Unspoken | Chapter 1
The first part of (hopefully) many, the story between a man and his lover, though at some point something has gone quite wrong. What challenges are soon to come? What will be their next steps? Will they ever bone? Probably.
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They told me he was gone. That there was no possible way his mind was still intact after all that he had been through. Everything that I had seen, everything that he had done, was just a facade to manipulate me. Despite it all, he was not there. The man I knew was gone. I didn't believe them, of course I didn't believe them. How could they possibly ever understand the situation better than me? I was there! I knew what I saw and there was nobody on this planet who knew better. Though none of that mattered now.
I don't think they planned on having someone like me in one of these things.
The chill of the cold metal crept straight through my clothing, despite my thick layers. They had let me take things, a whole suitcase actually. I was surprised, but then again, they probably assumed I was just going to die the second the gate opened.
The room suddenly shook, I threw my hand against the scattered straw covered floor, the ice cold metal biting against my gloved finger tips. The growl of this strange vehicle's engine, and the bumps of some dirt road. We must have started moving again. Wisps of light flickered through a window just above and hit the walls within this steel prison but it was far too high off the ground for me to catch a breadth of anything other than the quickly passing tree tops. Maybe he could see out of it, wherever he was.
I hadn't seen him for a while, he made it clear that it was all going to be okay and honestly, it was getting hard to believe him. The words of the agents floated back to me, the image of their identical tightly fit three piece black suits bringing with them a level of instinctual terror. They told me they wouldn't help me, that I would die alone, and that the beast he now was would eat me alive.
A piercing pain in my heart came as I realized he was there to hear that. I honestly hadn't thought about that till now, he was in the room. They had put him in that cage, gagged him and tied him up. He didn't even resist, we both had turned ourselves in willingly. I mean, it was his decision, who was I to tell him no? I coldly chuckled to myself, the whole idea of something this absurd happening to me would have been a fever dream a few months ago. But now it was a reality, one that I most definitely couldn't ignore.
“Why are you doing this?" An agent had asked, he held actual sympathy on his face, more than the faked smiles and knowing nods of his colleagues .
I remember turning to him and speaking the plainest of fact, my mind conflicted on many things, but not this. “Because you're wrong, because he's there."
The Agent shook his head, clearly pitying me. “And what if we're wrong? You'll be stuck out there for the rest of your life. Is that what you want? Is that what he wants?"
I had answers to that question, but nothing formed in the moment. It had taken me off guard, the question, it was exactly what I was asking myself. We hadn't talked about this at all, the whole conversation that led to this situation happened after he had already left the room. Was this what he wanted?
The metal box I sat within lurched once again, though this time to a stop. I wondered if we had finally arrived, and I didn't need to wonder long. A wall shifted suddenly and with no fan fair. The whining of hydraulics was all that made the action known, though soon that was joined by the faintest slices of light peaking through the cracks.
I grabbed the suitcase and wheeled it to the wall that now lowered, cursing to myself as straw and other debris got stuck between the wheels. I quickly realized how in vain it was to worry about that as I looked forward. We were in the mountains, probably not far from my home, but most definitely on the other side of the wall. A forest stretched for miles around, and I could see the massive lakes I had grown up knowing to my right. There was no civilization here, not on the other side of these walls.
My steps were hesitant, and slow. The tall trees, dying grass, and picturesque mountain view would be beautiful if not for the fact that I was to be here for what would most likely be the rest of my life. The weight of that fact only now sunk in, my knee jerk decision all but twelve hours ago had brought me here, and there was now nothing I could do to save myself.
But at least I would be with him, and I wouldn't need to worry about his survival.
My thoughts were broken quickly as I stepped forward, as it was clear I was not alone. To my left sat another one of those metal cubes, towed by a large armored truck entirely sealed from the outside. The shadows within the cube stirred, something massive shifting within, the weight of which caused the whole vehicle to rock. My eyes stayed glued to the shadows, hoping that I hadn't made some horrible mistake and that he would be the one within that box.
It was a beast that emerged from the shadow, it's slick gray head lifted quickly, four almost glowing amber eyes, two on either side of it's shark-like head scanned the horizon. I watched it take a nervous step forward, it's many eyes darting to any and all unknown sounds that it heard. A large similarly gray paw stepped out, the step forward revealing the thick muscular arm it was attached to, and the body that trailed out after. A tall fin sat atop the creature's back, and a similar one upon the large trailing tail too.
I watched in restrained wonder, and a bit of terror. It was him, I knew it was him. I was beyond thrilled that it was him. I tried my best to remove the nagging worry that the agents were somehow right from my mind. I watched him step out slowly, honestly surprised he hadn't seen me, but that wasn't what stood out to me. It was clear he was sad, his head was hung low, his tail drug behind him, he believed that I was gone. I hoped that he would be happy to see me, and not angry that I came along.
Then he saw me. It was honestly beautiful to see the visible transformation from sadness, to confusion, to immense joy in such an alien creature. Though the instinctual terror of having a massive beast easily three times the size of you lunge almost a hundred feet in a couple seconds did eclipse that feeling quite a bit. His head, which was easily as large as the entirety of my torso, immediately buried itself in my shoulder as an arm wrapped around me.
The feeling of his new dense blubbery skin hadn't really grown on me yet, but I could feel the tears brewing as he gave a deep growling whine with his excitement. He pulled away for a quick moment, looking me deeply in the eyes, well some of his eyes looking me deeply in the eyes, before pulling me back in for what would technically be called a kiss. The feeling of that thick blubbery skin against my lips was still entirely foreign, and something that my mind itself seemed to lightly recoil at, but with how much he loved kisses I would be a fool to say anything about it.
He pulled away again, his large eyes inspecting me with the lightest of smiles. Well, I say that, he couldn't really smile anymore, but I could tell when he was happy, his eyes told a story. A large reverberating purr grew from him as he looked at me. One he had made sure to make its meaning well known to me.
"I love you too Leo." The first words I had said in more than half a day, poetic.
His eyes didn't pull away from me, but his emotions most definitely shifted. He went from purely ecstatic that I was here, to confused once again, then his eyes grew immensely wide. The reality had to hit him eventually, it would seem. His head bounced in the air around me, his many eyes darting through the forest, the weight of my presence making him far more anxious. Though, in that moment, he turned back towards me, all eyes focusing upon my comparatively tiny body, with a look of definite anger. I locked up tight as he did so, fear flooding my system, the sight of this large inhuman creature bearing any sort of negative emotion towards me was definitely an instinctual red flag.
But I knew what he was thinking, he was angry I was here, because he knew the ramifications of it all. “I- I'm sorry, I… I couldn't leave you." I began my words quietly to begin with but my confidence in the words grew immediately. “They gave me the option, how could I possibly turn it down!"
"They tried to tell me you were gone, and I… I couldn't trust you."
As soon as the words left my mouth I knew they were going to hurt. I could see Leo's head drop as the weight of what I said hit him. “I don't know why they said that. I… it was like they wanted you to be a beast."
Leo gave a long gurgling breath, it was a sigh, or at least his alien attempt at one. He shook his head in irritation before staring off towards the forest. Only to look back towards me and give me his most pleading look.
“Okay, let's go then. I don't think this is a good place to talk either." I said with a dry laugh.
I looked back down towards the ground remembering that I still stood upon the large metal ramp that was once the wall to my prison. I took the step carefully, I didn't want to fall and ruin however many days I now had left with the clothing I wore. That thought alone bothered me more than anything I could ever imagine thinking, it was a simple thought, yet one that brought with it such a terrible reality.
My first steps upon the grass were slow, and unsteady. I lacked the confidence I knew Leo had in this situation, it was something I always loved in him, and something that seemingly hadn't faded even though I knew he hurt. Having almost forgotten about the suitcase, I turned back to grab it, only to realize that Leo was halfway through holding in his jaws, the act alone baffling me. I opened my mouth to prevent bite marks, but immediately closed it as the reality of me carrying it through this horrible forest was not one I wanted to bear.
The forest, as much as I wanted to hate it, was actually quite beautiful, the massive oak trees towered so beautifully with their fall colored leaves. I thankfully could spot a few greener ones sprouting within the branches, a sign that this horrible cold was soon to end. Below sat piles and piles of dead leaves, though long since the process of rotting and becoming fuel for the green grass that now peaked it's way through the cracks.
Though, in front of us, was truly one of the most jaw dropping sights, a massive mountain range spanning easily hundreds of miles past the horizon sat far from where we stood. Though in that valley, the one we stood within, a lake had formed, one far larger than what you probably would have imagined. It was the size of a city, easily, probably a couple dozen miles from one side to the other, an incredible sight to be sure, but a horrific reminder of what was happening in this moment.
Leo led first, probably because he didn't want me to be the one to run into whatever trouble we may face. The path wasn't so thin as to stop two people from walking side to side, but when one of those people is a massive multi-tonne shark dog thing? It was going to be a line no matter what.
I trusted Leo to lead us to somewhere safe, not that I was even sure what that would be. He, thankfully, was always the 'natural guy' and easily the most enthusiastic person I'd ever met when it came to camping and exploring what nature held. The way, even now, he looked towards those beautiful sights was something that I always adored. And then when he turned that love towards me? Oh, I fell apart in a moment.
Though as each of his surprisingly quiet steps swayed his body back and forth, I couldn't help but watch as that finned tail shifted back and forth. An absolute log of a limb that could easily knock me on my feet if misplaced. Something so inhuman and to a point unreal, sitting on the love of my life. What would that even mean in the end?
Suddenly we deviated from the path, a hard left hand turn into the dense winter dead brush that I had been watching so intently. “Leo?" I asked mostly out of worry. “Did you see something?" My voice fell to a whisper as the anxiety of that possibility hit me.
Leo turned back with his smile and shook his head, before flicking it forward towards the brush. It wasn't like I was going to not follow him, so that's what I did.
The brush sucked, it was wet, cold, and a professional at somehow getting stuck between my hiking boot and my socks. I was not a fan. Especially when I yelped in pain as a stick dug itself into my leg, definitely not fun once Leo realized and started to giggle to himself. Or well, more purr in bursts.
Between keeping my eyes down towards the ground to watch out for more dangerous sticks, I tried to look for whatever we were actually making our way towards. Was it something that Leo had smelled? Had he smelled another person? What would that even mean?
Another branch snagged me in that moment of watching, this time digging into the tiniest bit of exposed skin that was between my gloves and my winter coat. Leo giggled to himself again before lowering his head in front of me. The action confused me for a good few moments before Leo pushed his head between my legs and forced me onto his neck. The action took me very much off guard, and almost threw me to the ground, though I imagine Leo felt that as he leaned off towards the side to give me the balance I needed as to not face plant. I slowly steadied myself upon the slick blubbery skin that was my husband's neck, as weird as an idea as that was to wrap around my mind.
I gave a few half hearted looks around the quiet forest as Leo's body swayed beneath me. From this vantage I could see more, but still, other than the lake it was brush in every direction. Instead, I ran a hand across the blubbery skin of Leo. It was almost exactly how I imagined dolphins would feel, though a decent bit rougher. Very jiggly though, well, just like blubber.
This was how it began, actually. Leo and I had just gotten back from a wonderful anniversary dinner, he had spent so much money getting us a reservation at this big fancy place with the little plates. I was honestly thrilled, it was so nice, and the wine was amazing but… when we got home, he complained about a rash. I remember telling him that his days of wearing rough clothing were finally catching up to him, but then he told me it was on his arm. A greying patch of skin that spelled the end of an era.
A sudden jerk yanked me out of my train of thought. Leo had stopped and began to look up towards me, motioning forward. A large cliff stood before us, white stone slowly flaking away at the edges, with a collection of brush and vines lining the bottom.
“Um… what? Are we climbing this?" I asked, trying my best to see if I missed something.
Leo sighed and with one of his large claws he pulled a decent chunk of the brush away like a curtain, revealing a large gaping crack in the stone. As he pulled more and more of the brush away it revealed more and more deep darkness of a large cave. I was honestly surprised that it just kept going if anything.
“O- Oh, I see. Do you want me to…?" I began to ask, though quickly received my answer with a nod.
I slowly, and very clumsily jumped from Leo's back onto the ground. Leo whined loudly as I did so, my form was clearly not up to his standards. “I'm fine! Just… gonna have to get used to that."
Leo frowned and flicked his head towards the cave. I nodded and carefully stepped through the dense brush towards the rocky opening. The dark expanse of the cave seemed to stretch past the opening much farther than I could see. Though, with Leo's senses, I imagined that there was nothing to worry about.
Leo pushed through, leaving a small gap with his tail for me to follow in afterwards like a duckling following his mother. He pushed almost immediately into the darkness, turning down a harsh turn and disappearing into the shadow. I could still hear his footfalls, as hefty as they were. However, I could not see him at all. I could hear the sounds of dribbling water, but almost nothing else other than them. Stumbling through with my hand on the wall, I tried to follow through, but very quickly slammed my foot into a large rock.
I gave a yelp, immediately hearing Leo stop and probably look around. I still couldn't see him though. “Leo…? I- I can't see anything." There was a level of fear in my voice that I didn't realize I had, my emotions muddled in the moment.
I heard a light whine and a huff, the sound of immediate surprise and worry from what I could assume. Many thumping foot falls fell before I felt his head slowly tap my chest, not wanting to scare me. I put my hand on his head, hearing him purr at that was always so heartwarming to me, but now definitely wasn't the time. Instead, he pulled away, letting his thick tail drag across my chest till the fin almost slapped me in the face. I could hear him whine a bit, still worried for me, but I only nodded to the darkness and gripped tightly.
It was thick, the fin, a decent bit thicker than my hand, and very tough. I guess I shouldn't have been surprised, it had to push his weight in water after all. Not that we had tried that yet, or anything. We didn't walk as far as I thought we would, eventually Leo's movements stopped and I immediately felt his head against my chest again, once again purring.
“Are… are we at the end?"
My only reference for anything was the sound of his soft though hefty breathing, his footfalls and the faint echo of dribbling water. Though I couldn't place the location of any of those until he shoved his head into me. His head pulled away soon after, with the sound of some hefty plastic object rocking against the ground. My suitcase, it would seem. The scratching sound it made as Leo pushed it against my feet made me shiver. Get rid of all my earthly possessions and yet still the sound of my expensive suitcase is what bothered me…
I guessed he wanted me to open it, he couldn't speak, but I'd be damned if he wasn't good at communicating. The second the zipper fell, his head pushed past my arms, digging through the piles of clothing and random items I had in there. I still couldn't see anything, but I very much recognized the item that was thrown into my chest. A small cylindrical device, an item I rarely used, but I knew that Leo used quite often.
With a twist and a flick of the switch, the solar charged lantern faintly lit up the space around us. It had honestly only been a good few weeks since Leo had fully transformed, I had tried my best, in that time, to get used to all that was now him, and I was getting there, honestly! But even still, turning a light on and seeing a massive towering predator multiple times larger than you looming over you like you're a toy, immediately made me flinch.
Which of course, Leo saw, and I could see him whine with worry.
“S- Sorry, I'm fine, it's just… a little out of my element, you know." I watched him for a moment as he inspected me lovingly before I glanced around the cavern. It was a pretty decently sized area, though even still Leo barely fit in here. A large circular chamber with one exit out the way we came. Just like a room in a home.
The suitcase was laid out in front me, pretty haphazardly gone through, though nothing was actually out on the floor. I frowned and just sat down on the cold stone floor, looking back up towards my husband, who had never looked away. “So… what do we do now?"
Leo looked away, one pair of eyes focusing on the exit, the other looking somewhere behind me. A crazy visual but one I honestly was jealous about. Literally having eyes on the back of your head, must be nice. But he just sighed too, and collapsed on the ground as well. Though his process of sitting was far louder and far heavier than me as he took up almost the entirety of the room.
I looked away, back towards the suitcase, back towards all the things I needed to live while he had nothing. The sheer amount of things I needed to even function at a level that he would survive at with no problems. An immediate and painful reminder of what exactly I was in this situation.
He was sitting there, watching the doorway of the cave. I had no idea what he was thinking, what possible problems I caused or hells I'd lit. My mind revolved around the conversation I had not long ago. Was this what he wanted? I needed to respond.“I- I'm sorry, I… I thought it was a good idea and…"
Leo gaze snapped towards me, eyes full of worry as he almost looked on in disbelief, before he quickly shook his head.
“But… you're having to worry about me so much and I… I'm just a burden and…" I was a hair's breadth away from sobbing, but Leo's large paw pushed me in towards him before I could react. Pulling me into a tight, all encompassing hug. I reached my hands out to try to hug him too, but was only really able to embrace the side of his shoulder.
Tears flowed down my face for a few moments as I let myself submit to the emotions. “I thought I wasn't going to see you again, and they told me that you were gone and I… I didn't know what I needed to do and then you… you were gagged and tied down like some beast, when we just talked and I-“ I rambled on as Leo just pulled me in tighter, doing his best to knock all the air out of my chest.
The act just made me smile shakily. “Y-you always know what to do." I said with a broken laugh.
“I- I'm sorry. This is just a lot and…" Leo loosened his grip and eventually let go, watching as I stumbled back. He was shaking his head, his eyes still filled with worry. I opened my mouth to speak, but found myself immediately cut off by his large head forcing its way in front of mine, before pressing the front of his head against mine. Another kiss, though this time, I felt his massive mouth open slightly as a massive tongue pressed it's way into my mouth, filling it entirely, before running slowly across the top of my mouth.
“Ack- Fuck!" I immediately coughed, the stench of raw fish now permeating my senses almost immediately making me gag. “You… you kinky shit…" I said with a strained laugh. As weird as it was, it was a pretty quick and easy way to tell me that it didn't matter. And once again, he pressed his head into my chest and purred loudly. “I… I know. I love you too, more than you could imagine."
A warm moment was shared between the two of us in this dark space, even as he was now, I would rather spend all my time staring into those beautiful eyes over rummaging through a damp cold forest. Though like all good things, Leo lifted one of his massive webbed paws and pushed the suitcase closer, before motioning towards it. Bringing the reality of what he was to the forefront of my mind. I got the message and gave a sigh
The suitcase was full of literally anything I had the time to grab in the hour or so I had. I had over 8 pairs of clothing, a whole ball of socks, and a dozen pairs of underwear. A couple bottles and bags containing a bunch of body products, and then a bag of survival tools.
I swept off a space in the cold grey rock and began to lay out some clothes. Leo, seemingly recognizing the bag, grabbed the survival stuff and picked it up. “I tried to grab all the stuff that you normally took with you, but I mean… I'm not you."
Leo gave an uncommitting warble as he dug through the bag with his massive claws. Every few moments having to bring the bag closer to his dinner plate eyes to actually see what's inside. I watched, hoping that I actually grabbed the right things, and thankfully, with his happy little huffs Leo seemed to agree with me.
I sighed in relief and went back to unpacking, before even that was done too. I looked at all the assorted clothing, trying to guess how long this would last me. Trying to guess how long it would need to last me. I didn't know. I had no idea how long I was going to be here, if leaving was somehow even possible. The walls were thick, and they were very, very tall. Forty years they've been there, and even still they stand.
“What are we going to do, Leo?" I spoke the question out loud, finally vocalizing the thought I've had since this all began. Leo lifted his head, breaking his attention from the bag, his eye ridge raised confused from the question before realizing what I meant.
“I… I don't really know what I've gotten myself into Leo. I don't know what's going to happen." My voice cracked, there was too much weight on these moments for me to even to begin having any sort of mental stability here.
Leo stood up, setting the bag slowly on the ground, before, in a rush of air, laying down behind me, for his head to sit at eye level with me. He watched me for a few moments, I imagined he probably had a lot to say and no way to say it. I looked at him, at this alien creature. I knew he was my husband, I knew he was the man I loved, but I still craved the person he once was, not the thing was now.
I looked away towards the craggy stone walls. “Those news stories of… of people being turned into monsters and being dragged away they… They didn't seem real, you know? I thought they were making things up but…"
Leo shifted uncomfortably, a claw now digging at the stone floor anxiously.
"And even still, I thought that, even if they were true, they'd were saving us from all the danger we could be in, how would that be a bad thing?" I sighed, it felt like I was trying to convince myself of something instead of him. “I don't know. I'm just worried that whatever… whatever they were scared of is… is now in here, with us. What does that mean?"
Finally, I looked back towards Leo, only to see that he had placed his head upon the ground, his gaze off towards the exit. He was sad. “I… I'm not saying that your… uh… but- Fuck, I'm not good at this."
Leo looked at me, a look I knew well, one of pain. One where if he could speak he'd probably crack a joke to take the attention away from himself. There was probably so much he wanted to say, so many things he'd want me to know, but all of this had happened. “I just, I want to know what… I… I don't know."
My confliction must have cracked through, as Leo looked at me with worry once again. “I- I'm sorry, Leo, I love you so much but I… I don't know how this is going to work!"
Leo gave a gurgling sigh and nodded, he understood.
“I just… I ask these questions, and I know… I know you want to answer them but… You really can't and I…" My emotions were breaking as a tear ran down my cheek. “I really just wish I could hear your voice again."
That one hurt him, I didn't need to be an expert in alien body language to figure that one out. He recoiled and drifted his head away. “But I- I don't mean that I don't still love you! I'm so happy you're here, and I couldn't ever imagine living without you but I…"
"Your words just calmed me down is all, I… We'll find something else out, right?" My words echoed through the cave, this was a plea to myself, not to him and I knew it. All of those moments where I came home tired or hurting and he was more than happy to sit there and listen, and tell me it was okay and that he loved me… and that was gone now. "Right, Leo?"
Leo stared off into the darkness of the cave. I really didn't know what to do, normally I'd hug him and run my hand down his back but… His large form, lying heavily upon the ground, coiled around me to his head, which all sat many, many feet taller than me was not something that I had experience with. I stood up, one of his back eyes snapped to me, its large square pupil tracking me as I took hesitant steps forward. “I'm sorry, Leo, I… I didn't mean to hurt you, I love you."
I felt fear start to creep into my system, that alien eye watching me felt impossibly large and monolithic in the low light. I took a couple steps back, looking up towards the large head that towered a few feet above me. “Leo?"
He hadn't looked away, I couldn't figure out what was happening. I didn't know if he was hurting or if… or if something was happening. The agent's words echoed through my mind, even the slightest reminder that even still they may have been right. Maybe I just needed to piss him off to the point where it broke him and all that feral anger that they spoke of would just come out and kill me before I could think and…
He started to shake. I didn't know what that meant. I still had no idea what to do, what to say, what to feel. Was he getting ready to do something, should I be preparing for something? His mouth opened slowly, I could see his tongue running along the inside of his mouth as he closed his eyes, still shaking so heavily. The muscles in his throat clenched tightly, what was he doing? “Leo, are you okay? Do… Do you need me too-?" I began.
A grumbling growl of a tone lowed from his mouth, I immediately flinched, now extremely anxious. Stuck in a room with a creature multiple times my size with no idea what was going on. Then the tone stopped, and started again, and then again. My eyes darted over his form, trying to figure out what was happening, but those growls just started over and over, until…
"I…" Another sound came from Leo, though this one was familiar in a more 'human' way, was he… was he trying to speak? The sound was deep, rough and gravely, and far more like a lion's roar than a voice ever could be.
“Leo you- you don't need to hurt yourself, I'm… I'm okay! really!" I was full on panicking now, there was no precedent for what was happening here.
“I… loo…" Leo growled. He didn't have lips like me, or really anything that seemed to help him speak. It… sort of sounded like a dog, though just like a dog I had no idea what he was trying to say. “I… Loo… yoo…"
“Leo? Are you-?" I began but quickly stopped as I realized what he was saying. “Leo?"
Leo opened his eyes and slowly turned towards me, he wasn't smiling, and he wasn't frowning, he was just intently focused on what he was trying to do. He pressed his eyes closed tight once again. “I… loo… yoo. I loo you."