one nation (poem)
In this "one nation under god", Our sense of right is just a fraud. We pray for death in a foreign country, While people here are ever hungry. We hate the gays for their way of love, Then pass off our hate as words from above. We're afraid of...
Two Coyotes Dancing. [It's poetry, sorry guys]
._ _so be crushing with critisism. seriously! i was never formally or informally trained. i like how this goes, but i have no idea if it is good or not. so hit me with your worst cutting critisisms.
Love after all
This is my first time writing a story, so go easy on your critisism. \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_
The Lab is off limits.
I really want to know what you liked/disliked about my story. please contact me. any critisism is better than no critisism at all.(it's the only way i can improve myself)
All Over Soon
Give me your thoughts and critisism thank you._ **all over soon** written by: jon ballenger [verse 1] with my weapon drawn i begin the hunt at dawn i shall hunt you all down one by one i bet all you can do now is run you don't know
a dark and stormy night
A blanket and he scoots closer and leans on me "thank you for helping me out" "of course this would have been a blessing when i ran away" ----this is my first story please comment the probs and the grammer problems and post your honest opinion positive critisism
my thoughts for the day
I feel retarded but i also feel beastly smart. i need to tell people who i really am and how i really feel. think of me all you want. call me names, critisize me, judge me, hate me, love me, tell me what you think. i care not what you say, all i care about
Pathfinder: Intro
So please post critisisms and comments in the comment section or something. i want to know what you guys think of it s'yeah. be brutally honest. any way... here. .__. nara woke in the abandoned, lean-to shed.
The Backgrounds
Out why it is called the special lovers in this chapter/segment. whenever you see these " " it is either a passage of time or the next little segment or me starting on a new part of the story. you all are going to hate me for the end, as always reveiws & critisism
Mew-World: Proluoge
Comments, and helpful critisism are welcome, but no unnecasarry complaints, just because you don't like it.**
Over in that Meadow ( chapter 1, New Friends and Lion Eyes)
( please read and tell me what you think, i love constructive critisism!) fire surrounded them as griffin cried over the wounded body of her friend, ash. oh ash, so kind, so wonderful, the only person who ever befriended griffin.
Iron and Agate
Please don't let my pride get in the way of constructive critisism. if grammar and spelling is off its because i wrote it on my phone and cut n pasted it here. right now i'm looking at content.