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The New Lives of the Transformed

Part Two

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Written by Arian Mabe (Amethyst Mare)

Commissioned by Adagiodajiang

That first time set the tenor of his need, more and more thoughts of breeding mares, their solid shapes, the feel of them pressing back against him, entered his mind. Even as he settled in his stable or to graze in the field, he could not stop thoughts of them from entering his mind, cock dropping from his sheath softly, even when there was no way, at that point, that the horse felt that he could use it.

He ate like a horse and defecated like a horse, not even pausing to worry about dropping a load of horse apples in the field while there were other horses and people about. He had started off being one of only perhaps three horses there, that he knew of and could see daily, but the stables around him had slowly and surely filled up. More and more stable hands had appeared so that they could care for all the additional equines, cleaning up after them, moving them between stables and fields, all so that everyone had the company and space that they needed. Fresh hay was always supplied, along with a clean supply of water. For Starlight and the other horses there, life was good.

Starlight poked his head over the fence, curiously nudging at a chestnut horse who had appeared, even though his master was there. He usually wanted to go see his master, the one who held the most commanding hand over him as he was shown what they wanted of him from the ground, a kind of training…but a new horse overcame the urge for his master's hand.

The mayor watched, the new horse nickering and pushing gently back against Starlight, the two stallions friendly with one another. That was just how Saron wanted it to be, those under his command finding peace, though he still was not sure. It was wrong, in a way, to see someone who had been an anthro with a fully intelligent mind before defecating right in front of him, leaving Saron with a sense of unease in his stomach. It was like seeing something that would be voyeuristic in nature, turning his head away, lips a little twisted, pressed together too firmly to be comfortable for him.

“All dumb…unthinking… How is it for you, Joseph, to become this?"

Starlight only blinked back at him, a lack of intelligence in his dark eyes. He didn't know what the mayor wanted, only that he wanted to keep grazing. Turning away out of lack of interest, he braced his hind legs, rocking his body back, his shaft sliding out only enough so that he could urinate. The hot, rushing stream splattered down into the grass, soaked up by the earth underneath, his tail pushed back, even though a stallion did not very often splatter their own tail with the stream.

“You have changed here," the lord and his master told him, though the sound of his voice was funny, as if there was supposed to be something more there. “Don't tell Greyin, would you? I don't think he would handle this very well, seeing what has come of you…of one that he had personally captured."

Blinking and chewing grass, strands trailing from his lips, Starlight didn't have an answer for him, not understanding what was said. He didn't need to understand, not as his cock hung out, hardening, becoming firm enough for the stallion to absent-mindedly flex and jerk his shaft up against his underbelly again. It was something that he had learned after that first time that orgasm had been allowed to him, grunting softly, though he couldn't quite achieve orgasm that way. Either way, even if he didn't know that he was technically masturbating, it still felt good to him. For a horse, that was more than enough.

The king, however, was still learning what was enough for his transformed charges.

*

Three months later, Starlight was far from alone in the stables. The entire, large barn had been filled with horses, though he was not to know that every last one of them was once either an anthro or a human, all with varying levels of intelligence. The experiments were still going on with new subjects and old subjects, one after the other, Ramius, the lynx, organising everything. Her job had most certainly ramped up, giving her more to do than ever, even though she would have said very much too that she was the kind of feline who liked to be kept busy. She was not so sure, however, that she had signed up for quite that much work, however!

Starlight was interested in all of them, craning his head out over the stable door to watch the others, something in him pulling towards them. The horses stabled near him were all stallions, like him, but he could still smell the mares and even sometimes see them as they were led by his stable.

Were they for him? Were they all for him? He grunted and wobbled his lips, following the path of a beautiful black mare who was a couple of hands shorter than him at the withers. He wanted the mares, yes, very much, though he didn't understand why. His shaft was out, however, so it would not have taken all that much from his body to get there, to the point where instinct itself could take over, dictating the course and path of his thrusts.

It was good to have more horses around, though he had appreciated the little company that he'd had before. He had not been stabled with other horses close by before, even if he had been able to see others from the field, not realising just how much company he had needed to feel settled. They were like him, he sensed, even if he did not understand the reasoning behind it or what that meant. Yet there was still a sense of kinship there, a feeling that they were as they were meant to be and, finally, together.

“There you go, boy, out you go."

He was turned out with more and more horses in a herd while he was observed, though Starlight didn't care one bit about that. All that he cared about was the feeling of flying, hooves beating the earth, his proud, palomino neck pulled up high as his white mane flew like a flag straight out from the back of his neck. The earth compressed softly under his hooves, some of the looser clods thrown up behind him where there was less grass to bind it together, the wind caressing his golden coat, the embodiment of power and strength.

Yet Starlight did not know that. He was just a horse and he ran among his own kind, though, that time, there was only one mare in the field: a spotted horse with a white base coat and black spots. His head shot up higher, eyes wild, nostrils flaring. Wait – a mare? His body responded, his cock throbbing, pulsing, pushing instantly from its sheath as it dripped and drooled very faintly. His body was ready as he pranced and jogged on the spot, wanting her, her sweet, black spots surely calling his name.

He wanted her and yet things didn't seem to be working even as he braced her hind end for him, spreading her back legs, her tail lifted and shoved off to the side, the dock of her tail long enough to easily get it out of the way. Her sex was soft and pink with spots of grey, her skin pink under her white coat where it lacked pigment, though he didn't care about that, not caring about whether anyone was watching or not. All he had was need, a grunting force pulsing through him, her sex winking, dripping, encouraging him on so very readily.

Oof!

_ _

Starlight tried to mount her – oh, he did. But it just didn't work, not able to get the right angle, even though he was more than large enough that he should have been able to take her easily and mount her just right. It was hard for anyone for their first time and, as a horse, he was still technically a virgin in that body. A body could take on a new, second virginity after being transformed, though he tried and tried to mount her, over and over again, as if he was stuck in the moment, thrusting, pushing, his cock grinding over her rump and sliding off again.

“There, there, boy… Ramius says that you need a hand here… I guess…I can help you, boy, take care now."

He was loose, without a headcollar, though the stable hands that cared for him felt that they had more of a bond with him than they had earlier, weeks having passed: three months, in fact. It was time enough for them all to understand one another, in a human or anthro and horse relationship, of course, but not so that surprises could not occur.

Yet Sam was bold enough to come to help him, his hand under his belly, his other hand on Starlight's shoulder, guiding him into position. He had to be careful, of course, his blonde hair a little sticky with sweat, helping Starlight, guiding him, though he always made sure that he was in a safe position, where he could jump aside out of the way if something went wrong. He'd seen for himself just how quickly horses could kick and lash out and the heights of passion too were moments where the transformed horses could be especially unpredictable.

Yet everything came together as well as any of them could have wished, the spotted mare rocking back against him, her tail lifted, allowing his cock to be positioned at her folds. Her sex winked and pulled for Starlight, but the ranch hand was able to take hold of his cock and lift it at just the right moment for his cock to sink inside.

And all Starlight knew was pleasure. He could not remember the specific incident of his first time with the breeding device and Sam, the stable hand, back in the research room, but he knew that something had happened before and that that time with the mare was so much better. The stable hand rushed around them, ensuring that they were both head collared, though it had to be a slip-on halter for Starlight, tightened with a single rope so that it was snug around his face and over the bone of his nose. Ramius was there, at a distance, though Starlight was only very dimly aware of her, further back from the action, pleasure swamping him.

Oh, he had to keep thrusting, his lips flickering and twitching over the rope that bounced back and forth before him from the slip-on halter, the rope soft and moving with the swing of his body. But he thrust and thrust, losing himself in the moment, putting a little more weight on the mare's back than he would in future times, when he was more used to resting his weight on his back end as a breeding stallion.

Experience would tell, all coming in good time, moment by moment, breeding after breeding. Yet with so much pleasure overwhelming him, Starlight did not even know that he was being recorded, a handheld recording device in another stable hand's grasp, though a flying drone was hovering at a distance. His ears twitched at that, flight instinct making him want to run from it, even though breeding drive was greater.

It was good, chewing and licking at the air in a release of tension until his jaw was soft, his tongue moving easily in his mouth. No more did his cock just awkwardly poke at the mare's backside, but her folds took him easily, hugging the length of his cock as he sank into her, again and again, desire pumping through him, the beat of his heart pounding in his chest. He wanted to keep going, thrusting and thrusting, but something was growing, something building deep inside him, that told him that the end was close.

For there was no mindless horse in the world that mated for anything more than breeding lust. He had to breed, had to do more, had to see his foals running through the fields, to be a sire and spread his bloodlines far and wide. That was all that Starlight could think about as the lure of his pounding, pulsing orgasm swelled more and more, the urge to procreate overwhelming.

More mares…yes. Yes, that was what he needed. More and more mares, always more mares. There was something in him that clung onto that newfound urge, grunting, heaving, his flanks shuddering for breath. His lungs expanded as he snatched in as much air as he could, as if he was luxuriating in a flat-out gallop, stretching out his legs, covering the ground, stride after stride. Yet he was right there in the moment too, pounding her, thrusting, nipping and nibbling at the back of her neck, draped over her body as if they had made one shape and form.

That first time was what set the tone for every time that came afterwards, his grunting snorts blasting forth in a haze of hot breath. He couldn't help the push of his climax, balls aching and churning, feeling as if he could feel every last moment of his seed making its way up his nuts, throbbing down the full length of his cock, ejaculating rope after rope into her pussy. Her cunny closed around him, though her silken folds were just as the stallion needed them to be, stroking his cock wonderfully with every thrust.

She nickered, taking it all, her legs quivering a little, though the mare easily been able to take his weight. She lipped at the air, snorting and showing him the side view of her pretty little face, her tiny, petal-shaped ears twitching back and forth. Starlight hoped faintly that he would get to see her and mate with her again, though the stable hand had control over him, each of them on a headcollar. His hands trembled ever so faintly, but that was of no concern to Starlight as he shook his head, his crest wobbling back and forth in a thick swathe of fat and muscle from one side of his neck to the other.

He was powerful. He was strong. He was a stallion. Then more than any other time, he was comfortable in his own body, though he had never had the sense that he was in the wrong body or the wrong place. Starlight's cock fit perfectly inside her, as if they had always been meant to be together, though the stallion found himself loathe to draw out, even as the last spurts of stallion cream dripped into her.

“There, there, good boy…"

The mare could stay in the pasture, but he was to be led away as he dismounted, his cock half soft and slipping easily from her cunny. He snorted, shaking himself off, some loose hairs drifting away as he loosened them with the tremor of his body, though the mare dropped her head instantly, beginning, once more, to graze. To her, it was something perfectly normal and it was for him too – only that Starlight wanted to mount her all over again, taking her deeply all over again.

But it was all well and good, his cock remaining out, refusing to slip back into his sheath, so plump and full with the fatness of his cock. He wanted to do it again, turning his head and glancing back at the mare left grazing, her tail a little pushed to the side again, her folds a little creamy with his load. She didn't wink anymore, her body satisfied with what had taken place, though she would remain ready and in season until her body was ripe with foal. Only then would she chase away any stallions that were put in her field to mount her.

Starlight chewed at the lead rope, though that was to be the day that he was introduced to the bridle, a mere steed with a metal bit between his teeth, settling in the gap in them at the back of his mouth. He grunted and chewed at it, grinding briefly on the metal, but it was not all that uncomfortable, just one more thing that he was to get used to. What he did not know was that everything that had taken place out there in the field had been streamed, live, back to his master, not a single thrust of his body going unnoticed by the one who was in charge of his body, his mind, everything about him and more. He didn't know that he was all part of the greater plan, working towards the greater good under the king's rule, but he didn't have to know, not when he was “just the horse".

He might have needed the help of the stable hand that time, but he would not in the future. Soon, he would have bred and mated with so many mares that he would never consider himself unskilled at all, if his mind had been at the level to form that manner of thought. He would find it easy to press into them, to give them all the instinctual breeding pleasure that he wanted to deliver, conceiving more and more foals, time after time again.

Starlight nickered, stretching his neck out, lipping at his haynet as he was tucked back away in his stable.

Life was good as a horse. He didn't know how he could have possibly wanted anything more.

Not ever.

*

Starlight shook his head, lingering in the stable rather than going out into his pen. His hay was particularly sweet that day and he didn't want to head out into the warmer air, for there were more flies out there after the rain. His body was softly relaxed after his mating, his cock half hanging out as if he didn't have the energy to retract it, even though he was perfectly comfortable right where he was. It was simply a gesture of relaxation when it came to being a stallion, something that he was growing more and more comfortable with. He couldn't imagine a time where that would not have been comfortable for him to do, yet there was a lingering sense, like something that he could not remember. Yet what did a stallion have to worry about remembering anything when he relied so much on instinct? It was always there for him, after all.

Yet something was changing, all without his consent. His mind was there, active, things appearing a little clearer around him, as if he was seeing them through different eyes and a different mindset. The stallion snorted uneasily, taking a step back, swinging his head from side to side as he studied the walls of his stable.

What was…that? Where was…he? Was he still a he? There was something different, something wrong, the stallion wobbly on his hooves, turning in a circle, though his movements as a non-anthro equine no longer came as easily to him. He just wanted to be comfortable in his position and there no longer seemed to be any way that he could stand or lie that settled the churning, gnawing sense of unease in his gut. His belly grumbled, though he was not hungry, his normal gut noises elevated, tail swishing back and forth.

For, slowly but surely, he was being “woken up" again, his mind returning to its normal, fully intelligent capacity, even though no one would have honestly said that Joseph, as he'd been before becoming Starlight, had been especially intelligent. What he did not know was that his mind was being awoken once more from a distance, Ramius remotely adjusting his intelligence meter so that he could think, remembering all that had happened to him, everything – even how he'd ended up there.

Joseph gasped, no longer thinking of himself as Starlight, snorting, lips working, though all that came from his trembling nostrils was a shrill kind of whinny.

“What's wrong with me?"

At least, that was what he tried to say, turning, finding himself, feeling out the nuances and muscles and nerves in his “new body", as much as he reeled from the realisation of it. He was a horse! Well, no… Yes… He'd always been a horse, of course, but an anthro horse, not a feral one, not one with four legs. His new body felt natural, however, his mind pulling up the image of being on two legs but not leaning into it all that heavily, as if it was an afterimage of a time gone by. It could have been no more than an imprint on the inside of his lowered eyelids, like what remained after one glanced at the sun and saw “spots" afterwards, floating and drifting across their line of vision.

He tried to talk again, working his lips, though there was the capability of speech there, even if it took him a short while to work out how he was supposed to do it, use his new voice box. That calmed Joseph a little, even as the stallion wrinkled his nose at the name that tried to supersede it: Starlight. Starlight. That was a horse's name, a dumb horse's name, though it was not entirely unappealing to the ear.

Balanced carefully on all four legs, though he had less to worry about there than he realised, he snorted, working the word carefully around his mouth, tongue thick and heavy between his herbivorous teeth.

“Star… Star… Star… Star…light. Starlight."

Yes, that was him, a better way of being than simply Joseph. He was not panicked, not all that much, the shock settling quickly to the rhythm of his body and the swish of his tail, as if there was something, deep down inside him, that knew there was nothing, not truly, to be afraid of there. He remembered false memories, of suckling from “his dam", but they were not real, even though they felt real, at least then. The memories of a horse, before his crude, abrupt transformation at the hands of the young lord that everyone revered, had been planted in his mind, yet they still felt as real to him as the memory of being held by his mother when he was a toddler. That was one of his earliest memories and it soothed him a little more to think of it, how her hands had felt stroking down his back, easing over his short coat of hair.

He lowered his head, feeling every section of his body, how the skin pulled and twitched over his flesh, how he was in control of even that. He felt every breath expand his ribcage and letting it settle, repeatedly, needing fewer breaths than he had as an anthro every minute to satisfy his need for oxygen, at least when he was at rest. The day had moved into the afternoon before him and he snorted, pushing his nose towards fresh air, nostrils twitching and flaring, a touch of moisture inside trickling, itching.

It was strange…but the right kind of strange, even if that didn't make sense, not even to Joseph. But should he call himself Joseph or Starlight? The horse's mind called him, dull and slow, calm and peaceful, chewing grass fresh with morning due. Yes, that was right: he was Starlight and it was okay that he wanted to keep that name. A name, after all, would always remain his choice, regardless of whatever else happened to him, when tucked up in the sanctuary of his mind.

At least, that was what Starlight thought. He didn't honestly know whether even that could be taken from him, but it was what he would believe until proven otherwise.

He flicked his tail back and forth, controlling the swish, the long dock stretching down further into the bulk of hair there than it had as an anthro. That was new too, though he liked it, breathing softly and evenly, turning to itch at a spot behind his armpit with his teeth. His teeth and lips took care of the itch easily, though it was a marvel to Starlight too, settled in his body and yet stood back from it too at the same time, that he was able to react so instinctively.

Maybe such a thing was the simpler kind of life that he had been seeking out all along?

Poking his head outside, he cautiously strode outside, wondering if he should try to appear as if he didn't have any other thoughts in his head at all, though there was something in him that suspected that was a moot point. Such things didn't happen for no reason, but Starlight didn't think that he'd ever been one to control things like that. He had a blind spot right in front of his nose that he had not had as an anthro, his eyes having shifted to a true feral positioning on either side of his head, giving him excellent peripheral vision. He could even see almost all the way behind him, the blind spot there minimal, giving him the best chance of evading prospective manners. Yet there was a sense of ease about him, cool air washing over his body, his sheath…strangely wet.

Starlight shivered. Ah, yes, that was right… He remembered that, but it was not what his mind had initially jumped to after waking up. He had only just mated and, well…that had been a good thing. A very strangely good thing that had him grunting softly and puffing, remembering the mare all over again.

Some part of his mind told him that he should have felt repulsed, that he should have felt sick, and yet…he was aroused. There was no other way to put it, the warm crawling deliciously through his body to his crotch, how he wanted to instinctively puff up his chest, arch his neck and prance, showing off for the mare that could not have been all that far away. The mating, in actuality, had been quite brief, but the sensations and memory of it had built up in his mind to such a point that the stallion was left with a wealth of information to draw on, not only from sight but from smell, sound, feel and even taste too.

Starlight bobbed his head, licking his lips, his jaw loose and relaxed. It was better, in a big way, than having sex with his partner, with Symone. Oh, he loved the mare, dearly, but just how could having sex on a mattress ever compare with mating on cool grass, hooves stomping, lusts, quite literally, flaring?

He turned again, cock half slipped out, though it only bobbed and swayed back and forth, not honestly becoming ready to mate at that moment. What was he doing there? The pen was fine and so was the stable, but he was used to being out in the field at that time. It was too small for him to be in for a long time without turnout, as was the case, pretty much, with any stable. They were grazing animals, after all, designed to move. He tossed his head eagerly, craning it back and forth for the stable hand who was surely destined to feed him that day. Where was he?

His thoughts, without actively considering it, had easily slipped back to equine pursuits, leaving his anthro, intelligent mind behind. It was easier that way, simpler that way, yet it all came naturally to him while his stomach ached with hunger. Maybe he should not have slept after mating, for it had left him with an empty stomach and all his hay was gone. That was a shame…especially when he would have liked it to be topped up.

For the first time, with his intelligence restored, he pawed at the dirt of the pen, bored. That was unusual for, if he had been in a dull horse's mind, lowered intelligence, he would have simply rested or gone to sleep. Boredom, in that sense, was not present in a horse's mind. Maybe if he was asked to do something repetitive or work for a long time, but not when he was left to his own devices, when he had company at the very least. He shivered. He didn't like that change back in his brain, not one bit.

His throat tightened, closing, feeling as if it was rippling, though there was no pain there. His ability to speak returned and the horse laughed to himself, however hoarsely, out loud. He hadn't said anything before at all, but had been grunting and nickering while his ears had picked out him trying to say his name, Starlight. How funny!

“I see you are doing well."

That was the lynx, Ramius, he remembered, locking her name into his memory the best he could. He didn't yet know whether he wanted to be one way or the other, his mind confused with emotions, what had felt good and what…distinctly did not feel good.

“Your vocal cords have been adjusted now," she said, gentleness rising in her tone. “Try to speak."

He fumbled, working his lips, his tongue thick and heavy in his mouth.

“Unff… Eeee… I… I…caaaaan…talkkk….talk. Icantalk."

He grimaced, tossing his head, but the lynx only held up her hand to stay him, not needing to be loud with him.

“Don't worry, it will get easier. There's no need to stress about it… Joseph!"

But the stallion had already whirled about in discontent, teeth bared, showing his anger in the only way allowed to him as a horse. He wanted to speak! He had been just fine when he had thought that he was speaking! Whipping around, he spun and slammed his hind hooves into the wooden boards penning him in, grunting, screaming a stallion's scream. That, more than anything else, had become more his words in the expression of fury than anything else ever could have.

To his surprise, however, Ramius laughed and leaned on his door, crossing her arms as she leaned over the half stable door to watch him.

“My, my, my… It's been a while since I've seen one with such spirit… But you really shouldn't bash up the walls, we might have to move you to a smaller stable while we repair it. We won't even give you a nice pair of shoes to trot about in if you treat our property like that. Look how well we take care of you, Joseph. Don't you think you should behave a little better than that?"

The stallion snorted and whipped his head up, eyeing up the small monitor that the lynx held with a roll of his eyes. He had to tilt and thrust his head in to see it, though the shape of him could be distinguished on the screen, as if he had been filmed for a whole day, showing him going through his daily life, how they had cleaned him, groomed him, made sure that even his sheath and the space under his tail had been clean. Starlight pulled back from seeing himself defecate and urinate so publicly, but it was normal too, not something that he had to be ashamed of, not when everyone there and beyond saw him as nothing more than a non-anthro horse.

Was that such a bad thing?

He snorted, puffing, angling his head for a better view as the video gave a close-up shot of the horse's penis being grabbed, out in the field, positioned at the mare's folds for that first, sweet thrust, what had definitely been his first mating as a feral equine. Against himself, the stallion groaned.

“There now… You see, don't you?"

The shame that should have built at having everything recorded and documented…somehow did not come. He shook his head, mane flipping from one side of his neck to the other, but he did not understand why the burning heat of it did not flood his body, prickling uncomfortably through his hide. Maybe it was the body he was in? Yet he could feel it, he knew, as he was in his “right mind", so to speak, shifting his weight, waiting for something that simply was not going to come.

“I…not…" He struggled to get words out, though stringing sentences together came a little more easily than before. “Not…livestock. Don't treat…me…like that. I am a horse. I have…me…personality inside."

“Of course, we know that," Ramius said soothingly, the lynx laying a hand on his neck, though Starlight shifted his weight from it without moving his hooves. “Put it this way, Joseph. You did, what, practically minimum wage work at odd hours before to keep a roof over your head? Our records don't even show that you had a home of your own. No power, always answering up to “the man" … How did you even like that life of yours before?"

Starlight shook his head. That was not a time that he wanted to return to, stomach curdling in unease, yet Ramius pressed on.

“Think of it. I know, it's hard. But you know what our medical system is like here – anyone in your family got sick and, bam, that was it. Have fun paying those bills off! We have no insurance records for you… Not on anything, in fact…which says that you couldn't afford it. When your family grows older, they will need more care than you can give them and then where do you think you'd be? That's no life for anyone and that is what the mayor is trying to change in this world."

Starlight hesitated. All he had heard before was how bad the “king" was, the mayor, the man that he had been sent to assassinate. He never knew as much about his targets as he had uncovered about that mayor, but he had thought, even then, that he was doing the right thing. Yet he had seen something different in his master's eyes than the lost sickness of an evil dictator when he had come to see him, when he had laid his hand on his neck as if Starlight was the most important thing in the world to him.

Which was true? Which was false? Who was to know?

His life there, to be fair…was very much better than before, the simplicity of it leading him to the sweetness of a watering hole where he could drink and drink and drink, all to his heart's content. He had wanted that, he knew, but he wasn't asked to do any work out there, left to go and do what he wanted in the field, without any worry about who was looking at him or if he was performing correctly. He had never liked being in charge all that much of his small team, disliking the responsibility, how he felt that Kevin and Raymond were his responsibility, if anything happened to him or if they did anything untoward too.

“Was that the life that you wanted, Joseph."

Starlight, he wanted to tell her. His name was Starlight. Yet he couldn't quite get the word from his lips, for maybe that in itself would have sealed the deal, made it permanent. Yet the mating… He only wished that that could have been longer, though, in the moment with a pure horse brain and no more than that, he had felt as if he was galloping on air, his body as light as a feather. Maybe he could have even spread a pair of pegasus wings and soared to the heavens with her!

Not waiting for him to speak as the silence stretched out between them, the lynx took charge.

“My boss can guarantee the quality of your life, Joseph, make it so that you never have to work, or feel like you are working, another day in your life. Isn't that something that you'd want? We've recorded your brain waves and deciphered your thoughts, technology these days is quite remarkable, if you didn't know that already… You enjoy this lifestyle very much…don't you?"

It was a question, but not a question at the same time, for Ramius already knew the answer.

Starlight chewed the air, jaw moving, the looseness of his tongue helping him release a tiny bit of tension. He couldn't help but be impressed, ever so slightly. Yes… Yes, that was all true, even if he didn't want to say it all out loud. He liked walking in the pasture, feeling the warm glow of the sun on his hide, the grass indenting under his bare hooves. The time was slow there, when his head was down eating grass or standing still, enjoying the peace of the day in restful silence, but it was easier when he did not have to think too much. When he was in a slower pace of mind, part of his intelligence lost, he liked the feeling, how there were few constraints as to how he spent his day.

Yet that did not mean that he didn't have concerns about his existence there.

“This…isn't right though," Starlight tried, speaking slowly, considering his words and how easy they were to say. “I can't experience things properly as a horse…in that mind. And not in my full mind either. It doesn't feel right being fully me, as I was…or being fully horse, just a stupid horse!"

The anger conflicted with the peace that he wanted, but Starlight didn't know how to find the middle ground, shaking his head in fury.

“I don't want flashbacks of memories, thoughts that don't feel like they are mine… I want to be alive! Really alive!"

The lynx, however, knew that he would be okay, making a note of everything. What she did not impart to Starlight was that everything could be amended, all to his liking. The mayor had taken a keen interest in the mental wellbeing of his subjects, after all.

“Don't worry about it, Joseph, this is all good information for me. Let it sit with me for a while, it will all work out nicely. That said, I think it is time for a physical exam, now that you can feed back to me if there is anything more that we should be paying note to in this form of yours."

Starlight grunted, but Ramius did wait, slipping a headcollar over his nose and buckling it at his cheekbone. It felt comfortable on his face and his training jerked him into forward motion, following the tug of the lead rope.

It was easy to allow himself to be led out of the stable, down to the crossties at the end of the barn, though he noted that he did not need to go to the more clinical examination room that time. It was there that her hands moved over his body skilfully, checking out every last part of him, using a measuring stick for his height to his withers, checking inside his ears for any lumps, measuring his girth with something that looked like a tape measure.

It was not too intrusive, but it was nice, in a way, to be touched and stroked, his lower lip drooping as his head lowered bit by bit.

“There you go, boy, just relax now."

His tail was bandaged skilfully, not wrapped too tightly around the dock, though he was comfortable with being handled in that way. It did not feel like something that he would grow bored in, not when something was going on, enjoying the moment, the quiet relaxation of it.

But it was not relaxing when a thermometer was pushed into his tail hole, the lynx warning him but he had not been paying enough attention, his tail shooting him, a hind hoof raised warningly from the ground.

“Watch it!"

“There, there, easy now, this is all…all very normal!"

Ramius struggled, staying to the side, for the horse had not yet learned to cow kick when he had to think about it. The lynx just about managed to keep the thermometer in place for long enough for his anal temperature to be taken, though his huge pucker made it an easy target at the very least. The horse would have blushed if he'd been able to, trembling in place, the researcher stepping back and sliding the thermometer back out, taking the reading.

“There, Joseph, that wasn't that bad. We have to make sure we take your vitals to check your health, especially when you're not able to talk to us to tell us how you're feeling."

The horse stepped back, but the crossties kept him in place. His mind cast about, wanting his tail clamped down again, even though the violation had brought him back to the stark reality that he was in a horse's body, no more than that. No one cared for what he had to say or what he wanted to do otherwise and, perhaps, that was the way it was meant to be. At least people were clear about it when he was in a non-anthro body. They didn't expect anything else from him.

“So…" He tried to change the topic, for that, at least, seemed a little easier than pushing things too much with the physical side. “How… How do you change my head? My mind? How can I think now, like an anthro, not like just a horse?"

His words may have been clumsy, but Ramius understood, all the same, what he wanted. She would not have expected anything less from him, for everything in her records showed that he was an intelligent soul…when he tapped into that part of his mind, that was. It was not a part of his psyche that the horse had used all that much in his life, though that was perhaps telling of how well he had leaned into a simpler way of life and being as a horse. Yet that was not easy for him to accept as he was, his mind pinging from one extreme to the other, ears twitching back and forth to catch every sound.

“Here, let me show you."

She brought her handheld monitor to him, for it was easier than showing him the intricacies from a big screen: that room was not suitable for things like bringing full-sized non-anthro horses inside.

“Now, if you look here, this is your profile."

Huh. A profile. As if he was just another user of an app, anyone else, a normal person. The lynx's claws tapped the screen lightly, though they were more like nails, if a little narrower to show her feline heritage. The horse resisted the urge to snort, for that had the added effect of spraying mucus, as natural as it was, before him.

“When I turn this dial on the screen, it controls your intelligence. Once everything is set up via neurotransmitters, all of which are implanted into your brain quite safely and moving through your body via your bloodstream, it is all quite simple. We can show you that process another time, perhaps, as we have some…subjects who might be willing to allow you to watch."

That was not a promise that Ramius could make, though her eagerness for science shone through above all else. As the horse studied the tablet curiously, she turned the dial on the touch screen down and down and down. At the base was the level of intelligence that a non-anthro equine would have, though his mind, of course, would all remain intact inside.

Starlight blinked, his breathing softening, chewing lightly and angling his head. His neck itched and, without thinking about it, he leaned over to itch it on the frame of a stable door, snorting softly. Ah, yes, that was better, that felt better. And better was all that he had to think about, the lynx before him doing something with him, though he didn't know what.

Yet it was not to remain like that as the lynx asked him a question, her voice rising in pitch at the end, though that did not mean that Starlight understood. Her fingers moved, once again, on the tablet, and he blinked, his mind feeling as if it was vibrating, a strange sense of “shifting" pushing through him.

“Joseph? Nod if you can understand this."

He blinked. The words were there, yes…but he couldn't make sense of them. It was as if he was drunk, in a way, but without the slurring and slow movement, present in his body and yet lacking in comprehension. The lynx shook her head, fiddling with the tablet again.

Ah. That was better, though he didn't quite understand what was “better". As he blinked and shook himself off from invisible annoyances, Starlight's mind returned to him almost in a rush of clarity. He gasped, nostrils fluttering, tail flicking up, but panting through his nostrils feeling every nuance of his body in stark detail. Even his vocal cords had been restored, though he was left with the funny sense that they had been severed only moments before.

“Whoa…" He muttered. “That is very strange."

“I'm going to ask you some questions, Starlight, then adjust it down so you can see how it works. What is your name?"

“My name is Starlight."

She raised an eyebrow at that, but did not comment.

“How old are you?"

“Twenty…five."

That was wrong, but close enough for her to move on, slowly adjusting the dial down a little more with every question.

“How did you get here?"

“A…truck."

A trailer, but he couldn't be expected to know that.

“Who is the mayor?"

“Ma…Master."

Starlight's intelligent mind slipped from him more and more, his tongue thick and heavy in his mouth, though he could not focus anymore, losing interest in the words that the lynx had to say.

“What do you like to eat?"

Starlight blinked, words lost to him. He nickered, pawing at the ground, knowing that he wanted to “say" something, but lacking the ability to do so.

“Where do you get water?"

He knew that word…but he couldn't, shaking his head, chewing at the air, eyes soft and calm. It was of no matter to him.

“There you go, Joseph. See how it's different? I'll bring you back up a little now, just so you can understand me."

With his intelligence back up to roughly seventy per cent of his usual, natural ability, Starlight snorted and took a step back, tugging at the crossties.

“Whoa… That's… Yeah…" He couldn't get the words out, but not because he could not but because it was a struggle to find them in the sanctity of his mind. “Yeah… I think I'll stay at one level, thanks, for now. I don't want to go back and forth. And…you're right. The life I had before was not for me. I don't need to go back to it."

Ramius studied him.

“So, you will continue with the experiment and training?"

Starlight nodded, taking a deep, steadying breath, sides expanding with air.

“Yes… If you don't hurt me, no one is to hurt me, I'm willing to try."

The lynx grinned, showing a few too many teeth than the horse was comfortable with.

“Oh, Joseph, you're a good horse, so don't worry your pretty little head one bit more about us hurting you. That will not happen. Now that we have your agreement on this, we shall recommence our communication with you in one year."

The horse started, head jerking back, only drawn up short by the crossties.

“Wait – what? No! That's too lonnnnnn…"

But he never got to finish his utterance as speech was stripped from him, becoming a dumb horse again. As with the rest of him, his mind would not be harmed during it, his head a little lower, breathing a little more slowly and evenly, for the horse in him did not see any reason at all to be concerned about what was going on.

He was in the stables. There were no threats there. He was safe. That was all Starlight needed to know.

Oh. A feed bucket? He stretched down to it, not having noticed it was there before, his stomach a little too empty, raw and hungry. Yes, yes… That was good, very good, chaff filling his mouth, chewing slowly, enjoying the taste of it, mixed in with oats and grain.

The world was good, the anthro lynx scratching his withers gently to relax him further. Life was good, all right where he was.

And Starlight didn't have to worry about anything.