Dad's Home
I really enjoyed writing this lol :p if you have any constructive criticism, please let me know (otherwise i'll never learn!) ;) i stand there, letting the boiling hot water pour down onto my naked body. "ahh..." i sigh.
Jordan the Spider
The woman looked around the room critically. “but i \_can\_. is, uhh, anyone else going to call round for a while?" “my housemates are out getting more stuff for the party, they'll be a while yet. go nuts."
Duty Chapter 25: A Needed Calm
"i guess alex is one of them," he said, "...i mean...uh...i mean...you know...in critical condition..." jerry placed his hand on joji's shoulder, "go home, joji. we can take care of things around here."
Adventure at Confuzzled 2014
Obligatory criticism: there are enough electric guitars and singing solos across the planet as it is, try to mix it up like the amusing rabbit did.
Making an interview
"hum not bad your sister is uh, quite nice in these" dera said blushing a little herself though inashi didn't know why "she seems very nice and is fit enough to join our starters we take recruited models to a few of our critics we critic our own work to make
Allies and Enemies
Her eyes blinked deliberately with a slight shake of the head, almost as if she had suddenly reached a critical decision.
Nana
Neither of us was depressed, rather, we were absorbing all that we had done on that call, ensuring that neither of us missed something critical to that patient's survival.
Stable Service
Oh yes and one other thing, i would greatly appreciate constructive criticism. this is the first story i've ever posted and only the third i've ever written. i know it's not great but as stated above, take it at face value.
Another Kind of Empathy - Prologue
Don't forget that constructive criticism! (so nervous... sitting here for 5 minutes hovering over the button... okay, deep breaths. 3... 2... 1... save!)
Seeing Stripes: Late Night Drink
Any criticism is greatly appreciated! also, be on the look out for more to this story! :o_**
Defenders of Evodusai Part 4
One of them came up to me and broke open the bad news. "...critical...missing...painless..." were the only words that i could make out through all of the panic. watching them dragging out the captured fugitives set me off into a rampage.
A Night's Work
Since i'm always up for getting criticism, whether good or bad, i'm putting it up. oh, and i'm not really sure if this is clean or not, so if you guys think it should be marked as adult, i'll do that instead. anyways...