not solely responsible for his upbringing. Your partner bears at least equal blame."
Offered Sarabi. Ushi nodded again, she could not disagree.
"How's your search going? Did you find him?"
Sarabi grinned.
"I'll tell you about that another time."
And this is how I got damned