FSE

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The Hooded Hare was doing a good trade, the bar crowded with furs chatting over drinks and just generally having a good time. And usually Ari would have been in the centre of that. But not this time. Today the vixen was seated down the other end of the bar, keeping to herself. To be honest she didn't feel like company right now. At least not from anyone here. Even if that company would have helped distract her from the thoughts that kept running through her head. Not that anything seemed to help. Not after she had been so stupid. Fighting down the urge to scream at herself that more came from her own frustration rather than the booze in her system, Ari finished her drink in one quick slug.

'Really packing those away aren't ya?' Daria's voice intruded on her thoughts suddenly. Prompting Ari to raise her head sluggishly.

'Wouldn't think you'd mind.' Ari cringed inwardly at the slur in her voice, even as she waved her glass at the lithe Coyote standing before her.

'So business is booming.' Daria flicked her hair behind her ear. 'Doesn't mean I can't see something is bothering you. So, what's on your mind? Did Summer do something?'

Somehow that hurt more, the way she was standing up for her and taking her side just made her feel worse. 'No. I did something.' Ari sighed, her shoulders sagging. 'Something really stupid.'

She pulled out the chair she kept behind the bar, taking the empty glass from her paw. 'So, how bad can it be?'

'Bad.' She sighed, she couldn't hide from it now. 'I kissed her. I didn't mean too, didn't plan it. It just happened.' That was the worst bit. That split second mistake she couldn't take back. And could have ruined everything.

'And?' She sat back thoughtfully. 'What did she say?'

Ari hung her head. 'I don't know. I didn't give her the chance to say anything. I just ran.' She waited for her friend to slate her for being a coward. Heaven knows she deserved it.

'So, you don't know what she thought?' Daria asked.

'What else could she think? I'm sure she hates me.' She reached for the glass again. 'So I might as well stay here.

'I think you've had enough.' Daria placed it on the far side of the bar with a firm clink. 'You need to stop hiding here and go talk to her. I'm not going to stand here while you drown your sorrows.'

'You aren't standing. You are sitting.' Ari giggled, only partially forcing that answer.

'Smart ass.' Daria swatted her arm lightly. 'Go and talk to her. This might not be as big as you think it is. Either way, you can't keep hiding here forever.'

---

'I'm sure she is hiding from me.' That was as far as Summer had gotten writing in her journal, those few words scrawled at the top of the page. She had hoped that getting down what she felt on paper might help sort out the confusion in her head. Instead she was just staring at the nearly blank page, her mind running around the same thoughts that had plagued her very fitful night's sleep. Thoughts that all started with that kiss. That surprising and sudden kiss. A kiss she had no idea what it even meant since Ari had just left her standing there on her doorstep with what felt like a million questions. Had she meant anything by the kiss? That was the big one? Not as big as if she liked it. But she hadn't been able to think on that? No, if she was here right now, she would ask her not if she meant it. But how she meant it. It was all too easy to see it as a romantic kiss. Even if she didn't know what to make of that. But what kind of romantic? What did it mean? That she was just looking for a little fun? Or that she wanted, expected something more from her? That was the bit that really left her lost. She had no idea how to respond to that. And not just because she was a woman, even if that raised its own questions. But because she might be expecting something from her that she couldn't return. What if she had felt that? Had sensed something from her? What if that was the reason she ran? What if....

Summer snapped her journal shut. She was doing no good sitting around here stewing. She had to get out and do something. It took her no time at all to change into something light and loose, not bothering with underwear. It always matted her fur when she ran. She wasn't going to be out long anyway.

Outside, Summer quickly settled into her usual routine, letting her legs carry her on instinct around the path she normally took. But she didn't want to think, so she pushed herself harder and faster than she normally would. Sadly, she was more focused on that than where she was going. She wasn't really sure who hit who but one second she rounded the barracks barely with enough time to notice the figure coming the other way before the impact sent her staggering backwards.

She wasn't sure who recognised who first, but it was Ari who reacted first. Turning before Summer could make it back to her feet. 'Ari, wait. Please. Can we talk?'

Summer tried to ignore the embarrassment of standing before her in only a sweatshirt and pants, her lack of underwear feeling obvious for all to see. She didn't reply to her question, her mind already racing a hundred miles an hour, which might have been why she blurted out the first thing that came into her head. 'I'm sorry if I did something wrong. I didn't mean to hurt you."

'What?' Ari sounded more confused than upset. But at least she was talking to her. That had to be something. 'No, you didn't. If anything I'm the one who did something wrong. Not you. I just...got carried away. I can understand if you don't want to see me again.'

Now it was Summer's turn to sound confused. 'Who said I didn't?' She replied softly. 'I'd hate for this to ruin what we had. What we have.' Even if she didn't understand what exactly that was yet.

'You mean that?' Ari said, relief clear in her voice. 'Do you have some free time this weekend? I was going to do some shopping. You could come with me. If you'd like.'

Somehow Summer got the feeling she didn't mean shopping for food. Suddenly she was into something out of her comfort zone. She didn't want to say no but was unsure about how to say yes. 'Well...sure. I'm not much of a shopper though.'

'Even better. I can show you all the cool stores. Maybe even dig out a few bargains. I'm good at that.'

---

Summer tried not to feel self-conscious as she waited for Ari. Something that was easier said than done. She was completely out of her comfort zone here. And not just because this was an area of town she didn't know. That she could have gotten used to. It was the shops around her. Fashionable shops full of named brands and clothing labels she had never heard of, never mind even thought about buying. All that newness left her helplessly lost. And hoping that Ari would get here soon. Yes, she wanted to see her again. But she also was counting on her to help her through this. It wasn't surprising she found this all so new. She had never had a friendship like this before. Had never even thought about having one. So why now was she so desperate not to lose it?

Her mind went further back. How might her schooling days have been if she had just opened up? Oh sure. It was easy enough to blame that on the people she knew. But part of it was on her. If she had been a little more outgoing and confidant she could have actually got to know some of them. Even let her get to know her. But the longer she had held back the easier it had become to keep doing that.

Her self-consciousness had been growing as she had been thinking. Even her choice of outfit was pretty plain. Faded blue sweatshirt with the hood bunched around her neck, the frayed hem leaving no gap between it and her trousers. Which were just as plain, even with the row of tarnished studs around the pockets, the darkened metal really the only embellishment on the comfortable jeans she had chosen. Pretty pathetic for an hour of flicking through her wardrobe. But that was what she was used to wearing. It had always done well enough for her. She could only imagine what Ari would turn up wearing. Probably the very opposite of her.

Then she didn't have to wonder. Ari had outdone her without even seeming to try; the silk shirt she wore unbuttoned at the collar just screamed effortless self confidence in herself. As did the black mini skirt that hugged her hips just tightly enough, leaving her long legs bared to the air, even down to her feet covered only by a pair of elegant black sandals.

'Wow. You look amazing.' Summer blurted out, mostly just to have something to say. It was down to her nerves, she knew that. And now her nerves were running away from her, fuelling her mouth to avoid any awkward silence. 'I hope you can help me find something like that. Sorry. I'm goddess, that was so forward of me. I'm sorry. I'm not used to this.' Summer finished, feeling her cheeks burn and her stomach squirm.

'Easy, girl. Breath.' Ari chuckled softly. 'You'll do fine. Just follow my lead.' She took her arm in hers.

That was easier said than done. Summer's worst fears were realised. Right from the first second she stepped into the shop, she was lost; surrounded by clothes she would never have thought of buying in a million years, would never have even thought she could wear, would like right in. She had no idea where to even start, bamboozled by the choice. Luckily Ari knew where to go.

At least she was leading her past the dresses and skirts towards the racks of tops and t-shirts at the back of the store. Summer let out a relieved breath silently. This was safer territory at least. Over the next hour her confidence grew as she moved from letting Ari show her different tops to actually picking things out for herself. That wasn't to say she didn't feel a bit uncertain but she was willing to put up with that. She just hoped she could learn her confidence one day.

---

'Man, I don't know how you do it.' Summer sighed as she gratefully sank into the chair in the cafe, her aching arms instantly thanking her for letting go of the two bags she had been lugging from the last of the chain of stores Ari had shown her. Ari on the other hand was carrying three bags each as full as hers and she didn't seem to be even a little out of breath.

'Practice I guess.' Ari shrugged. 'I was just as exhausted the first time my sister took me shopping.'

'I can't imagine you ever being bad at this.' Summer said.

'You think so?' Ari laughed. 'Trust me, I was totally lost the first time. I had to get my sister to help with everything. You did pretty good for your first time out.'

'I don't know.' Summer sighed. 'I never really did anything like this before. Shopping was just something I did, you know. Maybe because I never had friends to go shopping with.'

'You must have had friends though.' Ari asked.

'Sure. But I more got on with the guys than the girls in school.' Summer admitted

'Wouldn't have pegged you for a tomboy.' Ari grinned.

'It wasn't quite like that.' Summer replied. 'Where I went to school, girls didn't really go into the military. So I was kinda the outsider in a way. It never used to bother me then.'

'But it does now?' Ari asked.

'Well, yeah. A little.' Summer confessed. 'I just can't help thinking I missed out on somethings by how I acted. If I'd opened up, let my guard down a bit, I could actually have made some more friends.'

'Well, better late than never right?' Ari said. 'So you didn't do this is school. You can make up for it now? Would that be so bad?'

---

Summer had been thinking on that all the way home and even as she stepped into the shower, the warm water doing nothing to stop the barrage of thoughts bouncing around her head. So what if this was something she had never done before. She had made some good memories with Ari. That had to count for more than worrying about things she hadn't done. As the water rushed over her, she thought on the wisdom of that. She should focus on making new memories. And if she keeps hanging out with Ari, who knows where it might go?

That was the bit she had missed, the realisation slipping neatly into the storm of thoughts that still whirled inside her. They had been hanging out. And she had already met and started getting on with one of her friends. Which had to be a good thing. Maybe it was okay to take this in small steps. Maybe for once she felt like she could take things slowly, rather than rush into it and do everything immediately. The strangeness of that thought caught her off guard. She searched for her usual worry that she was missing out on something if she wasn't doing it all the time. Only to find it oddly absent. Not that she was really complaining about that.

Nodding to herself, she stepped out of the shower and quickly grabbed a towel. This was going to be a new start for her. Starting today, she was going to seize life by the horns, not keep dwelling on what she felt she had missed.

---

Her good mood lasted right until she stepped into the living room, hearing the shrill ringing of the phone for the bare second before she grabbed the receiver, suppressing a groan as she heard the voice on the other end. 'Please hold for Marshal Skye.'

For a second Summer toyed with the idea of slamming the phone down right there and then. She was on the verge of slamming the phone down. But as tempting as that was she knew it would just make things worse. So she took a deep breath, steadying herself for what she knew was to come.

'Summer.' The line crackled and her father's voice filled her ear with that stilted single word utterance spoken so stiffly you would have thought he was addressing her by rank not name. Something that Summer still had to fight not to react too. 'Is this a bad time?'

Summer bit back her true feelings behind the control she had long developed. 'Not really father. Is something wrong?'

'No, no. Nothing like that.' He paused and she could hear the ruffling of paper, the tell-tale sound he was flicking through his diary. 'I was just calling to see if you wanted to get together over a meal at some point. I could easily get us a table at the Christof. It would be no trouble.'

Summer had no trouble believing that. Her father could always snap his fingers and get pretty much anything he wanted. What she couldn't believe was that this was just a chance call. Nothing he did was accidental or spur of the moment. 'Who else is going to be there?' Summer asked, taking great care how she asked that question.

'Who said there would be.' Came the reply.

'I'm sorry. I assumed this was a work event.' Summer said pointedly.

'Well, it is.' Her father continued as if the admission meant nothing, even as it made her heart sink. 'You remember General Fortescue Star don't you? His son just made captain and I thought you two might like to meet."

Summer bit back a sigh. She should have known. He certainly hadn't gotten any better at this. Well, not any more subtle about it. But that wasn't the point. 'Of course I do.' Summer said with feigned ease, something she had gotten very good at. 'I'll see if I can make it. When are you meeting up?

'We had a date for two weeks from now. On Saturday. I'll let him know you will be coming.'

'Sounds good to me.' Summer managed to keep her voice even. Nothing good would come from turning him down now. He would just find some way to twist her into this. 'I hate to run father, but I have a few reports to work on.'

'Of course.' He sounded like he was smiling; she could hear it in his voice. And it made her scowl inwardly. 'I'll see you later. Remember. Saturday.'

'I'll be there father.' Summer finished, carefully putting the receiver down before she spoke again. 'Unless something comes up that is.'

END.