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The force of the nuclear blasts are felt even in the depths of hell. The demons rejoice as the hellish sky repeatedly rips open to rain the damned down upon them. Baphomet turns to his cousin Krampus and says, "I guess Christmas is canceled this year?" Krampus has a sour look on his black goat muzzle and says, "Might as well grab a bite to eat before we get started."

Walking into Restaurante Baphomet, the owner Baphomet kicks the jukebox to turn it on and yells, "It's confirmed! World War Three: The Nuclear Apocalypse!" Peter the whitetail deer looks out from the kitchen in surprise as the dozens of goat demons let out a cheer. The song Nuclear by Mike Oldfield drones poignantly in the background.

Baphomet moves his body in a hypnotic rhythm. Everyone's eyes go down from the black furred goat head down to the nude human torso with a very well endowed penis that waves as he dances. The goat legs have fur going up to make him look like he is wearing thigh length stockings. Baphomet knows everyone is watching him dance and sensually glides his hooves around on the floor in time with the music.

Most of the goat demons in the restaurant shift uncomfortably in their armor as they experience sexual arousal. Krampus joins in and playfully matches Baphomet's dance. The two dance nude in the restaurant as their mesmerized kin watch. The song comes to an end and everyone applauds the dance.

Baphomet makes his way to the counter and Peter asks, "Master Baphomet, what year is it?" Baphomet looks directly in Peter's wide eyes and asks, "You're here for eternity. Why do you care?" Peter looks down at his still angelically clean apron and says, "I just want to know if my family had enough time to forget about me." Tears stream down Peter's muzzle as he thinks about everyone he knew dying.

Varnish the black wolf wipes his paws on his dirty apron and says, "You used to murder people for fun. Stop acting like such an emotional bitch." Peter reaches a hand in his apron pocket and squeezes the miniature bible he keeps and asks again, "What year?" Baphomet answers, "2037 AD." Peter does the math in his head and accepts the answer.

Peter gets to work helping Varnish box up pizzas as they come out of the oven and realizes the joke that they are all mushrooms only. Baphomet laughs with his fellow demons and passes them out.

The restaurant shakes again like it has been for the past hour. Peter finishes the last pizza and sets it on the counter. A large black goat demon in platemail armor snatches it away and heads off to find a seat. Baphomet gloats, "After we get through processing our share of all the sinners, how about we all take a group trip to piss in the lake of hell?" The goats raise their cups and cheer again.

Krampus looks between all the pizza boxes in disappointment that Baphomet didn't order one to satisfy his sweet tooth. Krampus' naked black furred body towers over Peter and is quite intimidating as he steps up to the counter. Peter is a stark contrast, an average antlerless whitetail deer. Peter asks, "Hello mister Krampus, what can I get for you today?" Krampus answers, "One pepperoni and marshmallow." Peter presses the pizza button. Krampus looks at the total on the register and uses sleight of hand to produce coins. It's a handy trick Krampus uses to carry things despite being nude. Peter takes the coins and inserts them into the slot.

Varnish violently throws marshmallows and pepperoni at the pizza crust and sets it on the oven conveyor. To Peter's lack of surprise the pizza magically comes out perfect because it's for Krampus. Peter boxes it up and hands it to the waiting Krampus.

Krampus pushes an armored goat demon further in a booth and sits down across from Baphomet to enjoy his pizza. Krampus takes a bite and savors the sweet and savory concoction. Baphomet looks down at the pizza and reaches over to grab a slice of mushroom pizza from someone else's box.

With a worried look at the door to check for more customers, Peter makes his way to the payphone and picks up the receiver. He dials 666 and after the second ring a voice answers, "Hell's hotline. How can I torture you today?" Peter knows it's a terrible idea to ask but says, "I want to know how my son is doing." The voice politely says, "One Moment." Peter hears more talking and shouting than usual in the background due to the current situation.

The voice returns and says, "Randall is currently dying from burns and lethal radiation exposure at the moment." The voice continues to describe all the horrific symptoms in excruciating details. Peter falls to his knees crying as he can't physically pull the receiver from his ear and is forced to listen. The receiver unlocks from his ear and the voice asks, "Anyone else you would like me to look up?" Peter answers, "My Ex-wife."

The voice answers, "Died in the initial blasts with the much better man she left you for. They received enough warning to lovingly embrace and kiss one last time before painlessly being vaporized." The answers cut Peter deep and he sobs. The voice says in a satisfied tone, "Thank you for calling!" The dial tone suddenly blares loudly as Peter cries on the floor with regret for asking.

Varnish stands over Peter and says, "Fucking idiot. It's that angelically blessed apron fucking with your mind again. You are only doing this to yourself." The restaurant is rocked by another boom of thunder to punctuate Varnish's point.

Varnish's hand goes to the knot in the apron strings in a futile attempt to untie them but his hand passes right through like always. Varnish orders, "Take it off and throw it in the trash!"

Peter yells back, "No! It's worth it. It cures me. I didn't understand how broken and wrong I was to do the things I've done. I'm a better person now." Varnish pulls a knife out of his apron and says, "You're pathetic. Take a nap." Varnish plunges the knife around the side of the apron and directly into Peter's heart.

Peter tries to maintain a modicum of dignity by not screaming or struggling as life temporarily leaves his body. Varnish pulls the knife out and says, "Fuck! Why did you make me do that? Now I have to skip my next break until you wake up." Varnish uses a footpaw to push Peter mostly out of the way and goes back behind the counter.

Everything gets farther away as Peter leaves his body. He's floating through a static filled rainbow of color and all he can think about is his son. Peter is drawn to something and he opens his eyes. Everything looks wrong as Peter watches his son's half burned and blind flesh prison crawl through the rubble. The sound of screams echo around him.

Peter reaches for his son with a ghostly hand and touches the fur on his arm that wasn't burned away. Randall stops his struggling and looks up with his melted eye sockets. Peter says, "I'm sorry for what I put you and your mother through." Randall reaches out in front of him and his hands pass through his father's spirit.

A voice behind him says, "Hello traveler. Don't often see them come up from hell to guide their decendants to the afterlife, but I appreciate the help in these trying times." A female deer in black robes steps up beside Peter and says, "You're a bit early though. This one has at least a few days of suffering to get through." Peter glances at the spirit of death and asks, "Isn't there anything we can do to speed things along?" The deer points to a giant concrete pillar that wasn't knocked over in the initial blast and says, "I usually wouldn't recommend anything to jeopardize someone's salvation, but since you're already damned, that pillar looks a little wobbly, if you know what I mean?"

Peter's eyes are drawn to the pillar and he estimates the spot on the floor where it would fall. Peter bends down to whisper in his son's burnt off ear, "This way son, I'm trying to do you one last favor."

Whether Randall actually heard his father or not, is unclear as Peter coaxes his son to crawl towards him. Peter presses his hand on Randall's head and he stops crawling. The spirit of death watches in fascination as Peter starts pressing against the pillar, rocking it. Peter's hooves fail to gain purchase on the rubble. Peter backs up and gives one last shove, toppling the pillar.

The pillar smashes down on Randall's body with a thud and the radioactive blood pools on the floor. The spirit of death gives a golf clap and says, "Well done. Not many have the resolve to personally put them out of their misery." The euphemism causes Peter's ethereal body to ripple with existential uncertainty. Peter looks down at his naked fur body and realizes the apron didn't come with him. Peter then realizes he killed his son without hesitation. He killed a lot of people with the justification that they were going to die one day anyway and he was putting them out of their misery.

Peter asks, "Was that wrong what I did?" The spirit of death answers, "Probably, but what are they gonna do? Send you to double hell?" Randall's spirit releases from his body and he asks with confusion, "Dad?" The spirit of death says, "There is a long line at the pearly gates. You two can catch up while you wait." A brightly lit doorway opens out of thin air and the spirit of death gestures towards it. Peter puts his arm around his son and escorts him through.

The line to get into heaven stretches on into the distance. Angels fly overhead, overseeing the procession. It moves at a continuous pace so they walk and talk.

Peter awkwardly says, "Been a long time hasn't it?" Peter gets a good look at the buck that his son grew into. Randall sports a muscular body with a hefty set of balls. Peter would have loved to have seen how many points his son's antlers were, but it's not the season. Randall hugs his father and says, "You're a lot less scary than I remember." Peter awkwardly hugs his adult son back and says, "I thought I did a good job keeping the scary parts separate from the family part." Randall says, "A documentary they made about you might have skewed things in my memories."

The crowd pushes forward and they continue walking through the bright, cloudy, and relaxing void. The quiet trumpets and harps in the distance really sell the experience. Peter smirks when he sees that the majority of those around him are anthros.

Peter repeats the line he has been rehearsing, "You've always been on my mind. I wanted to tell you I'm sorry if what I did in my life made things harder for you." Randall answers, "It did for a while, but then we moved away and I took my stepfather's last name. I was just a nobody who was always vague about my real father."

Peter wishes he had the angelic apron. He pushes through not feeling any interest in his son's life and asks a question he already knows the answer to, "Did you ever get married and have fawns?" Randall looks around and says, "Yeah, My wife Jane, and our two daughters Gale and Tabitha. They don't know about who you were, but what if they didn't survive? I can't exactly lie to them in heaven can I?" Randall abruptly changes the subject and asks, "Wait, how are you here in heaven?" Peter answers, "You're not in heaven yet, this is just the limbo area outside the gates."

Putting one hoof in front of the other, they walk for a while as Randall thinks about his situation. Randall asks, "So what, I'm just going to leave you outside the gate?" Peter answers, "I don't mind. Once you get settled in, you can phone me down in the bad place. It's a special brand of torture having a loved one describe all the wonders of the kingdom of heaven." Randall asks, "They have phones in hell?" Peter answers, "Yes. I chose to work for a demon and get special privileges."

Randall asks, "You work for a demon? Torturing people?" Peter tints the truth with a bit of a lie, "Nothing so exciting. I manage a restaurant that caters to his kinfolk." Randall says, "Sounds mundane enough." Peter attempts a joke, "Got to keep busy or they torture you extra."

They pass close to an angel standing on a cloud watching over the presession. Randall looks up at the white robed winged human and the angel glares down at them. Peter puts an arm around Randall and uses his practiced innocent smile. The angel has bigger things to worry about and overlooks them. Randall says, "He didn't look too happy to see you." Peter replies, "Don't worry about it."

They finally reach judgment and the line separates out the humans from the anthros. Randall asks, "They have segregation in heaven?" Peter smiles and says, "Not for the reason you think. Anthros get a free pass into heaven as long as we aren't too bad." Randall asks, "Why?" Peter answers, "It's complicated. You'll have all the time in the afterlife to read up about it."

Peter can feel the pull of his spirit to the fleshy prison he's stuck inside in hell. They finally reach the front of the line and Randall gets waved inside the pearly gates. Randall looks back at his poor father and says, "I'll call, once I get settled in. What's your phone number?" Peter waves as he fades away and calls out, "Just dial 666."

Everything hurts as Peter opens his eyes. He feels a pain in his tailhole as a goat demon sodomizes him. A voice says, "He's waking up. Hurry up and finish." The pain in his tailhole throbs faster as the goat dick slams in and out. Peter says, "We have all manner of things to use as lube around here." The goat smiles and says, "We don't use lube in hell."

The crowd of voyeur goats stroke their clothed crotches and eat slices of pizza. Peter feels his apron hugging against his body and strokes his fingers against the neck strap with reassurance. He slides against the apron under him and starts to get his bearings. Peter lays still and finds a slight enjoyment from the penis pressing repeatedly against his prostate. His butt and inner thighs are wet and Peter surmises that several of them took turns while he was away.

The goat pulls on Peter's deer tail and lets out a few high pitched grunts as he reaches a climax. The goat lets his demonic seed penetrate deep and Peter feels it burn inside him.

With a satisfied sigh, the goat slides himself out and says, "That really hit the spot. Time to get to work guys." The goat pulls up his armored pants and they walk out the door leaving Baphomet and Krampus still discussing something. Peter lays on the floor motivating himself to get back to work.

When he finally stands up, Peter looks around at the mess the goats left in the restaurant. Peter resigns himself to gathering the cups and empty pizza boxes. He tries not to walk funny as his guts feel full of cum.

Varnish yells, "Hey fuckhole! There is a big load of dishes waiting for you in the sink, if you are done taking big loads of cum." Peter turns the other cheek as the angelic apron fills his head with the ideals of forgiveness. Peter wipes the crumbs off tables and finishes cleaning up the dining area.

Varnish looks at Peter with annoyance as he makes his way to the back in a zen like manner. Scrubbing each pizza pan and tool gives Peter time to think about his son being up in heaven. Peter doesn't even flinch when Varnish splashes him by dumping more things to wash into the sink. Varnish looks at the puddle of cum on the floor at Peter's feet and says, "Once you're done with this, mop the floor too. I'm taking my break now." Peter looks over and nods solemnly.

After finishing the dishes, Peter leans his butt against the industrial sink and points the sprayer hose at himself. The high pressure stream of water rinses the cum off his backside. The pearly white demon cum swirls around in the empty sink and goes down the drain. Peter dutifully mops up the stray water and cum from around the sink.

Peter walks out to see Krampus and Baphomet still sitting in the lobby talking. Peter makes his way to Baphomet's table and gathers up the rest of the empty pizza boxes at the table. He places them inside the mostly full trash can and carefully changes out the too thin trash bag.

The sky is a gradient of strange colors from the nuclear radiation. It hurts more than usual to look at, as Peter hurries across the parking lot to the dumpster. The door on the side slides open loudly and Peter stares into the dark abyss. He chucks the bag in and listens to it ripple in the wind as it takes several seconds to loudly hit the bottom. A voice echos, "Peter is that you?"

Peter leans on the edge of the door and says down to the voice, "Yeah, lots of good crusts left in some of those boxes." The sound of the trash being dug through echoes from far down below. The voice tries to make conversation and asks, "Lots of rumbling noises out there today. Is something going on?" Peter nods and says, "Nuclear armageddon." The voice says, "Oh geez, that sucks."

Peter says, "I'm sorry to trouble you, but I somehow managed to take a trip to earth to see my dying son and something happened." The voice asks with a mouthful of pizza crust, "What happened?" Peter reaches into his apron pocket to grip his bible tight and continues, "I killed him. He was dying, but I just wanted it to be over with." The voice is intrigued and states, "With all the chaos, I don't think anyone will notice your meddling." Peter says, "Someone did. Death was there. She encouraged me to kill him and I did without hesitation. I had a choice and I chose to sin."

Peter's eyes start leaking tears as he stares into the abyss. The voice says, "Sounds like a mercy killing to me. Do you need to be punished for what you did, Peter?" Peter looks up and answers, "I don't know. That wouldn't absolve me of it. I just needed someone to confess it to." The voice asks, "Why didn't you tell Baphomet?" Peter answers truthfully, "He kind of has a lot going on right now." The voice laughs and states, "I'll bet he does."

A dirty feline comes stumbling over the hills surrounding the restaurant. Peter sees the figure and says, "I have to get back to work." The voice says, "Bye! Don't forget to close the door." Peter slides closed the door to the dumpster and weaves between the burnt out cars and broken glass in the parking lot to walk inside.

The cat enters the dining area and looks around in astonishment. Like most anthros he wears no clothing, letting Peter get a closer inspection to recognize that the dirty cat is a siamese with the traditional markings of a black face, ears, limbs, and tail on what used to be white fur.

Peter says, "Welcome to Restaurante Baphomet. Are you here looking for a job or did you come to see Lord Baphomet?" The cat looks around in astonishment and asks, "Uhh, may I use the restroom?" Peter frowns and says, "Sorry, that's for customers and employees only." The cat says, "Come on, Slob-Knocker. Who's gonna know?" Peter answers, "Lord Baphomet."

Baphomet slides a napkin across the table to Krampus and says, "Do me a favor." Krampus pull his magic quill out of thin air and writes, 'Danny Xuefeng: Arson, financial fraud, suicide.'

Baphomet and Krampus get up from their booth and make their presence known. Baphomet asks, "The world is coming to it's end and you killed yourself prematurely, Danny?" The cat takes in the black goat with a shaved body and says, "Fuck you! I ended it on my own terms. Who the fuck are you?" Baphomet glances at Krampus and says, "I'm the previously mentioned Lord Baphomet. You come into my restaurant using language like that?"

Baphomet's hooves clack loudly as he takes steps towards the cat. Danny looks around for an escape plan and gracefully jumps backwards towards the door. The door is unmoving as the cat pulls and pushes at it. Baphomet says, "This restaurant is a piece of me. I control everything in it." Danny knows he is trapped and says, "Fine then. Are you gonna rape me?"

Baphomet pulls out a dirty apron from behind his back and says, "Don't flatter yourself. I'm looking for a new employee." Danny looks around and asks, "What?" Baphomet smiles and says in a sing-song voice, "If you work here. You can use my bathroom." Danny looks outside the dirty window and says, "Fuck it. I'm not doing anything better." Baphomet snaps his fingers and the apron appears on Danny.

With excitement Peter says, "I will train him!" Baphomet nods his head and says, "I love how things just fall into place. Time to go, Krampus." Varnish eyeballs the cat and says, "He looks like he's going to cause trouble." Baphomet replies, "Well then, I'll just have to punish him if he does."

The two goat demons exit the restaurant leaving Danny, Peter and Varnish alone. Varnish says, "Well then get to training him, kiss ass. I'm going for another high score run." Varnish lights up a cigarette and makes his way to the arcade machine beside the jukebox. The sound of credits chime as the black wolf knees the coin slot a few times. He is quickly in his own world.

Danny asks Peter, "Where do you get cigarettes around here?" Peter shrugs and says, "He finds them around and puts them in his personal locker." Danny asks, "Where are the lockers?" Peter leads Danny to the office and a row of lockers are just inside the doorway. Danny looks at the old computer with a CRT monitor and says, "This place is so retro." Peter states, "It's better than nothing."

The lockers now have the names of the three employees on them. Danny asks, "Are you Peter or Varnish?" Peter answers, "Peter." Danny says, "Okay, Pete." Danny tries to pull open Varnish's locker and it won't budge. Danny says, "How do you open this thing?" Peter replies, "It won't open since it doesn't belong to you." Danny kicks the locker and says, "I thought we were gonna steal some cigarettes?" Peter responds, "Just check your own locker. There is some stuff left from the last person."

Danny opens his locker to find it filled with odds and ends. Pieces of candy, jewelry, wallets, key chain charms, pens, lighters, and half a pack of cigarettes. Danny grabs the cigarette pack and quickly lights one up. Danny asks, "Where does this shit come from?" Peter answers, "People sometimes wander in and trade for a slice of pizza."

Peter opens his own locker to reveal it filled with several jars of coins and stacks of money from around the world. Danny eyes the cash and says, "What are you saving up for?" Peter's eyes tear up and he says, "I saved it up while I was trying to figure out a way to send it to my son." Danny says, "That's ironic. It's supposed to be the other way around. People send their ancestors money in the afterlife." Peter grabs a couple of coins out of the jar and stuffs them in his apron.

The locker swings shut and Danny attempts to open it back up. It doesn't budge. Peter says, "It's a small comfort. I suggested to Baphomet that we have some place to put stuff where it can't be stolen." Danny swings his own locker shut. The hours pass mercifully fast as Peter shows Danny the ropes.

The payphone in the lobby rings and Peter drops what he is doing to answer it. Peter puts the receiver up to his ear and hears the message in a beautiful angelic voice, "This is a call from Paradiso for Peter. Please insert the connection tax." Peter stuffs his coins into the coin slot. The voice says, "You have four minutes and twenty seven seconds."

The line clicks a few times and Peter asks, "Hello?" A voice clearer than the telephone has ever been, answers, "Hey Dad!" Peter holds his tears and says, "It's good to hear from you Randall. How are you settling in?" Randall says, "This place is amazing. I met up with my wife, Jane, in our new mansion. She was waiting for me with our kids. We kissed and hugged a lot. One thing led to another when she was giving me a tour and I made love to her on the softest silk bed sheets." Peter nods and says, "Good for you guys."

Randall lowers his voice and says, "I had the hardest time trying to find a landline. My smartphone wouldn't let me dial 666 to reach you. I'm at a church, which is kind of strange. The deer angels are giving me dirty looks." Peter clutches the bible in his apron and says, "Not all the angels are open minded. The sins of your father probably weigh heavily upon you." Randall says, "Oh no! I still haven't told my family about you. What am I going to do?" Peter answers, "You are in a church. Ask them for spiritual guidance."

A voice cuts in, "Thirty seconds remaining. Insert more coins." Randall asks, "This is a collect call?" Peter replies, "Yeah, but don't worry about it. I want to let you know, I love you Randall." The words get caught in Randall's throat as he replies, "I.. I.. I... I'll call you again as soon as I can, Dad. Bye." The line clicks off and Peter hangs the phone back up. He leans against the arcade machine and analyzes the short conversation. Varnish yells, "Get your dirty tailhole off my machine and get back to work."