FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

All my life, I wanted to be an author. I didn't just want to be a writer, as in a journalist, or one of those thousands working on America's next great book series, but a real author.

While most teenaged girls spent all their time daydreaming about hot boys, what to wear at prom, or whose screwing who, I spent all my mental time thinking about stories. I could get lost in my own head for hours at a time. All throughout high school, I wrote any chance I got. Waiting for a teacher to finish the review lesson? Nows a good time to describe a monster. It's three AM and I can't sleep? Welp, I've been wanting my protagonist to have a romantic interest, so now's a good enough time as any to get working on that. Needing some quiet time to myself? Nothing a little soft music and outlining couldn't fix.

I used to day dream about being on interviews, and seeing my work in bookstores. Yet, after I graduated college, I learned the true nature of what being an author really looked like.

In short, if you are capable of writing a novel in record time about whatever idiotic social trend is currently popular, you might get lucky enough to score an agent. Otherwise your shit out of luck. I have tried for three years to get any of my ten manuscripts published, but haven't received a single interested party.

So here I am, alone, exhausted from working all day in a dead end fast-food job, watching as the last rays of hope for my life slowly flutter out the open window I used instead of air-conditioning.

I stared at the ceiling of my one room apartment. My long white ears draped lazily above me, and my fur hadn't been brushed since before my last shift. When did I last work again? All I had left to my name was this mattress that also served as my couch, a small kitchen table I had inherited from the back alley that served as my kitchenette, a hot plate, and exactly three towels. I have a closet that holds five shirts, two pairs of pants, and fourteen pairs of panties. Last month I had bought my second bra, only to have my first one break... Leaving me with still only one bra.

I have four blocks of ramen left in the pantry before I completely run out of food. I expect that's about the time I give up completely and crawl back home to Chesterton with my tail between my legs, begging for mercy. Good old Chesterton, home of dead ends and disappointments... I have stopped crying myself to sleep weeks ago. Now I feel nothing.

I rolled over on my side, staring over the pile of dirty work clothes to the sliding glass door. The balcony was completely empty, but still somehow looked better than the inside.

I swiped away the mountain peak of the filthy greasy clothes, allowing the stench to waft through the room, but I didn't care. I was used to it by now, besides, it was blocking my view.

The sun was setting, and a beautiful golden glow poured into the filthy room. Twilight was always my favorite time of day, and had lately become the only thing I had left to look forward too. Well, especially since I had to sell my TV...

As I stared out the window, the glimmer of a lone spider's web in the corner kept snapping me out of my depression.

I crawled over the filthy pile, and edged myself close enough to the spiderweb that my normal breathing made the web eb and sway rhythmically.

I eventually found the webs owner, a tiny little thing pushed up into the corner of the web. As I stared at this tiny little spider, I could see as it's fuzzy mandibles twitched probably out of fear.

"Don't worry little guy, I won't hurt you." I said.

Just then, I watched as the little spider seemed to crawl to the front on the web.

"Oh? Did that make you happy?" I said, and watched as it lifted it's two front legs, and lowered them.

It was as if it could understand me or something.

"This might sound completely crazy, but... if you can understand me, lift one leg."

It lifted one leg.

I froze.

"Holy crap, I must be hallucinating or something." I shook my head, and leaned up.

"Alright, raise one leg for yes, and two legs for no, got it?" It raised one leg. "Ok, so... are you a boy?"

It raised two legs.

"Oh your a girl?" It raised one leg.

"I didn't mean to offend you, I don't know much about spiders... Forgive me?"

It raised one leg.

"Are all spiders as nice as you?"

It raised two legs. I couldn't help but chuckle. Even if I was completely losing my mind, I was having fun. So worth it.

"Okay-Okay, so you gotta tell me, do you have a boyfriend?"

It raised one arm.

Just then, a much smaller spider crawled out from deep within the web.

"Oh wait, I had heard male spiders were much smaller than females, but... I didn't expect them to be like... a hundred times smaller."

It retreated back into the web slightly.

"Oops! I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend you or anything. Please forgive me?"

I saw it move slightly back into the light. It pivoted towards the female, and then back towards me. It lifted one tiny leg.

"So what are you two up too? Anything interesting?"

The two spiders turned towards each other. The female turned towards me, and lifted one leg, then turned to retreat into the deepest part of the nest. She returned with a small little ball of web.

"Oh! I've seen this before! Is this an egg sack?"

The female raised one leg.

"Awwwww, you two had babies! That's so cute!"

I could feel a tinge of pain shoot through my heart. I hadn't had a boyfriend since high school. My last one I've been with for three years, but when I left for college I broke it off with him. Strangely, I saw him on campus, and the look of pain and anger in his eyes made me feel like such an ass.

During college a rumor spread about how much of an asshole I was, which pretty much scared every new potential boyfriend away. I didn't put too much into it, considering as I was preoccupied with my writing. However, after graduation when my hopes and dreams fell through the cracks, I couldn't help but regret having broken off the last chance I had at romance.

These days all I seem to have left is the occasional hang out's I get with Serena, my childhood best friend. She drives up every other weekend and we have coffee. I've never let her come see my place, despite her protests... I think she's really worried about me. Our hang outs tend to seem a bit more like... Like check ups these days. I don't know, I feel like I should be telling her the truth, but I don't want to be that downer friend. You know what I'm talking about...

"I'm so happy for you too! Omg, so will they be hatching soon?" The male lifted one leg. "Do spider's have names?" The female lifted two legs. "Would you like names?" The two spiders looked at each other. They both raised one leg.

"Alright! Then I think you should be Lucy and you should be Ricky! Do you like those names?" They both lifted a single foot.

"Then it's settled! Alright you two, I'm going to make myself some ramen. You mind waiting here for a bit?" They both raised two legs. "Cool, be right back."

I laid back after chugging the last of the salty broth at the bottom of the styrofoam cup, and fell back onto my bare mattress. I could feel the weight of the day sinking into every muscle fiber in my body. I was so much more than tired...

My phone told me it was almost nine in the evening and I winced as my next door neighbor would arrive home any second. I don't know what the hell she did for a living, but all she ever seemed to do was fuck her boyfriend, loudly announcing to the world how much better she was than me. Usually, this occurred late into the evening. But recently, I had noticed her in the hall, carrying boxes the rare times I took out my trash before passing out. I think she's moving in with her boyfriend or something, but who knows.

I remember those days, spending every waking second I wasn't writing thinking about my boyfriend. Even those days when I would hang with Serena and help babysit her adorable baby brother. Oh my god! I haven't thought about Tomás in ages! The thought pulled a wave of happiness over me like warm blankets. HE always had the cutest tail that would wrap around his leg whenever he was nervous. I kinda always thought he had the cutest little crush on me. Not in the creepy way, he was always very polite. But you know the kind? Where he was always trying to help? He even offered to help me with virtually everything. What a nice kid.

But just as fast as that wave of happiness washed over me, so too did the rainclouds...

I couldn't help but feel slightly jealous. When I was with Kevin, I was so happy. He was a nice guy, never seemed to pressure me half as much as most other guy's I had heard of. I lost my virginity with him in junior year, he was so caring and kind. I mean, I could easily still see myself with him if I hadn't screwed everything up....

I had thought -at the time- that I was doing him a favor. I figured he would probably get tired of me, with the distance and all. However, I don't recall ever even asking him where he was planning on going to college. I guess I might not have been the greatest girlfriend...

I had heard that college was the time to explore one's sexuality all my life. However, after finding out that my ex went to the same college and had seemingly spread a rumor that I was a heartless bitch, I found sex completely unachievable not that I was any good at it. I can even recall, though, Kev would always say the sweetest things, calling me cute whenever I tried to be sexy and all that. But then again I never seemed to try all that hard with him. He just had that small town feeling, you know? He was simple.

I couldn't help but admit that, even though I had broken kevin's heart, and he had every right to spread that rumor, he still was just as hot as ever. I mean, he might be even hotter in college. That, or I'm just incredibly pent up...

The hardest part was watching him slowly gain popularity with the girls on campus. One day, he was with this gorgeous golden retriever with huge boobs. The next a sultry -if not slutty- Vixen I had beginning writing with in my first term. Whenever he had eventually seemed to find a girlfriend, all the beta bitches began a waiting list. Whenever one was set free, the next in line slipped right in. Even if I had the confidence to approach him again, I couldn't possibly compete with all those other girls...

I sighed as I heard the door shut, and two sets of stomping footsteps alluded to a rather passionate scenario.

I looked to the spider couple in the corner, but... something had changed. The web seemed to be covered with little moving black dots.

I leaned in closer.

"Oh my gosh! Did your babies hatch?!" I said.

The female lifted one leg.

"They're so tiny!" I said, leaning in closer. They all looked like little copies of the larger female, except for a few that seemed to be even smaller -to which I assumed were male or something- and for once in a long while, I could feel pride building in my chest, even if they weren't my children. Somehow I felt a kinship with this strange brood of spiders.

"Will they all be leaving soon?"

The female spider turned to me, and raised one leg, but then did something strange. She seemed to be lowering her body, and raising it at a rapid pace, vibrating the entire web. All the spiderlings seemed to congregate in the center of the web then turned to me.

"Oh... um..." I hesitated.

The female spider raised one leg, and the whole group of spiderlings left the web. They all crawled like a originless shadow over the linoleum floor, around the now splayed dirty clothes pile, and onto the mattress right beside my face. They stoped only an inch from my nose. I could see them all so much better.

"Aww, you all are so beautiful!" I said, and they all started doing little spider push ups like Lucy had.

"So you all can understand me too?" They all continued doing push ups. "I'll take that as a yes." I giggled, then a devious thought popped in my head.

"Hey... you guys want to do me a huge favor?..." I asked. They all seemed to be at attention. "Before you guys start your new lives, can you all go to the next apartment-" I pointed to the wall now thumping behind my head. "-And tell me what's going on?" I knew this was stupid, not only could spiders not talk, but I was pretty sure this all was a big hallucination anyways, so might as well enjoy it while I can.

Two little spiderlings separated from the group, and crawled up my face before I could even react. I could feel them crawlthrough the white fur of my snout, and into my nose, reaching deep inside of me. I freaked out, but caught the strangest glimpse of Lucy in the peripheral of my eyes. Somehow, I couldn't help but think the words don't worry, it will all be okay.

So I calmed, Even when I could feel pressure behind my eyeballs, I didn't flinch. I closed my eyes, and suddenly I could see... myself. It was as though I was looking through the collective eyes of a thousand tiny spiderlings all at once!

The group began to pull away from me, climbed a terrifying looking decent down the sides of the mattress, and towards a small crack that I hadn't noticed even existed.

After a short period of momentary darkness, I saw light once more. I could see the naked behind of a beautifully sculpted male brown and white spotted rabbit. He ass flexed each time he thrusted himself into his partner, who moaned as what I could imagine was a pleasure I desperately craved.

I could feel my body back in my apartment warm, as I slid my hands into my pajama bottoms.

"A little closer, if you please." I whispered through a quivering voice.

The group of spiderlings seemed to be connected to me, and progressed towards the couple who were fucking against the opposite wall.

Suddenly, the man tensed up -as did I- and groaned in such beautiful way, as he thrusted hard into his feline mate. Her moans were high pitched, and came through a broken voice. I could feel my insides tighten and quiver as the waves I had been denied for so long finally washed over my entire body.

Afterwords, I watched as the man pulled out, allowing white droplets to fall upon the floor.

The man turned around, looking for what I assumed was a towel, only to show his beautifully familiar face to my spiderlings.

It was Kevin.

A combination of pain, betrayal, and rage filled me. Without warning, the spiders turned to the woman, panting, falling to the bed beside her, and wiping her crotch lazily. The spiderlings practically charged over to her foot, and engulfed the short blue-ish grey fur with a black haze. I could almost feel those thousands of tiny fangs reaching below all that fur, piercing through her thick skin, and pumping something warm into her blood stream. She kicked and screamed, but most of the spiderlings had already began to evacuate and rush towards the front door of the apartment. I could feel them beginning to grow and pulse and throb as though they were my own body.

I arose from the floor, growing taller and taller as I could feel the cooler conditioned air against my skin. I looked at my legs as I watched the thousand tiny things coalesce into my being, all the while being watched by kevin standing naked against the sliding glass door.

"Hello Kevin. Remember me?"

He nodded.

"I think it's about time you and me resumed what we had started all those years ago. What do you say?" I held out my hand.

"A-Anna, I-" He hesitated, and looked to his left.

I chuckled, turning to find that the women proped up against the wall from the mattress appeared dead. I walked over to her, and placed my hand on the top of her head. It began to dissolve into those tiny spiderlings as though I were made of the things. It began to cover her body.

After only a few more seconds, the spiderlings returned to my body, regained my shape, and the woman's body looked like a thousand year old dried-out mummy.

"If you still feel reserved about staying here with me, then I can find a different use for you. My babies are still hungry." I winked.

Kevin glanced over the corpse to my right, and walked towards me. I took his jaw in my hands, and kissed him deeply.

It has been two weeks since that night. Serena and I hang out even more than before, and I just love hearing her advice! She's like an endless wishing well of knowledge, especially regarding topics that have become increasingly relevant to me as of late. Also, I made a point to ask recently how Tomás is doing. He has to be a junior by now. Serena told me how excellent his progress is doing, and then she told me something that truly peaked my interest.

"Well keep me posted babe, it's been ages since we pigged out on junk food and had one of our famous movie nights!" I giggled.

"How about next weekend? I'll come pick you up and show you what I have been talking about." Came her smooth voice.

"Sounds good chika, text me the deets!" I said, hanging up.

I stared over Kevin's muscular frame. He has been such a loyal mate lately. We have over seven million children together, and he is an excellent provider. Every week, he brings over a girl more beautiful than the next. Afterwords, my children feed while we watch. Even Kevin has begun to add in his sweet commentary about how much our little ones have grown!

Afterwards, I make sure to reward him in ways no other woman could match. There are a thousand little things that build a healthy relationship. After all, it's the little things that matter, right?