The finale.
#4 of Just high school life.
Been away for a long time. Here is the finale, to the tale that is Toby and Ricky.
I looked at the dance floor with a large frown. "No way." I said. Toby would never get me out on a dance floor, and neither would Be.
"Aww, comeon sweety." Be says, reaching for my hand. After the large earthquake in Europe, Toby signed up to help clean up. "Like travelling abroad, or something" He said after he had done it... Really though, I think he just did it to get some time alone.
Don't ask how I got here, with Be, the only person I know that Tobias truly loathes.
He takes my arm anyways and drags me to the dance floor, pressing his body against mine. "You don't have to dance, hunny. Let me do all the work...."
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I run, that's where I do my best thinking, and I really, really need to think right now... now where is-
"Hey running mate!" I hear Josh say behind me. I don't have to slow down, he is a cheetah, he will catch up to me.
"Hey Josh..." He know's I'm sad, and he knows what I am thinking about. I love Toby, I really do. But something about Be excites me.
"The sexy fox... choose the sexy fox!" I hear Josh say, and I shake my head. "Yeah... But, how do I know if that's right... I mean, what if, like, Be is right, and it IS fate that we met."
"Of course he said that, you idiot! He wants you to choose him!" I feel a tap on my shoulders and I stop running. I don't remember breathing this hard. "Do you know why Tobias left? Not just because he wanted to help with that relief work, but because he knew you were getting close to Be... He wanted to give you time to think, about what you really want." Josh turns to look at the road, he has the coolest Yellow eyes. "Has Be done anything to show you he genuinly loves you?"
Josh starts jogging again, and I just watch him run, deep in thought.
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I look down at ground, amazed how nice everything is from 1st class. Zori payed for mine, and my two friends return tickets, but he had to promise NOT to tell Ricky.
"You sure you'll be okay?" Mathew asked, sitting next to him was his boyfriend, Zack. Mathew was a corgi, with black and brown fur, and Zack was a LARGE Polar Bear. One chubby, one muscled, one small, one large, one white, one black. I thought it was AWESOME!
"Yeah." I say, thinking about it, how aweful it is. "You guys sure you are okay with going? I mean, not like you know him." Present tense, unnecesary, allwell.
"You're our friend, dude, of course we are going!" Zack says, one of the longest sentences I have heard from him.
I smile at them. We will land at the airport, I will take a shower at my house, change.
Then, it's off to my fathers funeral...
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"Hello?" My mother asks after a LONG silence on my end. Everything feels so surreal now.
"How did it happen?" I finally ask. If the phone had been alive, it would have said "I'm sorry for your loss, but can you QUITE CRUSHING ME!"
"I don't know... He was just going to clean the storm drains, and he was smiling and happy... and then when I went outside he was just lying there..." I hear the shakiness in my mothers voice, I feel the tears on my face. "I'm on my way home."
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I turn to Be and blush, standing infront of his apartment, alittle drunk. I laugh, for no real reason, and Be hugs me. I look him in the eyes, and before I know it, we are kissing.
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!" I look over, to see Zori, holding groceries and his keys.
"You aren't supposed to be home yet! You said you were going to be out all night with some friends!" Be cries out, I feel his paw on my groin.
I vomit.
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I look at my cell phone in shock. I got a text from Zori, who is quickly becomming one of my best friends, telling me that he found a certain Doberman and a certain Raccoon making out.
I should have known Be would be trying his best to get my love while I was away.
And I should have known that I would lose Ricky to someone I could never compete with.
I cry. Like the first time I told Ricky I loved him, I cry. I cry so hard, my mother hugs me tight. I cry so hard, Zack looks at my cellphone, and then hugs me, followed by Mathew.
There we are, huddled together, crying, looking over my father in his sunday clothes. Eyes closed forever.
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I sit on the bench, waiting. Toby told me to meet him here, and now...
GOD DAMNIT! What did I do! Why did I do it... I was more then alittle drunk. I was wasted... But still, I shouldn't have done it. I look up to see a Corgi looking at me. And then a Polar bear. I can kind of see Toby hiring them to beat me up. Wouldn't blame him.
But, I see him comming. "Sorry, I've been living with them since I got back, and they insisted they should come." Toby sits next to me, and I want to hug him so bad, but, I know it may be unwanted.
"I have to ask, why?"
The more I look at Toby, the more I think he looks like a mess. Tear stains on his fur, which looks unclean... He is prone to beating hisself up when he gets down, but not this bad.
"I... dunno... Be justs.... He excites me... I love you, Toby, I do... But I'm just confused, is all."
Toby stands, and I can tell he is about to cry. "Well, you just take more time... No... Ever since I first met you, I have waited for you, I loved you, and finally, I got you. If this little Raccoon thinks he can just take you, I will fight him... but... It's different if you love him back. Or if you even LIKE him."
Toby turns to look at me, and I can tell it's about to rain. "Remember, what I said three years ago? As long as you are happy, I'm happy, and as long as you are smiling, I'm happy. It kills me inside, but atleast you feel good."
I feel like a dagger stabs me in the stomach as I see a tear run down his cheek. "So, I'll go live my life, and you be happy with Be." That's all he says, and he leaves, the Bear and Corgi follow. I can't help it, I feel a tear fall down my face.
Then I hear a horn.
Then a loud thud.
And two people yell "TOBIAS!"
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"He wasn't looking where he was going!" Zach told me, after he told me his name. "He, like, was crying real hard, and just ran out into the road... you can't DO that around here!" I just sit, looking at the wall. Tobias' mom was in new york, I didn't know that, came to stay a week with her son and his friends, to "see the city." I hear her in the room now, talking to the docters. She is crying, yelling, asking them to save her son.
"I just lost my husband! I can't lose my only child too!"
My ears perl. What did she just say?
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I run, sprint, I see him there, on the ground, the corgi and bear are nealed beside him, and the car driver is in hysterics. "I didn't- didn't see him. I just looked down to change the station on my car and th-then.... I just..." I tune him out as I see Toby.
So still
So lifeless.
I don't even realize I am bent over, don't realize I am hugging him, crying, yelling at him to be okay. I don't even hear the sirens.
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Three days, I have sat in this room with him. I don't leave, I don't want to. Just me, Marissa, and Toby.
"He didn't want to tell you, because he said you had alot on your mind." She says, looking down. "He said, "If Rick loves me, then he shouldn't feel guilted into a decision," That's what he told me he said to that Lion friend of his."
I look over to Toby. Two broken ribs, a broken arm, possible head trauma, and possible hearing loss due to fluid flooding the ear canal.
Now I know why he looked so sad, so depressed. He lost his father, then had to put up with my BULLSHIT! I feel my fists clench, I am so angry at myself, and I keep getting texts from Be, texts I don't answer.
But still, I look up when I hear the knock on the door. I smell him before he even knocks though.
Be.
"I'll be right back." I stood and left the room, the raccoon looking right at me. I feel nothing for him. It really sinks in what Josh had said.
"So, what, you're just gonna ignore me?" Be asks, and I shake my head.
"I want you to leave me alone." I say, looking in his eyes.
"Look, I know, you feel guilty that that fox got ran over, but it isn't your fault." I hear it, above everything else. "THAT fox" Saying it as if Tobias wasn't a person, but a feral spider that needed to be stomped. Why didn't I listen to Toby when he told me that Be was a monster. I see it now, clear as day. He is vain, shallow, and only cares for me for my "hot bod" as Toby called it... Atleast Toby likes me for more, I think.
"That fox, has a name. It's Tobias. And I love him. I don't love you though. I thought you were cute... and, you just thought I was hot."
"But I love you." Be says, and I shake my head.
"It's not LOVE!" I say, alittle to loud. "I love Tobias...I really do.... And... I dunno what I was doing or thinking when I thought I felt something for you... Tobias is... is... my life... and you're not even important to me."
I know that I hurt him, but not hurt him because he likes me, but hurt him because I know he really is an ass. "If I leave, you will never get another CHANCE with me!" He yells, and I just shrug.
"Okay." I say, going back into room, locking it.
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I don't remember much about when I woke up, but I remember two people hugging me. At first, I think it's Zack and Mathew, so I just smile. "I should be more careful." I say to them, holding them close. "Damn right." I hear my mother say, and my eyes focus. My mom, and Ricky, my heart flutters, even if it still hurts. "Mom, I'm sorry... I didn't..." She shakes her head, and smiles. "My baby is going to be okay."
We talk, for alittle. I tell her the truth, I was crying, and couldn't really see, but I thought the road was clear. We talk about a few other things, and then she says she will get us all something to eat. Leaving me, and Ricky, alone.
"Tobias... I..." He moves his chair beside me, and holds my hand. I have to say, I still feel alittle out of it, but I don't fight him. It feels so nice, for him to touch my hand again.
"I love you... I do, with all my heart. And... I think I was afraid... You had it all figured out. Who you wanted to be with all your life... and I was... afraid." I look up to him and nod. I always got onehundreds in speech back in highschool. He barely passed... Just thought I should throw that in if you don't think this is terribly romantic.
"I was afraid to think about my furture, to think about what I want in life... I guess I just saw someone like me in Be... He didn't think about kind of stuff, the stuff that you do. He doesn't think about tommorrow, and I found comfort in that... But I love you Toby, and, I want a future with you." He holds my hand tight, I see tears in his eyes, and his fur looks ruffed up, and there are tear stains in his fur, like we had just changed places when it came to sorrows. "Please, give me another chance..."
"If you ever... EVER do this to me again, I will tie you to the bed so you will never see the light of day." I say, ears flicking as he hugs me, I light out a sharp groan of pain and he loosens up. "I love you Richard." I tell the doberman I would spend the rest of my life with.
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"And I love you, Tobias." I tell the Fox I love with all my heart.