Commando and the Dragon (Revised)
1. Chapter 1 “Fort Myrra, here we are". I thought as the buss stopped. Sargent Crowley stood up. “Everyone, gather your belongings and exit the buss in single file", Sargent Crowley said. We followed our commanding officer to the...
Changes *revised version*
Hey guys. i read your comments so far and i rewrote some of it. thanks for all the tips, as they are greatly appreciated. I thank you for your comments and i will keep writing! \<3 A Bloodsucker If you are underaged or dont like reading M/M...
Kinira's Reign (revised)
Only the Pridelanders and the lionesses of Zira who had joined Simba's pride knew how Kovu had died. The dark son of Scar had rushed blindly from Pride Rock, tears cascading down his face at Kiara's accusation of him. "You are Scar!" The words...
Church Witness, Revised
I'm available weekday afternoons free of charge ^^ the church witness, revised by: 'god'..don't question me. the church was dim as usual, save for the occasional percussion of several varieties of old-style instruments.
An Unexpected Pleasure (Revised)
#2 of shaun and connie cover art is not my property, though when i saw it i immediately thought of this story and had to revise it as preparation for the next segment. next part...
Bullshit Errands (revised)
Matthew Romi was having a bad day, to say the least. He stared blankly through the windshield of his dilapidated vehicle as it puttered and lurched down the filthy, unkempt backroads of the godforsaken hellhole (his words) to which his soul-sucking...
Reaching for the Stars - Chapter 28: A Panther and a Wolf
"sorry, i have revisions to do tonight." "too bad." the lion just laughed. "anyway, some guys caught your eyes lately?" he shrugged. "not really. why do you ask that?" "well, you didn't seem to have some chicks." andy slurped his soda.
After the Storm - Part 24 [The Visitors]
However, inspiration struck and i thought that i could improve the chapter, so i decided to revise it.
Chapter IV: Secrets in the Water
**first revision (4/17/13):** it's taken over three years, but i've finally updated the original. this will be the last chapter to undergo a serious revision, as i'm pretty satisfied with the recent ones.
A Weekend Visit pt.1
Twenty minutes later, i was almost just about finishing up with my second revision of her paper. i laced my fingers together and stretched, leaning far back in the chair as i did.
Control Freak
To revise the hell out of that, and now here is the watered-down version of that revision, which i decided was too violent.
Organized Crime- Chapter 1
Huge thanks to the help i received from draugr on my revisions :d enjoy, please comment as feedback helps me to become a better writer.